experience ego death

I don’t want to get too metaphysical, but I have experienced and continue to experience ego death, by which I mean: There is no me outside of me. There is nothing of me that will continue when I am dead. The “soul” is only the name we give to those chemical compounds that give us the ability to think, and shape the world.

If it sounds nihilistic, it is not. Our lives are a nearly incomprehensibly unlikely gift, one we should not waste. We should never deny the ability to continue thinking to another human being. Indeed, we should not only do our best to increase our own ability to think, but do our best to add to other human beings’ ability to think. As far as we know thus far, we are the only creatures in the cosmoverse with the ability to actually at least try to figure out about the cosmoverse. Even the stupidest human is, by definition, smarter than a dead rock.

Let go of your ego, realize that you, as you, will only exist for as long as you have to live. And then take up that amazing bounty and think, think, think, and create things that make the world better for your fellow few thinkers.

The Void
What place is this?
The blackest hole
The darkest abyss
The void and a soul

A feeling of terror
Disorientation too
What is in there?
The Nothing and you

Duped
My ego is a dupee and a duper
And its joke has been on me
I played my part just super
And I even paid a fee

I see it so clearly now
I purchased many lies
Built identity on them wow
They gave me lows and highs

Running toward or running from
Such agony it would cause
Looking for something to numb
The pain to put on pause

It might sound a bit insane
Or extremely paranoid too
But I will not trust a brain
That doesn’t know what’s true

I spent my first life running
Running from my pain
I’ll spend my next life fighting
Fighting to be sane

What would the world be like
If each one did their part
Told the ego “Take a hike”
And listened to the heart

Transition
A Psychotic break
Is not a mistake
It’s an Emergency call
For the ego to fall
A spiritually sent
Healing event

As if to say:

Don’t just survive
Now, you can thrive
Silence the voices
You are your choices
Get rid of fear
And live my dear!

Solitude
In this solitude You gave me
It feels so strange, unreal and odd
How can I really be worry-free
If I don’t know who I am God

I lost myself to find myself
And I haven’t got a clue
My ego sits on top the shelf
I’m waiting to hear from You

I’ve got this funny feeling though
It’s not a mystery to be solved
And the answer I should know
Because the conflict was resolved

It appears the torment I endured
Was a self-created condition
And now that I have been cured
I’ll choose to break tradition

I won’t define the who of me
And will leave it in the air
Without a me by which to flee
I’ll fly up high and dare

Spiritual Experience
“Go to Hell!” I smiled with a grin
I’ve been there already because of my sin
I envied myself to the Pit of Despair
And found all the Joy missing from there

Lucky for me I didn’t stay long
It wasn’t my fault my belief was all wrong
He gave me a choice; He gave me free will
I accepted His presence or I would be there still

The second I did the dark became light
He showed me the heavens; What a beautiful sight!
He showed me the place that I couldn’t conceive
“Pure Joy” to experience so that you can believe

When he brought me back to earthly ground
My heart was lost but now is found!
No words can describe this journey I took
You can rest assured I’ll be reading The Book!

Emancipation Day!
A Professional tortured soul
Fighting every day to endure
Clever at running from agony
Midas Touch Sewage Engineer
Turning negative garbage into gold

I believe it was a big conspiracy
My house of many cards collapsed
Every one of them fell straight down
And I found myself stuck in the pit
Alone with no escape to be found

Stubborn-willed, self-sufficient atheist
Would I call on Him to save me
From the place that knows no Joy?
The longer I stay the deader I become
No alarm clock loud enough to wake me.

How can it be only two months in here
Already no dreams left that matter
Stay any longer my mind might shatter
This is a conspiracy. A set-up I tell you!
What the heck. It’s worth a try.

Begrudgingly acknowledge I have a soul
Agree the body can not live without Joy
Call upon the Blessed name of the Lord
To get me out of this dark unholy place
Deliverance, Pure Joy, and Bliss!

Bliss causes the Kundalini Genie to awaken

So you believe! Then prove your Loyalty!
As I got down on my knees in submission
I took the knife and sliced open my own chest
Diced up my lying heart and offered it up
Layer by Layer. Piece by Piece.

Hey, it wasn’t easy for a Midas Touch Sewage Engineer
to surrender all the angst to the Genie of Kundalini!
Tortured Soul. Freed Soul. Emancipation Day!
Stormy skies turned into Sunshine and Rainbows
Burned to ashes but an opportunity for happiness.

How does one live without angst?

