Untitled
2 years ago
Worth doing, if you want a rush.
How to break the law
It made me
Whatever 
"I discovered that I was not, in fact, a klepto."
How I did it: I shoplifted a book from a bookstore, mostly just to see if I could do it. I've always enjoyed trying to figure out how to break laws and not get caught as an intellectual puzzle, and I thought I might as well put it into practice.
I used one of my most thought-out plans (see below) and successfully stole the book. However, it was incredibly undramatic. I didn't even have to talk my way out of anything! I suppose I could argue that this shows the success of my plan, but really. Besides, I felt guilty about taking money from authors I liked.
In sum: petty crime is far more interesting as an intellectual puzzle than as a profession.
Lessons & tips: How to steal a book from a bookstore, The Complete Guide.
1) Dress like a nerd or a college student. This is to make the employees' eyes gloss right over you. Bring a big backpack.
2) Wander around the bookstore for a time, selecting books. Scout out where/if there are cameras.
3) When you're certain you're not being watched, tear off the sticker and stuff the book in your backpack.
4) Walk out confidently and with absolutely no facial expression that you're doing something wrong.
Important note: you know those-- I can't think of a word to describe them-- sort of flat obelisks you walk through to leave? I am 99% certain those exist to catch shoplifters. Walk around them. Better safe than sorry.
5) If you get caught, which you shouldn't, acting ability is vital. Act like the picture of innocence until they find the book, at which point act embarrassed, horrified and apologetic. Say you have no idea how that got there and it must have fallen in. Give them the book back.
Resources: A lot of acting ability. Even though your heart is pumping and your hands are sweating, act confident (except, of course, in Step 5).
A bookstore.
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eversosweetly all you need is love
Untitled
2 years ago
let’s just say i had to pay a hefty fine…money i didn’t have and will never see again. :(
Rob the rich and give to the needy
3 years ago
Just because there are too many laws and dickheads rule the world.
don't know if this counts...
3 years ago
when i made this goal i meant something memorable, but i break the law all the time by speeding or drinking underage. and i don’t feel particularly adventurous drug-wise recently, so i think i’m gonna stay with my passive little transgressions. snuck some beer last night, okay? lone star. a bottle and a half. am a rebel, to be sure.
