experience love

let it happen…

I have had many loves in my short life. Now that I am told it may not be much longer of one I find myself craving it more than ever.

I’ve been married, and now divorced. But never had True RECIPROCATED Love. Despite the Cancer, i am happier now than I have ever been thanks to one man. My best friend, and my soul mate. However, my illness makes him afraid to get close to me in that way.

We live together, work together, and area as close as ever, but he won’t ever let go and just Love. Perhaps it’s me, maybe I am incapable of being loved in return.

Who knows the Whys but that is what I want beyond all else. To love, as I always do, and be loved back in full measure.

I just didn’t fall in love with any girl before,so I just want to experience it.
I want to feel these things my friends or the movies and the novels always talk about and describe.

I want to feel it and i want it to be mezmorizing contagious and i want it to last forever i dont want the kind that is advertized all trhought the world but the kind that everyone knows is true and then think they are wrong its real people just wait and it will show love is beutiful and you sould love beutifully

muhabbat krne walon se puchho muhabbat me kya mza hai,mil jae to jannat wrna sbse bdi sza hai

So, I realized today, as I was searching through my 41 things, that I’ve experienced love. I see love everyday. Even if it isn’t directed toward me, or if it isn’t sent from me, I’m around it, and it effects everything in my life. (Probably more so than it should.) So, why is it on my list?

Now, I also thought it was relevant (before I mark it a “WORTH DOING!” and say goodbye) to mention a tattoo that I decided on during an epiphany I had the other day (less of an epiphany- more of a revolation) I’m getting a tattoo that says “Love;” Yes, love semicolon. Because in literature a semicolon is to be used sparingly, as should the gift of love. I shouldn’t give my whole heart to everyone I meet.

I should learn to find that gr(e/a)y area. I deserve some love for myself.

Somehow it’s all about that warm tingle when everything is just perfectly right. That I’m currently single doesn’t mean that love lack virtues - it has plenty. :) That said I try not to be a mush about love, too much of it has been cheapened by goo. (Not that there’s anything wrong with being gooey. Hmm, maybe I’ve said too much.)

In order to experience love one must take risks.Love can only be experienced by opening your deepest secrets and fears to the one you are falling in love with.If this person respects your inner truths and protects them then you have just taken a risk well worth it and love will grow stronger as time goes by.But if this person exposes and exploits your most trusted information then you can be destroyed and not just in the literal sense!

Been there and can say that I’ve loved, lost and or chickened out and tossed away love. It’s not for the faint of heart or the fair weathered folk. Which isn’t really true. It’s for us all to experience, whether we leave something of value within the other is the key.

Did you love your other good enough? Or are you feeling like you’ve cheated/jipped/skimmped on the goods with someone?