Dear 43 Things Users,

10 years after introducing 43 Things to the world, we have decided we have met our last goal: completing the incredible experience that has been 43 Things. Please join us in giving one last cheer to all the folks who have shared their goals with the world, as well as all the people who have worked at The Robot Co-op to build this incredible website. We won a Webby Award, published a book, and brought happiness to a lot of people.

Starting today, 43 Things users can export their goals and entries from the site. Starting August 15, we will make the site “read only”. 43 Things users will still be able to view the site and export their content, but we won’t be taking any new content from users. We hope to leave the site up for folks to see and download their content until the end of the year. Ending on New Year’s Eve takes us full circle.

It has been a long ride (one of our original goals was to "build a company that lasts at least 2 years” - we beat that one!) While we wish the site could live on, it has suffered from a number of challenges - changes in how people use the site, the advertising industry, and how search engines view the site. We wish the outcome was different – but we’ve always been realistic about when our goals are met and when they aren't.

As of today, you will be able to download your goals and entries. See more about that on the FAQ page. Thanks for 10 great years of goal-setting and achieving.

- The Robots.

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Horatiusday 16

20 days until no one can post here anymore. don’t know about you guys, but this is more than enough time to get one more awesome streak in. so i am t-minus 19 starting today. i am inviting some of the lurkers out there to join me! 2 days ago


change13Update 2 weeks

Wow the last time I posted on here was in March, yet i still continue to battle, today will be two weeks but both yesterday and today I woke up and went to sleep with that being the only thing on my mind. I’m at work and surfing the net. I tell myself stop but somehow find myself just wanting to stumble. Pray for me guys, I don’t want to fall. 1 week ago


fyrebird 3 weeks ago


ryanosborne55Day-1

Day-1 :) 4 weeks ago


Horatiusday 61!

god did something to my heart last night. i feel… cleansed and refreshed. wow what a beautiful day yesterday! the holy spirit eradicated my temptations, and replaced them with a desire to be with him instead. 1 month ago


ryanosborne55Day-0

I will begin this again :) 1 month ago


Horatiusas bad as it gets...

was glued to my bed, shivering like an addict last night. first wave eventually got me sitting at my computer 4AM so that i could seek out a sexy picture i caught a glimpse of like five days ago lol. i found it, looked at it for a moment, came to my senses somehow, and went back to bed.

two more waves after that – each equally bad.

really, it’s my subconscious triggering a heightened arousal state in me, and by the time i wake up, my conscious self is barely in control of the situation. for instance, in between sleeping and waking, i’ll start massaging myself down there until i have a full on boner. then when i wake up, i have to calm myself down. which i eventually figured i should do, and went to the bathroom to let my boner disappear. then i am better equipped to make a decision, but generally not until after.

only thing that saved me in the end, and especially after the third wave, was the inconvenience and fear of having to get up and go to the computer.

that, and the memory of the crucifixion. there’s this scene in the passion of the christ where the roman soldiers, instead of picking up the exhausted and battered Jesus and dragging him to the cross, instead mockingly ask, and wait for him to do it himself.

during my last huge streak, i failed on the morning of the 50th day. and even though there was no porn then or for a long time afterwards, i eventually slipped back into that self-destructive habit. this time around, i almost fail on the 60th day. sure that’s better, but it’s not enough. not nearly. gentlemen, i will not go back to where i was a year ago. i refuse. i must press on.

during the roughest parts i must remember that it can’t get any worse, but only better.

next time i wake up aroused or with my hands on my dick, i will use common sense, go into the other room, take a leak if i must, and wait for my junk to fully shrink. i can’t make good decisions aroused like that.

t minus three days until i give up private internet for at least six months. i can hold out til then. there is no option here—i absolutely must.

battle log for Saturday, June 21st:

4AM
LWW

one loss for looking at the sexy pick, and two wins for coming back to my senses and going back to bed

6AM
WWWW
i don’t even remember here… i was completely out of control.

