take part in the Big Peace

I tried this. It was entertaining and I am sure it has helped alot of people. 3 years ago

I read the emails when they came in, but I don’t really feel like the whole thing was for me, it just didn’t click with me I guess.

Still, the emails were interesting even if I didn’t “Do” them. 3 years ago

..because most of the exercises I merely cast an eye over and went “Hm, yeah, interesting, I’ll do that later”, and then totally failed to find time to do. There’s something frightening about the fact that I put my own relaxation last on the list. But nontheless, it was an interesting exercise and gave me some food for thought, not least in my own capacity as life coach.

One thing I’ve learned is that I definitely definitely need to make time to chill out. I’ve taken to going to bed earlier, and switching off the computer earlier, and even taking breaks away from it, but it’s still not enough, really. Perhaps I could actively plan my relaxation like I actively plan everything else in my life. 3 years ago

Q. If you refused to conform this week – and used your ‘love and
good instincts’ to find some peace – how would you do it?

By staying away from all the negativity of the current political scandal about the mayor and his mistress. Avoiding conversations with my sister about men and dating. Watch less of the news.

Q. If you weren’t nice – who would you be instead? I am not nice. I gave that up years ago. Too draining. I would like to improve on my ability to honor myself and be more willing to have truthful conversations with those around me, say no to anything less.

Q. If you weren’t nice – how would you spend your weekend? Doing what I do normally for the most part.

Q. If you howled, what would you howl about? I howl already.

Q. If you were to cook an idea this week – Starting a business with my children. Investing in them. Putting what I need in the van and leaving the state.

Have a wild week!
I will! :) 4 years ago

I probably won’t answer all these right now. It’s late and the mood I’m in I’m apt to answer through gloomy spectacles.

Q. If you are going to have a lovely, peaceful 2008 – what do you need to differently?

Find work I love and deserve, that treats me right and fits into the other things I want/have to do. Find time to relax and exercise. Make sleep a priority. Accept that I can’t do it all, or, rather, that I can do it all, but I might not be able to do it all at once, right now, nor do I have to.

Q. How can you spend more time around people who love you?

Switch off the computer more often. Work/study less. Set up regular times and dates to see them, like the dance class I’m starting Monday with my bro’s gf.

Q. How can you tune into your inner coach?

Oddly, I think the best way to do this is to coach other people. A lot of people are great at giving others advice, and crap at seeing through their own smog. Coaching is not advising, but I often come up with great ideas for myself when I’m coaching someone else.

Q. How can your nurture your body versus starve it?

Make time to exercise. Learn to love and respect my body, and not talk trash to it. Have others show they love and respect it. Above all, express myself and be happy so that I don’t feel the need to fill it when I’m not hungry.

Q. How can you embrace your imperfections?

Accept that they’re not as obvious to others as to me? God, I don’t know. Pick fault with others so I don’t feel so shitty? Yeah, I know, I don’t mean that. I shouldn’t even mean the first one, as it shouldn’t matter how obvious they are to others, but it does.

Q. What excites you and how can you be more excited every day?

Helping people achieve and change and make huge leaps in realisation excites me. No prizes for guessing how I can be more excited every day, then. Feeling happy with myself and my life excites me. Getting some joy back into my life should be a priority. Knowing that other people’s lives are enriched by my being around excites me. I can… be around more? I guess I can consciously add to people’s lives more. I’ve been very busy working on my own lately. Hell, I’m not even funny any more, and that sucks.

Q. How can you enjoy the present right now without chasing rainbows?

Q. What do you want your ‘Big Peace’ year to look like? 4 years ago

..”My busy diary shows to the world that”... I guess that I know I deserve better and I’m working towards getting it? I don’t know what it shows, my answer to this changes with the hours and my ever-changing moods. Right now, I’m feeling spectacularly demoralised and rather depressed, and I feel my diary shows that I’m frantic, stressed, a control freak, don’t value my mental health or physical health enough to slow down and relax (huh! that’s why I’ve just finished studying for the day at midnight), and am a little bit desperate about my life and the way it’s going.

It shows that I feel that I’m running out of time.

Yeah, I think that last one is the most accurate. It shows that I feel that I’m fighting time to get it all in, to get my life how I want it to be, so that I can do the things I really want to do and enjoy them for as long as possible.

Once I’ve got all the things I want in place… how am I going to slow down and enjoy them? Am I going to? 4 years ago

So, today’s email just got in (Just in time for me to procrastinate a little after lunch) and actually, the answer to this was very easy:

My busy diary/schedule shows to the world that I am having the time of my life.

In fact, I sometimes get grumpy if I don’t have anything planned for a whole weekend – Like Calypte said in her post, to me everything I think about on this challenge is positive. 4 years ago

So, I’m curious about this and so following it along out of interest, but really, I don’t need much help in kicking back and relaxing – In fact, I do it too much really, but I am interested in finding some more optimal ways to do it, in the hope that the net effect will make me more productive.

Or something like that. 4 years ago

Here’s to the next level. Thanks Abs 4 years ago

“Just spend one minute answering this question on a piece of paper.
Complete the sentence.

My busy diary/schedule shows to the world that I am…............
(A screw-up? Very successful? Very popular? Very loved? Very
disorganised? In control? Master of your own destiny? )

Be honest. You don’t have to share this with anyone.”

Hm. I’m going to bed to ponder this. And I might not share it with anyone. 4 years ago

The Big Peace is a 90-day coaching programme designed by life coach Suzy Greaves to help people get some calm back into their busy, stressed lives. And I think this is just what I need.

Anyone who knows me knows that I find it really hard to sit down and do nothing, and I’m always working on about ten different things at once. I am stressed to the point of exhaustion a lot of the time, and yet I have a mental block on relaxation. I think it’s cos I spent ten years stoned off my tree sitting in front of a telly doing the bare minimum I needed to get by, and now it’s catching up with me. It’s not that I have a lot of energy – I’m tired pretty much the whole time – it’s just that there is always something that I want to do. The idea of coming home from work, cooking dinner and sitting down in a comfy chair to relax for the evening fills me with dread and panic. Even my favourite down-time activity – posting on 43things – is centred around goals and doing and self-development.

It can’t be healthy.

So yesterday I completed the first of my missions from Suzy – to sit quietly for half an hour and relax. I also was asked to rate how hard this was for me, as this will give me a benchmark to rate myself by for the rest of the course. I think it was about an eight out of ten (with ten being “so hard I didn’t do it, I didn’t have time”). It would have been at least a nine, maybe a ten, if it hadn’t been a Friday night. But I was already shattered, and the idea of sitting and reading (umm… I’m reading The Hoff’s autobiography, a thoughtful present from my little brother) was actually quite appealing. Though I did leave it until 10.30 at night, after I’d got all the evening’s tasks out of the way before I did it. Had it been a school night I doubt I would have got it done at all.

Tellingly, my first instinct was to use the half an hour to watch a documentary I had downloaded on my computer, then I thought, “Ooh, and I can pluck my eyebrows and file my nails and maybe do a face mask while I watch it.” Then I realised that would be multitasking in the extreme, plus balancing on my yoga ball while doing four things at once isn’t exactly relaxing. So I cut it down to reading, wearing a face mask, and tickling Askit behind his ears. Amazingly, I managed to stay put on the sofa for 45 minutes. HA said he didn’t think he’d ever seen me sit there for so long. Kind of a shame that I have to take instruction to sit still and be nice to myself for a bit before I’ll actually do it.

So, day one over with. I’m sitting tight and waiting for my next mission. Should I find the time and energy to accept it. 4 years ago