drop toxic relationships

...to people who put me down to play to their own insecurities, try to manipulate and control me, covertly intimidate and generally make me feel like crap. Time to make some changes. I know my buttons, I know myself and now I know all about manipulation techniques. Try it again. Please. Just so I can watch you scramble and stumble over your words when I call you out.

thank YOU :p

There are only a couple of people in my life right now that kind of qualify as toxic, but they drive me crazy.

I can’t put my finger on it exactly but one person seems to enjoy whenever I’m not doing well because it makes her feel better about her own failures; she latches onto my weaknesses to feed her strengths and I end up feeling drained and terrible about myself afterwards.

Another is such a bald-faced, aggressive, ambitious social climber that it makes me want to claw out my eyeballs. I find myself constantly on guard around him because I feel like some kind of a rung in his social ladder, secretly despising him but also a bit flattered. He doesn’t respect personal boundaries and has crossed the line many, many times and I don’t feel like I can be myself around him. Also a big drain, but I have distanced myself quite a bit already, which is good.

In any case, it’s awful. If I do decide to keep these people in my life, I am going to have to figure out ways to distance myself.

Is it possible to end a toxic friendship with a someone you’ll run into a lot?

I have gotten rid of a lot of toxic people from the past, but I know I will always run into people who are bad for me. It’s a goal I won’t achieve until I’m dead, probably! But it’s a good reminder.

i really need to learn to do this. i have a huge problem with sticking. and trying to make things work when i shouldnt and always giving someone the benefit of the doubt, making excuses for them, and going back to unhealthy relationships even when i know that if it didnt work the first time, things probably arent going to change too much. i dont make a habit of going out with REALLY bad guys but i definitely dont get the appreciation or respect that i deserve either.Right now, im waiting for the RIGHT man to come along but if he doesnt hurry up, i know me, i’ll probably end up back with an ex.

Decided to combine all my similar goals in to one goal…

i finally thought that i had a group of women around me who are positive and grown and understand my needs and strengths and i’m faced with having to work thorugh the issues again.

i feel hurt and angry and used and alone…to be honest i’m faced with the reality of the friendships that have ended each and every day and its like being cut over and over again! i feel abandoned and this coming on the heals of learning that my one feeling from childhood was abandonment issues. i honestly don’t know how to grow and i feel like people keep leaving because of how i am. clearly its me!!!

I’ve been making a mental list over the past few days of pople in my life and the purpose they serve. With some friends, it’s easy to identify why the relationship is valuable and important. With others, it’s more difficult. But I realized with one particularly difficult, narcissistic friend, that one of the roles she plays is to inspire me to work harder, NOT because she is supportive of my endeavors, but because she is so unsupportive (we have similar goals) that it makes me strive to be better and more productive than her. Which, I admit, isn’t the most positive association to have with a friendship. But she’s basically cut off the friendship anyway (didn’t invite me to her going away party before she moved to a new city)—I think, sadly, out of a bizarre, unfounded jealousy, rather than anything to do with me or my treatment of her.

i’m glad i did it but at the same time, i feel so drained from it! oh well, i’m sure i was actually more drained before but just hid it well, now at least i’m more open about what’s going on!