7AM
WWW

can’t take credit for these victories… it was god, chance and riding on the momentum of earlier victories. and not being quite yet insane enough to go through with the deed, even though i was fantasizing about it quite a bit. only memory of the crucifixion gave me strength. to look at Jesus’ brutalized body and know that my sin was upon him. 1 month ago


Horatiusday 57

wet dream last night. didn’t dream anything when it happened. this is good news. must be on my guard today, because of fatigue and the “teaser” my brain got last night. can make my brain want more. but that’s not gonna happen, of course. saw something very provocative on facebook yesterday. in years, i haven’t seen anything on facebook. then yesterday, in the middle of a huge, life-changing streak, i see something. and right before i’m about to get rid of internet. satan wants me.

but i see these enticing things like a glazed donut filled with cyanide. don’t touch that shit.

anyway… that picture at the top… that’s gotta be my attitude when i am faced with temptation. unless i am ruthless, then i will fail. and this means being my own drill instructor at times, because it is easy to get soft and forget.

other than that, it’s all God. thank you Lord for protecting me, and for the inevitable victories to come. I know that because of you, I will not be masturbating again. 1 month ago


Horatiusbattle log for june week 3/4

Sun, 6-15
WW

Mon
W

Tues
W

Wed

Thurs

Fri

Sat 1 month ago


Horatiusday 54

“Don’t judge each day by the harvest you reap, but by the seeds you plant.”
- Robert Louis Stevenson 1 month ago


Horatiusafter action report for Saturday, June 14th

no temptations. a certain feeling of fatigue and restlessness came over me, but no actual temptation. i believe that my body is beginning to go through changes that will be permanent if i keep it up right now. let’s say… for the next 10-20 days.

tricky dreams, though. an evil spirit i contracted about two years ago from porn use tried to manipulate my dreams again last night. tried to trick my mind into making them sexual, so that he could then in turn feed off of my energy. but it’s getting tougher for him, since thoughts of porn and sexual fantasy no longer fill my subconscious mind. in fact, the last time i dreamed about something overtly sexual or related to porn must have been over five weeks ago. don’t get me wrong – thoughts of nude body parts bubble to the surface from time to time, but i tend to ignore them. not just in my dreams, but upon waking as well. i also understand what my mind is trying to tell me by these images – that i want real connection, and love.

so yeah… this evil spirit will come around, try to manipulate my dreams into something sexual, fails, and i, upon waking, might feel or see him – generally, on my face. humping it. trying to rattle me. it’s a weird and almost nonsensical experience but i must report things as they are.

he can’t feed off of me anymore, and he can’t manipulate me either, like he used to. it’s making him upset.

in ancient Hebrew, the word for anointing could also mean fatness – fatness of soul. Ha! the Lord has been making me so fat, that the usual yokes that the enemy has been trying to slip around my neck aren’t fitting anymore.

And i wish i could take credit for this, but really, it hasn’t been that difficult. part of me cringes at the thought of saying this, but it’s true – it’s been the blessing and anointing of God that has finally begun to eradicate what was once a towering stronghold in my life. and indeed – it will be as powder underneath my feet, and satan will afflict me from within myself no more.

“A house divided against itself cannot stand.”

other than that, i am also trying out intermittent fasting – slowly working my way up to sixteen hour daily fasts. they help, guys. mine go from about midnight to 4PM. caffeine helps to curb the appetite, and every time i get hungry, i just drink water. i feel better. it might sound counterintuitive, but fasting in this manner causes you to enjoy plainer food more. so it gets easier to diet. i stay away from all junk food. this, i believe, is key in helping to control cravings. also, i exercise. this helps too. i don’t say these things to brag, but for instruction – doing them will help!

meditating on healing scriptures and taking communion is probably, among other things, what healed me, so that i have gone from less responsive to almost nonresponsive to cues to jack off.

