I signed up for 43Things. I read about it online somewhere. I remember being VERY excited about it when I first discovered it. I told coworkers about it because I thought it was so cool to be able to track your goals in this way.

A few things have changed on the site over the 3 years, but I’m very happy with where it is today. And I find myself a more active participant now than ever.

The folks who frequent 43T are so warm and supportive and encouraging – who wouldn’t want to take advantage of that? I think it’s a great community and I’m happy to be a part of it.

Ops a mistake! I was checking my page and this year is going to be just my second one, so, I will give up on this goal for (at least) now. I will come back next year, though. Blame on spring time :P

3 years here? Yes! When? June 20th :)

I don’t even remember how I came across the site – just surfing around to interesting places probably. I’m so glad I did & I’m so glad I stayed. I’ve enjoyed many interesting conversations, attended some wacky parties, played a prank or two…. even got a few things checked off of my list.

The best thing about 43T is the wide range of people I’ve “met” on here – people from all over world; young, old & in between; religious or not; writers, engineers, coaches, health care workers, graduate students, etc, etc, etc….; straight & gay; conservative, liberal, libertarian, middle of the road; black, white, asian, hispanic, mixed race; athletes & those struggling with weight or health issues; goal oriented achievers & spontaneous will of the wisps;

I think it is so important to bring back civilized discourse – I’m tired of people in the real world talking past each other without listening politely or simply ranting without the give and take of discussion. Thank you 43T for hosting a community that provides a wonderful place for so many dissimilar people to intersect and interact.

My husband introduced me to the site—& was amused to see that as he was gradually turning his attention elsewhere, I became increasingly involved. Keeping a list of my goals in a place where I can post updates on them, & get so much support in the process, has been very fruitful for me.

I love being here, & so many of you have become my good friends! Yay for all of us!

(The image is my attempt to deny Chicago’s current wintry weather. Heehee!)

I was subscribed to some email newsletter that had an article about the site the same day as I saw a print article about it. I decided to check it out, and added a dozen or so goals. I was capitalizing things differently than others were in their goals, and promptly forgot about the site.

A few months later I got a message from a woman in Germany asking me if I was the same Todd that had visited a Swiss chalet back in the 80s. She’d found me on 43. I politely told her I wasn’t, but that prompted me to revisit the site and I’ve been active ever since.

During those next few months I attended Des’s costume party where I stained her carpet and moved the couch to hide the stain. At that same party I met Heavee for the first time. I became friends with Cathibeth during those months, and helped Chuq win a race to a certain cheer level. I had only been active for about four months and was so thankful to those who helped me hit 1000 cheers by Christmas since at that point you could only cheer goals, and later entries.

Over the course of the next year I found myself writing comments of support to others, encouraging them to achieve and pointing out their successes. The year after that I spent a lot of time creating birthday goals and giving birthday wishes based on people’s lists. I also attended a New York City meet where I met people I already subscribed to (Segsy, Bookish, JudithKD, Mary Hawkins) as well as people I’d never encountered but now wanted to get to know (HobokenMartha, tlong, hollyhollyoxenfree). I repeated this scenario with the October Chicago meet. Additionally I made a point to meet 43ers on various travels including Heavee in Denver, SBedsaul in Kansas and YRush in Ohio. Lots of people have received postcards from me too as I support them in their state postcard goals. I also participated in the card exchanges, creating 43 Themed cards to send out.

Things have changed here over the last few years. The addition of Neighborhood Watch has created opportunities for it to be abused and has resulted in people being deleted who were once vital parts of this site. Additionally, people have deleted on their own, creating voids in conversations where you can see the comments of people who remain but no longer see what they were reacting to. I miss some of these people dearly, and actually have stayed in touch with some of them off-site.

So why do I continue to use it? I use it to continue to interact with others, encouraging them to work toward completion of their goals. It’s an outlet for me that way, more than a place where I come to work on my own goals. Sure, I work on my goals along the way, but to me it’s more about helping others than helping myself. I’ve got the internal motivation to do what I need to do. Besides, I can’t let Doris catch up to me in cheers.

