Until my very late teens writing was my way of escaping from the world, of crafting somewhere safe and stable for me to grow and discover who I was. It was about the passion, and the flow, and about being simultaneously connected and disconnected to the world.
It was a way of being, and I identified so closely with being a writer that I build my ideal future around it. I planned on becoming a published Author, and living off the measly royalties I made. I drove by houses and judged them based on how suitable a hideaway they’d be. I had everything figured out.
Until I faltered, and lost faith in myself and my craft and decided I needed a university education as a safety net. So away I went to University, I spent four years writing essays and literature reviews and scripts for group presentations but I stopped writing what I loved, because I didn’t have the time, or the inclination, and when I did find myself with pen in hand or perched in front of my computer all I could think about was how many words I’d just pumped out for another essay.
University made writing a chore. I kept meaning to write, and telling myself, that, as a writer, which I still identified as, I couldn’t put what I really wanted on the back burner. But assignments have deadlines, and grades, and I stopped. I even decided the year after university I was going to live off pot noodles and bread and devote 365 days to writing. It didn’t happen.
Now I have my very expensive piece of paper and a job that pays the bills and I’m itching to write again. I need ink stains on my hands and occasionally my face from chewing on pens, I need sleepless nights because I’m on a roll. I need to find that little girl again, who asked for a box of exercise books for her Birthday.
So I want to, ‘Write More’, But how am I going to achieve that? What does it look like when you have a grown up job and a grown up life and sometimes you can’t keep doing what you want because you’ve run out of clean clothes and have to do some laundry?
It looks like squeezing as much of the written word into each day as I can, in any form that I can. Including.
- Letters to my Pen pal A Pen pal from my youth recently reconnected and we’re currently in this beautiful, flowing part of our friendship where we’re reintroducing ourselves to each other after seven years of absence. It’s fresh, and new, and far more exciting than I remember it.
I’ve also considered finding another Pen Pal, somebody new and exciting that fits me now, Not me when I was a reckless teenager.
- Postcrossing I’m one of those frustrating people who has terrible trouble committing to postcrossing, and I’m willing to admit that I’ve failed at it before. I’ve hit that ‘Get address’ Button five times, had every intention of popping to the shops and purchasing postcards and completely forgotten. Not this time.
This time I had the good sense to stock up on postcards and stamps before I registered for the website, I’ve sent out three cards so far, and have two ready to be sent once I finish work today.
- Journalling I’ve successfully journalled in the past, and on the odd occasion I pull out an old diary, flip through the pages and laugh at how childish I was. I feel like I’m going through a great period of growth at the moment, and don’t want to forget what it feels like.
- Writer’s Circle I recently decided to investigate local writing groups, and have found one in particular of interest. They meet fortnightly and have prompts listed on their website for a short piece that you share during the group, and in house competitions. I have every intention of lurking in the corner at their next meeting.
- Creative Writing And of course, I’ll continue to attempt to write an amazing novel, or a breathtaking short. I might even try my hand at poetry, even though in the past that’s been a train wreak.
I’m not sure how to goalpost this goal, and how I’ll consider it complete. But I guess I’ll cross that bridge when I come to it.
Looks like I should add 43things to the list, since I practically just wrote a novel. Please excuse if it makes no sense. I tend to ramble during my night shifts t work.3 months ago