“i am dead to sin…” Paul said. this means that you behave as if it’s not even there anymore. Like a woman looking at sexual cues that are intended for a man – while driving to work, she doesn’t even notice them.

”... but alive to God in Jesus.” 1 month ago


Horatiusday 53

“The game of life is not so much in holding a good hand as playing a poor hand well.”
- H.T. Leslie 1 month ago


Horatiusday 52

man my balls hurt. no matter… i have a feeling that the enemy’s in for a serious ass kicking tonight. the greater the challenge, the greater the opportunity. it’s just like working out at the gym – you put your body under strain, and it inevitably adapts to the challenge. end of story. 1 month ago


FreedomAwaits20Untitled

I haven’t posted on this website for a while. I was able to abstain from the habit for quite some time, unfortunately however, the seriousness of this habit escaped from my mind and I ended up engaging in it after foolishly thinking it would be okay. The good news however is that I now know I have the strength to give up this habit but can lack the motivation sometimes. Soooo.. I am back and plan on staying longer on the site as members’ posts keep me in tune with the reality of this habit. So here goes day 1.
minor goal = 3 days
major goal = 1 week 1 month ago


Horatiustotal victory

hello gentlemen of 43,

what’s up? as of today, i am technically beating my record of 50 days by several hours.

i am never looking back. and by the grace of god alone, i will never fail again. have had a lot of anger these days… yesterday especially. i felt some temptation come over me, but then at the thought of failure, and the thought of weakness, i was overcome with anger. “there’s just no f*cking way…” i quietly mumbled to myself, and i could feel my fist clenching and my heart pounding at the thought of utterly crushing this hated enemy forever.

you really have to hate this to beat it… you really do. the only reason you don’t is because you’ve forgotten who you are.

like Popeye, you gotta no-nonsense, force-feed yourself that spinach if you want the strength.

i am this far because something got decreed from above over my life… it’s beyond my control.

“Let a righteous man strike me – that is a kindness; let him rebuke me – that is oil on my head. My head will not refuse it, for my prayer will still be against the deeds of evildoers.”

I will steamroll through the next ten days… no mercy will be given to the enemy. 1 month ago


Horatiusbattle log for June week 2/4

Sun, 6-8
WWW

Mon
W

Tues
W

Wed

Thurs

Fri
WW

Sat

note: will be editing in updates until the week ends

here’s an empty form that anyone can copy and paste for their own use:

Sun, 6-8

Mon

Tues

Wed

Thurs

Fri

Sat 1 month ago


Horatiusbattle log for June week 1/4

Sun, 6-1

Mon
WW

Tues
W

Wed

Thurs

Fri
WWW

Sat 1 month ago


Heisenberg24My Story

I first discovered masturbation after viewing an inappropriate video on the internet at the age of either 12 or 13. Not knowing it was wrong, I continued to commit this sin. One day, though, I was told it was wrong and it took a little while to kick the addiction. I reached out to a religious leader who helped me stop masturbating and to achieve forgiveness.

I’ve done pretty well up until about a year ago. I’m 18 now. In May of 2013 I was officially diagnosed with depression. I have been on a medication called Citalopram since then. I was taking 20 milligrams a day, a couple weeks ago I was upped to 40 milligrams per day.

Now this medication does wonders for me, it makes me happier, more pleasant, and keeps me motivated. But it has 2 pretty difficult negatives. One is it makes me dreadfully tired. I work my way around this pretty easily, though. The second is bad. This medication also makes me desensitized to many situations and conditions.

For example, my entire first 11 years of schooling I had wonderful grades. The last part of junior and all of senior year they went from A’s and B’s to C’s and D’s because the medication makes me not care.

I used to care about messing up but I no longer do. I know it is wrong. The longest I’ve gone since the pills is 49 days. Today I am on day 0.

I am so sick of screwing up. I am so sick of having to face God on my knees every night and recounting to him the same exact sin I continue committing day after day after day. I have a goal to make it at least 50 days. I know for a fact I can do it.

