stop shopping

Okay, this has been an odd week. I had one day that I actually spent NO money! :D (Makes me laugh to think that I am excited about that… I have read articles about people who don’t spend any money for a year besides food and basic life necessities!!)
But I feel like I did an alright job. I am ready for week 2! Today, I went to Target (my nightmare!) to get a huge bowl to use to take my mixed salad to our family’s Thanksgiving dinner tomorrow, I found a rubbermaid one for $8 with a lock top. I also bought my little sister’s Christmas presents and a larger binder for my anatomy class. I did go outside of my desired list because I found a breast cancer awareness daily planner for 2010 on clearance (it was $6 and if you look in one of the previous entries, I wanted to get one, so I was glad to find one on sale) and this mini palette I got my little sister for Christmas was only $5 so I got myself one too. I then went to the grocery store with $20 budget for my salad (big family=big salad, lol) and I stayed within it :D
Yesterday, I spent $20 on food. $5 at work and $15 when my boyfriend and I went out with our friends.
All in all, not too bad, but I spent $57 on food outside the house. And today is not over yet, I still have to go to work…
That urge to spend money has subsided somewhat. I found a pair of hello kitty pj pants that I liked but I resisted, telling myself that I have plenty of pants for bed! High five for me :]

Today has been tough.. This feels like a legit addiction and I never realized it. All day I have wanted to spend my money on something. I never left except to go to school and I still had $4 in my purse and my body kept telling me that I was hungry, that I wanted something to drink, candy out of the vending machine. I knew I wasn’t hungry, I knew I needed nothing!!! It was making me anxious and I kept wanting to go buy something and I am still annoyed and STILL want to buy something and I am already home, so I just have to get through this day.. One day at a time.

Yesterday I spent $7 on popcorn, candy, and soda. My boyfriend and I went to his brother and sister in law’s house to watch movies and have dinner. Since they were making dinner, we thought to bring treats :]
I also paid my tuition, which is a necessary evil :]
But I am proud of myself. That’s all I spent. However, it is getting difficult. I want to go buy a pair of shoes at American Eagle and I am fighting myself to not go buy them. It’s really annoying. I also want a new planner and I KNOW I don’t need it right now!!
I am just focusing on what I have here and now and not leaving my house until I go to school, lol.

Oh and I went to go get a loan, yeah, they only do that online.. And to change my T-Mobile plan, it will cost $70 that we don’t really have right now.. So when we are able to pay to lower our bill (which will save us money in the long run) we will.

Day 3:
I forgot to write that on day one, I bought gas. Today, it’s groceries, which I spent $75. But otherwise, that’s all I have to buy. :]
Yesterday, day 2, I bought lunch. I think I spent $10 overall.

So day one, with work, went fine of course. My boyfriend had a rough day at work, so I went to Fresh and Easy after work and got some special dinner, so I spent $20. But other than that I didn’t spend any money. Today is day 2 and I work again, so the only trouble here is getting junk food at work.. :[ I don’t have a fridge at this location so I can’t take anything with me really.. We’ll see.
Tomorrow, I have to go grocery shopping which is budgeted at $120. I have class in the morning and at night, so, my day should go: school, groceries, home to study, back to school. no spending :D
Wednesday, I am going to the bank to try to see if I can get a loan for a car that I have found. And I want to go to T-mobile to see if I can lessen our phone bill. The rest of the day should be spent studying for a quiz on Thursday.
Thursday should be the same as Tuesday minus grocery shopping and plus laundry and some more studying… Friday, it’s back to work as well as Saturday and Sunday I have off for our family Thanksgiving.
So, this is what the week should look like… NO SPENDING!!!

Don’t mind this BORING entry, it is just so I can keep track of what my goals are… :]

So this is day one for real. hehe!

So, my best friend started going through all the clothing that I was getting rid of and she would ask me why I was getting rid of each piece of clothing. I couldn’t explain why I was getting rid of most of my clothes, besides, “Oh, I just didn’t like it.” So I realized that I really need to focus on controlling my shopping..
So, today I bought a sweater and a pair of pants when I was out with my best friend. I also bought a tv… Yeah.. My boyfriend and I split it and it is our Christmas gift to each other.
So tomorrow.. Day one of shopping control! I work, so that will help. But three points of this goal:
1. Not buying clothes.
-Yeah, let’s face it, I really don’t need anymore clothes!!!
2. Buying what I go into a store for.
-Target kills me. I go into Target for three things and leave with things I don’t really need..
-Things I don’t need from Target right now: shampoo, conditioner, styling products, makeup, lotion, and body wash.
3. Focus on not eating out.
-The money spent on eating out is just ridiculous. I spend about 100-120 a week on groceries for my boyfriend and I and then at least another 50 while I am at work. It’s silly.

Okay.. So day one.

Woohoo! I need all the encouragement I can give myself for this goal because this is really tough for me. So YAY for 8 hours with no shopping or online “window shopping! I can do this!

Because I really want to shop. Shopping is my coping mechanism when I’m feeling stressed, frustrated, lonely…you name it and I use it as an excuse to shop. I’ll start by researching my purchases online, sometimes spending way more time than I have…Then I may go to the store and spend more money than I have. It’s a vicious cycle because spending all that time and money on shopping makes me more stressed out than I was before. Often I’ll go and return the things I buy simply because I can’t afford them and I associate so much guilt with them that I don’t want them anymore. I think breaking this habit will benefit me immensely in every aspect of my life. The ironic thing is that I think what I’m craving is simplicity! That may not make sense, but achieving more simplicity in a particular aspect of my life is the only thing that has made me stop shopping for things pertaining to that aspect. I also think I use shopping to express myself. I have always loved having creative pursuits…creative writing, drawing, painting, and dancing, and I haven’t done any of that in as long as I can remember. It’s going to be really difficult, but I think that what I need to do in order to acheive this goal is to stop cold-turkey. Because every time I give in to the urge, I feed it and make it stronger. Hopefully, just like I did with my “quit drinking” goal, over time, I’ll be able to distance myself from the irrational voice that urges me to make bad choices, and in the mean time, I’ll fulfill my desires for simplicity and creative expression in healthier, truly fulfilling ways.

I’ve realized that all the things I purchace a wants and not a need. My wants were starting to get really ridiculous! So now I let my wants marinate for awhile to see if I really want it. Plus washing and putting away all those damn close where starting to drive me crazy!