keep a gratitude journal

:)

raw oysters. love, love, love them.

fake chicken nuggets.

i heart the rebeccas. they’re really fun together. i especially liked hanging out with my original rebecca. it had been too long.

colin is so entertaining and really nice to look at. what a charmer.

the wu.

it was so gross looking outside. i was sure it would be cold and raining, but by the time i kicked myself out of the apartment, it was actually nice. the rain had stopped and it was, like, 60 degrees. i really appreciate that.

my downstairs neighbors are playing really good music. i almost don’t mind at all that it’s past midnight and i can hear it like it’s in the next room.

mr. pavlina wrote back and answered my question. that was nice.

an ex-boyfriend wrote me back too. i wrote him a week ago or so to tell him about the dream i had with him recently. it was a really sweet one. turns out, i think it’s because the young designer guy reminds me of him a bit. i think that’s partly why i’m a little disappointed in him. he’s not the ex and i guess part of me wishes he were. ah, well. it was nice to be in touch.

-I slept last night. Really slept. Stayed asleep all night, without even a hint of nightmare. It was fantastic..
-Woke up fresh and ready to be productive this morning. Checked out a few places this morning in my search for a better apartment. Didn’t find what I was looking for, but had a lovely long drive and got to see a bit more of my city. :)
-Had a great talk with ReeseCake today about going to the Center for Puppetry Arts in January. She was excited, which made me excited. Haha.
-CC was not such a pain today. We had fires, but I put them all out, and all my cases are covered. Nurses are STILL not calling me back, but the ones I do manage to get ahold of are ready and willing to fill these cases. Thank Heaven. :)
-Having problems with my A/C at home, so I’m very grateful that it has been cool enough to leave the windows open and not die of heat stroke. :) Will have to make another call about that in the morning.

nutritional yeast – it’s just so damned tasty.

that i’m facebook friends with steve pavlina. never met him but i follow his blog and think he’s one of the cooler humans on the planet. on his blog he invited whoever to friend him and i did! anyway, that was months ago. but i just sent him a fb message with a question about his latest blog entry. i wonder if he’ll answer. i wonder if i will find a way to make it to his workshop in january or in 2010 at all. hmm…

i made some progress on my paper. i plan to keep at it until late into the night. it could even get done tomorrowish. magari!

nice conversation with the tea shop guy. we had a lot in common and it was really fun to chat and chat.

i felt a little lonely and bummed that i was single the other night, but now i’m totally over it and think it feels good to be independent. i’m grateful that i get some male attention on occasion and that i feel fulfilled in many other areas of my life: i have great friends; i love my career path and i am steadily progressing on it; i have an abundance of interests and hobbies; i live in a city that provides plenty of opportunity to meet new people and see good music and art and participate in community; and i have many sources of inspiration for growth. my life is pretty effing awesome.

coconut water – it tastes so good and makes my body feel so good.

fedex delivered my new laptop! a neighbor signed for it. thank goodness. i’m rarely home when they deliver and the fedex warehouse might as well be in another state. hooray for nice neighbors!

...that I needed to do this when my “Reflect on 5 things for which I’m grateful” goal fell apart anytime that I couldn’t get to a computer. I was given a beautiful leather bound journal with flowers all over it, and instantly I knew what I would use it for. It is beauty, inspiration, and gratitude bound in Italian leather. Perfect.

Well worth doing.

wu on my lap.

per my request, the truck guy overstuffed my hummus sandwich today with lettuce and cucumbers – yum!

i think i can catch up on my school work before it’s too late

e.c. gave me a nice pep talk last night.

art. it expands my perspective beyond myself and my ordinary thought processes. it’s an invitation to look up, look closer, and notice.

I appreciate Ella and Annie understanding that I was just plain too darn tired to drive all the way out to Citrus Park this morning. I felt bad about bailing on them, but I wasn’t safe to drive. Gotta get some sleep before I lose my mind..

I was so happy to hear from ReeseCake today. She requested my presence at the house today, to watch her new movie (Up) and to bring her popcorn. :) haha. On the way out there I got pulled over on the Polk Parkway for doing 78 in a 60mph zone. And the guy that clocked me was like..SUPER Trooper! He pulled over THREE of us all at once, without anybody getting away, or crashing into each other. I was amazed. PLUS he let us all off with a warning. (For which I’m grateful. Another $239 ticket would have been the straw that broke my financial situation’s back..)
And after a full day of spoiling Reesie, right when the sugar high I’d brought on with ice cream, m&ms and root beer started to kick into high gear, Tara called to ask if I wanted an extra shift tonight. 12 hours of overtime—how could I say no? So I tore home, showered and hit the office. I’m excited for my next paycheck now. I’m completely out of debt now, I just have to build my safety net back up.
And I’m indescribably grateful that tonight has been a quite night at work. I was afraid of having another night full of emergency situations and not enough nurses.
Now if I could just get some sleep today… :)

feeling strong – emotionally and physically. i could feel a lot stronger, of course, but compared to other times in my life, i feel super solid.

judge c. was gracious with me today. i went into her courtroom this morning, unwittingly caused a conflict of interest and then unwittingly stepped on some toes trying to undo the conflict. then she solved everything. she always knows the right thing to do and say. she is a true master of grace and civility. she doesn’t know it but she’s totally on my personal board of directors.

my clinical prof gave me some career advice today. she was very encouraging.

green tea from sri lanka.

buckwheat groats with banana.

chatting with j.b. on the train. he’s truly cool and real and amazingly nice and has a dreamy southern accent. all that and zero pretension. his wife is a lucky lady.

i showed up for tax and even kind of paid attention a little. just a little.

my new coat kept me so warm and dry on this cold, wet day!

..I am grateful that I get to go home in an hour. I’m too tired to even think properly. (nightmares again.)

Not sure I should be driving home actually..

I visited with my mother and brothers yesterday. Just one of those unplanned get-togethers that are always such fun. Mom and Dad tore thru their desk the other day, looking for their 2008 tax return. So there was a giant pile next to the desk that was full of fascinating stuff for us to look thru.
Looking at all those old photos, it was amazing to see how many vacations we took as a family, how many activities each of us kids participated in, how often Dad coached our sports teams. Andy’s hilariously ugly 80’s bermuda shorts, my cringe-inducing 4th grade haircut, Bubba’s pointy ears and goofy-kid smile. And the older pictures, where I can’t tell myself from Kelly. Our parents documented every little thing we did. Even the stuff that we thought was insignificant at the time, Mom and Dad wanted to keep forever.
I’m grateful that my parents took the time to have fun with us, and to keep these mementos for us to keep looking back on, proof that our childhoods were as happy as anyone can hope for. And that the older generations did the same. My niece feels very close to Gran and Papa Bill, even though she never had a chance to meet them in person. And I can honestly say, looking at these things, and remembering the moment each picture represents, that we had more fun, and shared more laughter than any other family I’ve come in contact with. Even our difficult times were happy ones, because there was never a fear of being alone. All for one and one for all, you might say. :)