Organize & follow through with a fundraiser to make a significant donation to my friend & manicurist.

I am grateful for the opportunity and the ability to help Dee when she needed me.

I wish that things would have turned out differently. I wish she was still here. I wish she could have gotten better.

and everyone came to my house afterwards for sandwiches etc. Dee’s Mom didn’t want alcohol there which I was O.K. with, it didn’t matter to me one way or another, so I only had soda and water available, but of course people brought beer and were slammin’ them right in front of Dee’s Mom.

Then came the real fun stuff . . . gossiping, back stabbing, one uping each other (who was a better friend, who took better care of her while she was sick, blah blah blah) and of course the big one . . . which greedy vulture deserves to have what of Dee’s stuff. People where lobbying Dee’s Mom like crazy. I was so not believing this, yet I was seeing it!!!

So today I had 43+ assholes at my house.

I miss Dee.

P.S. the memorial service was actually very very nice.

Her Mom called and told me that Dee just slipped away around 7:00 this morning.

She was in and out of a deep deep sleep all week and this morning was the final sleep.

Her funeral is Wednesday and we will have the lunch after the funeral at my house.

Cancer Sucks . . . .

as now Mike and I are definately going to host Dee’s Birthday Party at our home on Sunday, April 27. Our home is much more condusive to large crowds than Dee’s townhouse. Parking is limited at her town house and we have the entire freakin’ street. She only has a small patio and an already crowded townhouse, we have a huge yard, the pool, two covered patios and a large kitchen and family room. It just makes more sense to have the party here and Dee’s Mom won’t have clean up afterwards, she can just take Dee home.

I am so happy that we can do this for her. I am meeting with Dee’s Mom tomorrow (and Dee) to figure out preliminary details.

I was finally able to see Dee this morning. No one can see her if they are not 100% healthy as her immune system is so depleted from the Chemo and the radiation treatments.

She had an MRI a short while ago to determine the progress her body is making. She told me today that the spots on her lungs have gotten bigger, there is a new spot on her liver and the tumor on her spine which has her in the wheel chair is for the most part unchanged. It seems that her doctor(s) are of the opinion that she needn’t take the chemo any longer if she doesn’t want too . . . it seems they are giving up. I think she said that the one doctor said . . . “I really don’t know why you are continuing with this.” Dee is thinking now what exactly she wants to do. She said that part of her wants to try some experimental treatments and part of her wants to say the hell with it and just take out a loan and go on a cruise with her Mom and be done with it. I told her she needed to fight . . . to try the experimental treatments . . . just keep fighting, but really that is the voice of a person who doesn’t want to loose their friend. I am not sitting in that wheel chair with a catheter bag and more tumors growing inside me. I feel very sad. No amount of tamales is going to help I don’t think. I just need to accept whatever decision she makes and that is that.

Her birthday is April 27. Her sister’s birthday is also on April 27. Charlene was born on Dee’s 3rd birthday. Her Mom wants to have an open house or something like that for her birthday, but they live in a townhouse and have 4 Schnoodle puppies running around. Parking is also an issue there.

I suggested that she have the open house/party at my house. I only live about 3 miles from Dee and my house is much more condusive to a crowd than her townhouse. Mike said O.K. as well.

I hope they take me up on my offer.

Cancer sucks.

that we made at the end of October and all funds have been given to Dee. I have to believe that it has helped her quite a bit as she is now totally unable to work. She has radiation several times a week and Chemo one or two times a week (I can’t remember which) I just know that an ambulette comes for her everyday and she goes off to the hosptal to get her treatments and then they bring her back exhausted every afternoon. Her Mom has been living at her house now and takes care of her and a hospice nurse comes in several times a week for different tasks.

Our goal was to make and sell 60 dozen tamales, however, on the day of the tamale preparation, we ran out of masa so we had to quit at the 40 dozen. I still have the tamale meat and chili to complete the other 20 dozen (in my freezer), however, Diana has been quite busy and has not been able to schedule another day with me to finish off the project.

I have spoken with her about this as I feel it is very important to complete the goal. I feel that I can do everything except get the masa ready. I watched her very carefully on the day we made the other 40 and I think that I can do this by myself. All I need is for Diana to stop by and show me how to get the masa ready. She has agreed to do this, so now I just have to pick a day and hopefully get the show on the road here. I feel badly that I didn’t get this done earlier, but I will get it done.

3 down . . . 57 +/- to go. It’s going to be a long day!!!

and are cooling before being bagged up. They taste great!!! (Yes, we HAD to taste test them . . . I mean really, WE HAD TOO!!!)

decided to give masa spreading a shot. I will have to say that he is not quite as smooth as Diana is . . . but he still rocks in my opinion!!!

Life guard Mike became “Tamalito Mike” and helped Diana refill, the masa bowl.

P.S. I have to add this foot note. When I was looking at this picture, I noticed that there as the folgers container in the picture. I do not drink folgers. I get my coffee fresh and grind the beans everyday. Diana’s Mom sent the Folgers container over for us to put the money in for the sale of the tamales. It’s our “cash register”.