write love letters in secret

So my Nikki discovered this site, so the secret is out of the bag, but does not mean I can’t do other secret evils :-P

My Dearest Nikki

Last night we talked about what we daydream about the other, what questions we ponder, pertaining to possibilities. I gave you my answers without reluctance, for the first time in a long time I felt I could do so without fear of my answers imprisoning me. As each day passes, more and more, I speak to you as I would the love of my life, my soul mate, my twin flame. I have been stupid in love before, I know that feeling, and this is not it, I feel we have a clarity which is indescribable. I think many things, but in those thoughts you are always with me, everything else is just scenery. I hope the things to come will be great, I hope I can overcome limitations and go on adventures. Now its only a day and a half until I see you for the very first time, my what beauty I will see. If I forget that the world exists, its will be the cause of you standing in front of me. Those things to come, play out like a grand orchestra, whether I do the Tango or you do the Jive, least were dancing together.

Your Love
Dana

My Nikki

You have a question in your heart over a statement I made, you want the explanation no doubt to revel in my affection, but I can’t explicitly make due my thoughts on the matter, and this is why I wrote this letter. When you read this, it will answer that question, when I said I love you more, these letters are the answers to your question. I hope these letters can deepen your appreciation for me, even though I will/have strive(d) everyday to make your appreciation worthwhile. I know many months from now I will be in whatever standing, but let this be a reminder, you might have to come to love that there is always a bit of mystery in my heart, and perhaps what I could do next. I love your questions, but my answers will be shown in time.

Your Love
Dana

Readers, this weekend I plan on seeing Nikki, and we arranged plans so I would be able to see the Patriots on Tv, well today My mom told me she could score tickets for the Patriots game if we wanted, keep in mind, 16-0 possible perfect season…

My Dearest Nicole

I have to chuckle because you called my fanhood of the Patriots an obsession, and today I have found out, given my obsessions or you, I would choose you. I did not ask for this moment, or decision, but it has come, and I can’t but feel like I am the scripted part of Robin Williams in Good Will Hunting “Sorry I have to go see about a girl.” Though one may worry about what I would be missing if its a great game, I am worried about what I am missing if I don’t see you. My perfect season(life) doesn’t begin with the Patriots, it begins with you. I feel I am making the right choice, and thats whats beautiful about my choice to see you, perhaps another time I would cancel and go to the game. My thoughts would be with you even in a crowd of 20,000+ people. I guess it comes down to the question, Is the juice worth the squeeze? I think so :-P

Well readers, my original plan was to go to NY and meet Nikki in Manhattan and we were going to walk in Central Park, yes in the winter, I know. Last night we had to change plans….

My Dearest Nikki

Though you never did thank me, though I know you will in time, admit it my conflict of traveling and not being able to see the Patriots game was a blessing in disguise. I feel we made a better plan to see each other, and you were open to solving my problems, no you did not cure my obsession (Patriots), but you will instead join me in watching them that night. Seeing you will be the highlight, being with you will be the best, and the Patriots game is just the extra scoop of ice cream. Before being in NY I was reluctant, mainly because I am not a fan of the City, but in our new plans, I am so excited that there is not a fear or doubt in my mind that we will have a fantastic time together. I am a patient man in regard to the workings of time, but I can only find myself standing beside you in my thoughts. When they say love grows over time, it is these instances that they spoke of.

Love(Still growing)
Dana

My Dearest Nikki

Last night was interesting, and I am all apologies. I dare not say this to you, but you have gotten inside, you have glimpsed one of my worse qualities and you did not run for cover. I seek not a personal accomplishment to get you to run, from now on, unless its toward me. My greatest fear, like many, is that you will see me and not like what is there. It is true you didn’t like what was there, but you felt I was worth staying for, and I hope to reward you in the same way you have given to me. My energy is now directed to showing you why I am the right choice….everyday
Love you
Dana

My Dearest Nikki

I find myself committing, and you likewise, a crime that could in times of old cost me my hands. You continue to steal my heart with each passing day, and though I know you steal from me, I never find anything is lost. I hope your thievery skills never diminish, but now I want to give you myself willingly.
You worry about other women and perhaps how they may coax me away from you, but I feel the threads of your heart and I wear them as a garment of pride. That will be enough to ward off others who interested in what I have, but telling them it is you will certainly eliminate all interest. Trust that I am going nowhere that I wouldn’t want to be, if nowhere is in your heart, thats the somewhere I want to be.
Your Love
Dana

So readers, the other night I was so eager to tell my girl about my day, because quite frankly me have an exciting day is rare, and considering my upcoming job stuff, I wanted to share this gem because who knows if the river will dry up (aka me not having as many stories). So she knew I was flustered, because she did a GW Bush ADHD thing, not sure if you’ve seen but there is one speak and Bush is talking then he is like “ohh look at the Kitty” Well thats what Nicole did to me, except I was telling her a story and she informs me “What Women Want” with Mel Gibson is on, So that flustered me, and I wrote to her and told her so, and this is a letter I would write as of yesterday night.

My Dearest Nicole

It was only a few night ago that I expressed my frustrations over the interruptions that naturally occur in our conversations. I don’t know why I felt irritated or worried, not that the value of what I have to say outweighs my joy of just speaking with you, but it is nice to ramble sometimes endlessly, for we will have those days in our lives where we are bursting to tell the person we care about all the good things. The very next night you took no offense to my words and you made sure that I had time to speak my mind and my heart :-). I felt bad knowing perhaps it was me that needed to make the adjustment, perhaps I had the over reaction, and still you did it anyways. It was no sacrifice of comfort for you. I cannot but be humbled by your actions towards me, the very first time you felt you interrupted my flow you apologized, right than my whole being was in love with you, not because you apologized, but because I realized I would love to be interrupted by you, for however long time permits it to be so. I count away my seconds, minutes, hours knowing anything that can be said will be said in time, but forgive me if I want to tell you the contents of my being in one day; With patience, I shall be mindful of when speaking to you, as for spoken love, I shall willingly remain reckless with my tongue :-P
Your Love
Dana

Well, Lets bring in the new year of 2008 with an exciting goal. As the title of this goal implies, it is love letters, but they will be secret from my love. Most would say I should share such letters with her, but I say nay, for this will become my forum and freedom to express any notion of appreciation. I feel wickedly evil doing such a thing, but if you must know reader, I do this so that perhaps at a 1 year anniversary I may bind these entries together and show her that I have felt intensely so all along. So applaud my boldness, but keep it in a whisper, for all may be for naught. So without further ado, let me describe thy prize of thy heart :-)

So in the month of December Christmas came early, not in the regards that I heard rain deer hooves on my roof, or that I found after purchasing cookies a villainous figure named Chris Cringle ate them. I refer to that which makes poets write, Love. Love is indeed elusive, but in the form of a woman named Nicole, it eludes me not. Yes ladies and gentlemen, this Nicole may be the Alpha and the Omega, the beginning of my end in the quest for love. I have never had so much in common with a woman as I have Nicole, and in your best James Lipton voice I choose to describe it in one word “Fascinating”. I spend the better part of my time thinking of when we shall talk once more. I wake up in the morning and she is the graceful thought in my mind. As I fall in darkness she is the dream weaver to subduing REM. Unexpectedly so, to these thoughts her modesty does show.

Today we learned that we both have a strange habit where we do not sleep unless its on our right side of the body, I thought I was a freak, but apparently she is a freak like me :-) Hey now!