Thanks for listening. This is a wonderful website and already feel it helping me. 2 months ago


Heisenberg24 2 months ago


Horatiusmy intentions

day 24. had a wet dream this morning, though what i dreamed wasn’t too graphic (thank God…)

normally i’d be on the lookout about failing, but there’s no fucking way that’s happening. anyway… i am here to state my intentions, and to remind myself of them as well. beginning on Monday, and what i think is a God send, i will be going on vacation for one week. that will be a lovely boost to 34 days clean.

other than this, i’m tired of beating around the bush and have declared war on my caffeine addiction. i read a motivational poster that said: “are you tired of starting over? then stop giving up.” well my goodness, how pertinent.

so the weaning off process began today, and will be complete by the 30th. and then after that, one month no caffeine whatsoever. it should be an interesting month.

now of course there’s going to be that morning slump, so i plan on rudely interrupting it with a cold shower. i had planned this many times in the past and never got around to it, but no more bullshit excuses. this just has to get done. no more staring at obstacles i should have overcome months ago. time to move on. but in spite of this, everything is right on schedule. God – thank goodness – has everything under control. now may i look to Him, and be glad. and look towards my glorious future, and be thankful.

that which has held me captive no longer will. like the Count of Monte Cristo who finally escaped from prison, I too will be a free man!

my next post will be on Tuesday, the 27th. on this day i will write: “day 35!”

heh! that will be a good day.

anyway, gentlemen, please note that abstinence is celebration – a celebration of the good life now made available to you by your decision. 2 months ago


Ivan Gefen5 Reasons to Quit This Related Porn Habit.

1. Misappropriation of nude images has led to suicides to escape harassment on social media.
2. Body norms propagate eating disorders, and death.
3. Models and propagates male sexual aggression
4. Denies authentic personal sexual desire
5. Creates demand for crime, human trafficking, drugs, prostitution.

http://tedxtalks.ted.com/video/Why-I-Stopped-Watching-Porn-Ran;search%3Atag%3A%22israel%22 2 months ago


Ivan Gefen 4 years ago


k4170

k4170 3 years ago


freshstart123Day 4

Everything is fine. I have been trying to abstain for the last couple of weeks again. But this is the time I will finally break free of this addiction. I have practically not watched any porn since the first of March because I accidentally formatted my hard drive. After that I immediately made the decision to never watch it again and I’ve installed a porn filter. Feels really good. Now the only thing left is never mb again. I think the last time I went 30 days was in 2010 or so when I had my first account here “itreallyisme”. I’m also on wetdreamforum under the name “mbfree” and on nofap.org with the same username. Al of these communities really support me, especially wetdreamforum (mainly the chatroom), but of course you still need to do it yourself. I hope that one day this community will be as busy as it was a few years ago. Good luck to everyone! 3 months ago


freshstart123Day 3

I will post some more soon. 3 months ago


Horatiusday 4 - woohoo!!

today i woke up feeling absolutely golden and empowered. yesterday evening i felt like crap. even after running very intensely on the treadmill, my brain was still whining for more. for… rest. the good news is, i took that message literally and dozed off during my prayers.

but why do i feel so good? because yesterday after my nap i sought the lord one fifteen minute session at a time.

then a great peace came over me.

it adds up, y’know? those tiny little decisions..

either for good, or ill. in every moment, it’s your choice.

but true freedom is the accumulated affect of choices rightly made.

i dare you – in this moment – to write down five tiny things you can do right now, and then do them.

be it order your desk, drink a glass of water, write out of list of ten things you’re thankful for, or ten minutes of prayer.

can’t do ten minutes? then do five.
maybe your challenge for today is to just go outside and smile.

sit up straight! stop communicating defeat to your body.

and then after you do those five tiny things, do five more. follow your instincts – you don’t even have to write anything down.

but! at the end of the day, you definitely should write down everything you did, and thank God that you were able to do it.

i’ve always heard: baby steps to get out of a depression.