I didn’t realize I joined on St. Patrick’s Day. In fact, I don’t remember how I came to be here at all. I suspect I read about this place on a blog because I followed a lot of blogs back then.

I think my first goal was “Photograph all of the state capitol buildings.” Or it could have been “Get a Blue Dog painting, lithograph or print.” Those are big ones. They’re still on my list.

In the beginning, I was extremely active. That was back in the days when there was no 43 Places. No 43 People. Back in the days when you could only cheer goals (not entries or comments). There was a paradox… the site helped me get things done, but at times, the site was the thing that kept me too busy to get things done.

When 43 People came online, I was one of those who opted out. I didn’t like the tagging feature. I was insecure. I compared my tags to others, and found out how I rated. I opted back in later when all the hubbub died down.

Then one day, I opted out again because I wanted to shut off the messaging feature. When I opted back in, all my 43 People entries were gone. And worse—all my subscriptions were gone… those I’d subscribed to, and those subscribed to me. I had well over 100 of both. Then I had none. Strange days.

I once called 43 Things my healing place. I got through the deepest depression of my life by working through a self help book and writing about it here.

I found out about National Solo Album Month (NaSoAlMo) here because of Robot Todd G. That got me out of my songwriting slump and helped me find more joy than I ever expected.

Anyone remember the time I went on vacation and ran my webcam from vacation spots? That was fun. I’d like to do that again sometime.

So thanks for being non-judgmental. Thanks for helping me through a tough time. Thanks for encouraging me to make that phone call. Thanks for helping me make the wrong turns that turned out right. Thanks for taking up for me when I needed it. Yeah… Thanks. :)

and then I made a couple of friends: Cathibeth and UncleMonkey (aka map guy in texas)...and I kept making friends, I kept learning….

Somehow 43t became the best friend(s) I’d ever had and more of a family than I’ve ever had too. I have something (myself) I bring here that’s valued, and I get something I value a lot.

I like it because I can be all the things that I am. I can talk about childhood stuff, celebrate my victories, grouse, encourage, tease, flirt, preach; i.e., I can generally be the human being I am. As long as I don’t stalk or otherwise really offend someone too much, that’s ok. For me that’s a huge gift!

jkd

My third anniversary is coming up in just over a month!

I don’t have time to write a long essay here, so I’ll just say 43Things has been a lovely, warm place to muse on the ways I want to grow, & on the desires of my heart, & then to figure out the steps I need to take to move in those directions, & to record progress, setbacks, failures, achievements . . .

& all in an atmosphere of warmth, caring, support, ideas, encouragement, questions & answers, hope, nudges/reminders/prodding, & fun!

I would say 43Things is a greenhouse for growth.

and had decided that 43T is an almost magical mix of elements that make it work for me.

One part is the public commitment to a goal. I really really really HATE to “give up” on something. So I consider it before I put it on the list, and then I work hard to make it happen.

The other part, the really magic part, is the connection to other people who are also working on their goals. I’ve made some dear friends here, and this builds into my motivation: I want to succeed for them and with them and enjoy our successes and what we learn along the way.

Well, I’d been thinking all this, and then I log on here and oh my gosh, Mahinui and Flirt had cooked up a tiki party to celebrate my almost-done thesis! So there you go, Exhibit A.

The big thing for me has been that I’ve been engaged in a huge task over the past few years, this rabbinical school thing, and it has taught me a lot of things about myself. One thing I truly didn’t know six years ago was how lonely I could get, living far from my two sons and my best friend (now sweetie) Catattack. I first logged on here one evening when I couldn’t stand to be by myself and was just looking for distraction on the Net. There was a rather icky little piece in salon.com, and I thought, gee, can it be that bad? And checked it out. The rest is history.

I know it sounds silly, but I don’t know I’d have been able to hang in on this long-term project had I not been able to check in here at any crazy hour to look for a little encouragement, and to be reminded that I’m not the only person in the world working on a challenge or dealing with troublesome feelings.

Thank you all so much for making your lists, and having silly avatar games, and telling what it is really like to struggle along the road to goals that mean a lot to you. I know I’m a better person for having spent time here.