I need a name for my forth coming series of “web books”, set to debut this summer. I’ve kicked around a few ideas but nothing seems to stick. These manuscripts are basically the background details for events mention in my memoir. This way, I won’t drag down the larger work with excessive details of events, places and things.

I’ll give it some more thought, and make a decision by week’s end. And if not, I’ll continue to brainstorm.

Anyone have any ideas? 1 month ago

“You mentioned you would share your personal experiences in your last post, but what “experiences” are you referring to?”

I do apologize, as I thought I had disclosed said experiences in an earlier post. But I was referring to my brushes with alcoholism and depression. I know those are two very common “afflictions” in our society, and one may thing that each individual experience may not vary much from one person to the next. And if that is your line of thinking, then you’re probably right. What I have to share may not e anything new or different from what someone has already heard or seen, but there is the possibility (and probability) that someone out there has yet to even hear or see those testimonies.

I’m not sharing my experiences in hopes of striking it rich or my 15 minutes of fame. Mainly the reason in doing so is because in the past I’ve received a lot of both praise from current and former sufferers for coming forward and sharing my story, but most importantly, the thanks from those who feel ashamed, troubled or uncertain about revealing or sharing their current experiences with the disorder.

Until I went through both depression and sobriety issues I never could understand why people couldn’t just “snap out if it”. I never thought it would be so hard to at the very least, maintain control over your life. Unfortunately (and thankfully) I have a newfound appreciation, respect and empathy for people who struggle with mental illness and addiction. For the longest time, I too didn’t want to openly discuss my problems because I was afraid of how people would receive me. I was afraid of being labeled, so I kept silent as most troubled people do. But I’ve found so much peace and release from talking about, and sharing what I’ve been through that I feel I could at least give others a medium to openly share their experiences as well. To not feel ashamed, or like an outcast or rejected.

I’m not fool, and I am fully aware that there will be those who will make negative comments and view me through a pessimistic and judgmental lens, and that’s okay. It’s life and I can take it. I’ve been through far worse, so I’m pretty sure I’ll survive a bit of harsh criticism. But I also understand that there are those who cannot take it. That don’t want to be subjugated to other people’s scornful and condescension. It’s for them that I am sharing my story. 1 month ago

Of all the things I’ve wanted to do via 43Things, this is by far one of the most troubling. It’s not that I find it difficult in and of itself to complete. But rather that I have no idea of how to go about doing it.

I’ve always wanted to make a positive difference in people’s lives, whether that was being a physician or a good friend. I wasn’t concerned with celebritism or accolades because at the end of the day, none of that really matters. Not to me anyway. Knowing that I’ve made a difference in someone’s day is just a great a feeling.

So I’ve pondered the number of possible ways I could complete this goal, and none of them have really worked out for me. I thought about starting a motivational speaking seminar in my free time, but considering my schedule is already chock-full of errands and tasks, taking on something new wouldn’t be prudent. I thought about posting motivational videos, but there-in lies the same problem. Time. I know that sounds like an excuse, and you may be right. Actually, as I sit here and type this, I will admit they are excuses. No one said these videos or seminars had to be hours in length. I could record them in brief segments and post them later in the week. Truth of the matter is I’m afraid that pursuing either of these at this time would do more harm than good. I want to be sure I have the adequate amount of time needed to dedicate to this. I don’t want to tell someone I’m doing it to encourage and motivate them, and then only put forth a half-assed attempt.

So it was back to the drawing board, but not for long. I finally decided I would write my experiences and share them via what I’ve been referring to as a “web book” -which is basically posting the manuscript online via a website rather than as a downloadable ebook, PDF, or some other file format. This way, the “book” can be viewed from any device capable of displaying html webpages. It will also save me the trouble from having to format the manuscript to fit different formats. Or so I theorize.

I came up with the idea one evening while working on my memoir. I wanted to divulge more about the experience in the book, but I felt doing so would detract readers from the overall storyline. But I also felt that someone might want to know how and in what ways depression affected my life, and not just that I went through it. In a sense, my web books will offer all of the nitty-gritty background and back story details I wouldn’t be able to depict in the memoir itself.

I’m working on the websites, err web books, as I speak (type), and I’m aiming to have the first post uploaded by Mother’s Day, but it may be as late as June 1st. I have a lot of journals to sort through, and I want to share as many relevant details about my experiences as possible. But I’m sure with the support of friends and 43T members, I’ll meet my deadline. 1 month ago

Any advice I would have is dependent on a number of factors, including the nature of the crisis, the emotions involved, the people and the circumstances. But, one thing I would say is to ask yourself what is at stake. What do you stand to lose from this crisis? And how important are the things which you stand to lose? When dealing with any sort of emotional struggle your first objective should be to prioritize. You have to discern and KNOW what is most important to you. Only then can you begin the healing process.

When I was struggling with depression, it took months before I could make any sort of progress with my healing because I had no idea what it was I wanted. I was too focused on what everyone was thinking about me, how they would react to whatever changes I’d pursue, and I even worried how those changes would affect my existing friendships and relationships. It wasn’t until I sat down and decided what it was that I wanted for myself that I was able to get better. Once I knew what I wanted, I could reverse engineer the methods to get there.

I would also tell you that it is important to have good, solid friends and family members in your corner as you deal with your struggles. One thing I have learned is that it is very difficult to deal with emotions alone because many times our emotions are triggered by other people. Surround yourselves with like-minded individuals whom you TRUST, and KNOW care. When you have a strong support group there is nothing you can’t accomplish. It’s only a matter of how long and when. Not if.

If you’re struggling with your emotions tell someone. Tell someone you can trust. You have to get help from somewhere, and while there are people out there that have “done it on their own”, that doesn’t mean that you have to. And above all else, don’t change because someone says you need to. Do it because you want to. If you don’t want the help for yourself, nothing anyone does for you will matter in the end. You’re the key to your own well being, and once you realize and accept that you want help, everything else will fall into place eventually. 5 months ago

To be fearless does not mean to be without fear. Fearlessness is having the courage to continue living our lives in spite of what we fear. Fear reminds us not only what we have to lose, but also to what we stand to gain. 5 months ago

All my life, I’ve wanted to help people. As a kid I would fantasize about being this wealthy philanthropist, traveling from country to country helping the poor and underprivileged. Fantasy, right?

At the age of 18 –armed with only a couple hundred dollars in a savings account– I set out to make this dream a reality. I knew I would need a continuous stream of income before proceeding with any philanthropic ideas, and began generating income through a number of means. I took took a full time job, started several home businesses and began building an investment portfolio. Everything seemed to be going in my favor, however, the dream began to fade during my early, mid-twenties. I had completely lost my way, and before long, the aspiring humanitarian had become the “Tyrant”.

My life has taught me a great many things; about myself, about what it means to be successful, how to love, how to beat depression, how not to be controlled by anger, and how to pursue your passions and chase your dreams with fervor instead of fear. But the most important lesson I’ve learned, is that our mistakes in life are not final.

For the next 6 weeks I will share some of my own “dark times”, and how I was able to live through them, sharing one entry per week. I’m not looking to change lives through these posts but I do hope that they provide answers, relief, or otherwise understanding to circumstances or experiences someone may currently be struggling with. 8 months ago