but i say: baby steps always!

gentlemen, we are always so focused on what we don’t have control over that we end up neglecting what we do have control over! and then we feel like crap, which then in turn hinders us more and more to do what we must do. it’s a vicious cycle. 3 months ago


Horatiusanother post

about three months ago, FreedomAwaits20 posted about how his friend lost all hope of ever quitting. then someone told his friend that before you can learn to run, you must first learn to crawl, and so on. this being the case, by consistently observing the tinier disciplines it can quickly follow that one will be able to observe the bigger disciplines as well. so the tinier stuff eventually snowballs into the bigger stuff, and a better future begins to take shape.

but i’ve noticed that not only can this result in a better future in the long run, but in the short run as well. so many days have started off totally crappy in which i didn’t even want to get out of bed, but just by exerting control in the tiny things i eventually gained control in the big things later on. a crappy day turned amazing one tiny decision at a time. for one man, the big battle is going to the mirror, saying to himself, “today’s gonna be a good day!” and then brushing his teeth, while for another it’s making that difficult call he doesn’t want to make.

it all depends on where you are. walking outside when you are in the depths and throes of temptation is the hardest battle you will ever face. normally, it’s easy as pie.

you just blazed through a 76 day streak, but now just failed. totally demoralized the next day, you don’t even want to get out of bed. you felt utterly glorious burning through unprecedented territory yesterday, but now you’ve lost the will to fight. but if you would just get up now and do the little good you can do, then one tiny decision at a time you will inevitably take back control of the situation. later on, you realize how insane it was of you to discount 76 days of perfection over one failure. and then from that place of warped foolishness, to almost give up entirely. (thereby squandering all 76 days of progress)

which is why i devised the following method to account for wins and losses in this war against addiction. for those who don’t know, a win would be that occasion when i am tempted to act out, but choose not to.

i’ll go ahead then and share with you my stats since Sunday:
Sunday, day 13
0

Monday, day 0
W
L
L
L

Tuesday, day 0
L
L

Wednesday, day 1
0

Thursday, day 2
0

first off, you’ll notice with this setup that it immediately exposes binges. so after my first failure you’ll notice i had four opportunities stretched over the course of two days to turn things around, but i chose not to. that’s four more battles lost, and there’s no excuse for that.

second, it gives credit where credit is due. sure you have might have just lost a battle against temptation, but if you win this battle then you’re doing better! and if you win the next 3-4 battles then that’s an 80 percent success rate in this war against addiction.

third, it helps one to see that this war is won as much one decision at a time as it is one day at a time.

and of course, the decisions we make off the battlefield of temptation do as much (if not more) to win the war as do the decisions we make on the battlefield.

so, how do we record those? well, borrowing from the primary principle of Kaizen (that tiny improvements add up to big improvements over time), yesterday after such a catastrophic series of failures i resolved to hold myself accountable not just to the big things (such as losing weight and beating this addiction), but even more so to the tiny things.

that is to say, i would do the tiny disciplines enough to actually make a difference. very frequently people will observe the small things, but not enough to actually get the ball rolling, either in the day or in their lives.

they will brush their teeth and clean their room for instance, but then they stop there and for the rest of the day do very little. i’ve been guilty of this all my life.

so anyway all i did yesterday was just write down every tiny little positive thing i either did, or could do.

be it cleaning my room, praying fifteen minutes extra, waking up on time or drinking extra water, i wrote it down.

and of course, all that fit into a plan for how i wanted the day to turn out.

and guess what? starting with the tiny took a day that potentially might have been either very shitty or rather ordinary, and instead made it extraordinary.

i ended up praying, for instance, much longer than i normally would have.

in the spirit of taking baby steps, i figured i’d set a timer for fifteen minutes, pray, and then if i was tired i would listen either to scripture or to some prayers.

and then i got clever about how else to make it manageable, such as going to pray in the shower.

it was all very cool, and all by exerting my focus and control on one tiny space at time

but not only this, but also believing that each little battle matters.

