live no matter what

And yee-haw, ya-hee, hoo-lee-oh-dee-oh and all other kinds of interjections. It’s all blistering green and I’m scared as hell.
Which is always good.
Yoo hoo.

Right now I don’t care. It’s all just peace and love, and, even though it sounds really boring even to myself, I wouldn’t change a thing.
My red toe-nails are smiling at me, and I know it doesn’t get better than this, and a bowl of black cherries, of course.
And I learned a lot of cool stuff lately, like blowing soap bubbles through a circle formed by my fingers, or how to use physics in order to splash yoghurt icecream all over some guy who’s annoying you.
The “what” that doesn’t matter right now is the exam I’ll be taking in like three weeks. But I said it doesn’t matter, and I’m living.
I’m living IT.

I love how after a day when everything goes from bad to worse something good happens and then everything’s just green and shiny again.
But really, is living the same as being happy?
For now, I’d say it is, cause I don’t really need more than that.

I don’t have any idea what I understand by living my life anymore. Lately it’s been just getting others mad at me, getting mad at others, hating everything and everybody. And I don’t think that counts as living.

But it’s not at all as simple as it sounds.
This is a time when I don’t really feel like living.
I mean… I just wanna sleep. It’s not natural, and they all hate me for not spending time with them, or being a boring asshole when I do…
But me…
I just wanna hibernate. At least as long as the winter holiday’s not over yet.

I hate the fact that I forget so often how beautiful life actually is. And then I start complaining, and bitching, and moaning, and hating myself and everybody around me… And it’s just not fair. Cause it all depends on how you look at it. No matter how tired, bored or bitter you might feel at some point, it’s still in your power to be happy.
It’s all up to me.
Oh, yeah, I love saying that.
Makes me feel so powerful.