you see, we won’t go that extra mile when we don’t think it matters

we just think, “oh, what’s brushing my teeth right now gonna matter, anyway? what’s reading an extra fifteen minutes gonna matter, anyway? what’s doing that extra set gonna matter, anyway?”

a lot more than you think. and this is what Kaizen teaches.

it trains you to bypass the fear and overwhelm response by using time not as your enemy, but as your best friend.

and the accumulated effect will not just be better days, but a better life.

to quote again the conclusions of Socrates:

“Excellence is an art won by training and habituation:

we do not act rightly because we have virtue or excellence, but we rather have these because we have acted rightly;

‘these virtues are formed in man by his doing the actions’; we are what we repeatedly do.

Excellence, then, is not an act but a habit:

‘the good of man is a working of the soul in the way of excellence in a complete life…

for as it is not one swallow or one fine day that makes a spring,

so it is not one day or a short time that makes a man blessed and happy’”

so! that is all i can write for now.

for those brothers of mine who have encouraged me, thank you! i hope to get back to you guys soon.

hopefully, things will begin to pick up on this forum… i believe that they will.

oh yeah! the cascade of failures i experienced… i’ll tell you why, and what i can do to prevent that from ever happening again.

that’s right! you heard me! something THAT bad will never happen again! it’s inexcusable, and i know for a fact that i can do better, and in fact have.

i made a poor lifestyle choice for that day: i was inside all day, and procrastinated going running.

i made such a big deal about going running that i never did it. and that’s where i went wrong – you see, all i needed to do was make the challenge easier and just go outside for a walk.

in fact, just by doing that, it might have turned into actually running.

so… that was part of the reason i failed. the other part is that i didn’t implement any of the strategies i had talked about here on this forum. so this time around, i will make sure that i do. i will plan it, visualize it and rehearse it. and then i will talk about it here.

this addiction is very closely linked to my poor lifestyle choices. by correcting how i live and think, i will have to fight fewer battles and when i do fight, i will be better equipped to win each and every one of them.

i mean i know myself, guys. and i know the chain reaction of events that leads either to a very difficult battle, or outright failure.

so! whenever i am doing something seemingly unrelated, such as not going outside, i can post here about and ideally get myself moving in the right direction.

the moral here is that the battle begins long before the actual battle. identify your weak points.

god bless. 3 months ago


Sir Invictus (Estel)It is time!

Hey guys, I come here after a long time, and glad to see some of us are still posting, keeping this dead forum alive, loved to read Horatius’s wise words.

I have been doing good. In fact, for the first time, I now have control over everything. Don’t know what day is it as I don’t write here, but sometimes, it doesn’t matter. I know One day, we will remember this battle, and think of it as a bad dream.

My life is more disciplined now. I am pushing my willpower to have everything go my way and I have started tasting success. I have stopped watching porn. this is for the first time, I have taken this decision. In all my long streaks in the past, when extremely tempted, I used to open porn files and close them in few seconds before acting on it. and that is how I used to survive. but it’s all over now. I want to live in reality. I don’t want to lose respect for women. They are life. Though many girls we see around us are evil, these little creatures are beautiful.

THe struggle in my pesonal life is still going on. but I do believe that the world is a beautiful and one day, I will be in the right place.

Keep fighting the good fight guys. This will not only free us from this addiction, but make us a good human being. 3 months ago


Horatiusday 12

hello my scattered brothers! how’s life?? today is my 12th day of freedom from masturbation and porn.

fought another battle last night, but because i played my cards right beforehand it was not a serious one – just a skirmish. a fleeting, waning desire right before i got my prayers in for the evening.

what i’m not happy with however is the wet dream i had last night. rather gross actually, but alas that’s life.

and yet, there’s still some good news in this:

the dream wasn’t that pornographic
for four days i had temptations but didn’t act out on them

so i press on… past today, and into tomorrow.

until then. 3 months ago


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