The Abyss and Bliss
I quit puffing for the moody dragon that lives inside of me
I fed him what he wanted: “Pure Joy” and set the dragon free
He breathed fire everywhere and wrecked havoc with my mind
I’m so much better when the dragon is locked up and confined

While he was loose he prophesied the world’s destruction
And gave hope a Saviour; My that’s quite a seduction
I wonder if the authors of the Bible suffered from this
Joy and Despair; the perpetual fight between the abyss and bliss

The melancholy is back now that I smoked my two packs
It’s much more comfortable here so maybe I can relax
I won’t be feeding him positive feelings for quite some time
It’s funny that negative feelings can make me feel sublime

Ouroboros
The story has been told from ancient times
Christ was sacrificed for all our crimes
He’s the Dragon Slayer that bridges the gap
Between the abyss of this and the bliss of that

Ouroboros has a beginning as well as an end
If you arrive in Hell on the Dragon Tail’s End
Believe and surrender all the angst to Him
It takes humility and repentance to start again

I experienced ego death the first and only time a tried mushrooms. The trip started out great , but my mind began to go into this downward spiral of negative thoughts. Fear overcame me and i had no control over myself or my surroundings. I began to fall into a black hole, being sucked in by what seemed to be black thorn bushes. I could feel myself entering the depths of hell.
Then gods hand( i thought it was him) grabbed me and pulled me out of hell and threw me into an empty room with brilliant white lighting. I was naked and just skin and bone. I remember i felt like i was crying but i could not get the tears out. It was an intense rush of emotion, but the fear was gone. I felt completly hollow, weightless and begging for salvation. For the first time i truely felt like what it meant to be a sinner.
To this day i still think about my trip. I dont know what any of it meant, but it was by far my most spiritual experience i have ever had. I think this experience has it negative effects on me,for instance i feel that i cant relate to society any more, almost like i have fallen off the face of the earth, and now im trying desperatly to be a normal 20 year old. I feel left behind and i cant catch up. Crazy shit.
Any one know about this? Is it normal???

Ego makes so many problems. “I” want to be free of fear and greed. “I” want to get to the root of existence.

a night i took 6 Gr of mexican mushrooms
it was the first and the last time i took strong allucinogen .
i made an extreme paranoiac crysis ; so extreme that my brain started thinking that i was simply dead yet .
and then i begun my trip .
a very very violent trip with the theme : ’ i am dead ‘
my english is too poor to discribe what i saw .
i just can tell u that at the end of the torture trip i saw
the Ohm symbol as a very powerfull and vibration revelation .
The Ohm was Vibrating with very high intensity ; so high that i started vibrating at the same frequency .and then , when i was ‘synchronised’ with the symbol ,all my fears and pains desappeared suddenly
this revelation let me calmed for the rest of my life i think .
it’s my best and worst experience of my life .

and then i passed 4 years trying to be cured .
now i’m fine , but always borderline …

but now i live more intensely my life than before the
’ accident ‘

if u have any question , i’ll try to answer it
and if someone has an explanation , i’d like to read it .

thank’s for all

cya bros

Experiencing ego death was the closest thing to a spirituality I’ve ever had. It was quite scary to say the least. It happened the first time I took mushrooms. I was only 18 at the time and had just moved out on my own, leaving the very radically religious background I was brought up in. Quite ready to experience life, but not at all ready for what I was about to undergo (if, in fact, anyone can be ready for this life shattering blow). I came about this life-altering state while tripping and it being my first time, I didn’t know what to experience, so I thought I could just go to sleep and be fine. Being in complete darkness while peaking is just not a smart thing to do. Your mind can lead you down the dark spiral in this way. I felt, “This is what it must be like to be dead.” I didn’t know what happened at the time, but I am convinced ego death is what I experienced. Ever since then, nothing feels really real. I usually feel no light, or love and deceptively feel that I don’t have an effect on humanity anymore. It’s a long hard road out, if you don’t know what you’re dealing with. I think realization is the first step and from there, with concentrated mental work, you can make your life that much better than what it was before this enlightening experience, when life was blissfully naive.

I can’t really ever say that I have truly experienced ego death-I look forward to it. I have been lost in my head on LSD at the age of 18, but I was fearful and agressive because of my loss(of identity perhaps?) I’m not even sure if that’s ego death, but I’m trying to learn more. This is a huge goal for me, and I understand how painful it can be, and that I’m in no way prepared yet. I think about it almost everyday, I talk about it too much, but for some reason I feel I need it. Hmmm, perhaps that’s why I’m so into sham,ns and mushrooms since I was like in 6th grade? I’d love any suggestions. Are there any other methods other than entheogens or asceticism?

Be careful that you don’t linger too long at the barrier between constructed egoisms while expanding consciousness. It can be very scary to deconstruct, and some level of reconstruction afterwards is necessary for practical function. I spent about a week in a daze after experiencing what I would definitely call ego death while using LSD. The feeling of utter neutrality and simultaneous understanding to this extreme is extremely atypical to human experience.

Potentially unhelpful stuff: alienating, sense of loss, difficulty with reconstruction, possible consensus-reality functional impairment, “external” stimuli become just a soft blip on the psychological radar (can lead to bodily neglect if responsibility isn’t taken)

General/ good stuff: peace, understanding, sense of relief, “reality check”

TRAUMA CREATES PATHWAYS TO A NEW “SELF.” SHEDDING ALL OF YOUR PENT UP GARBAGE THAT IS BOUND UP IN YOUR SUBCONCIOUS ALLOWS A TRANSFORMATION THAT IS INCREDIBLE. YOU HAVE TO FACE THE TOXIC PEOPLE THAT HAVE BEEN A PART OF YOUR LIFE. LOVING AND ACCEPTING YOURSELF WILL OPEN A PORTAL TO THIS NEXT DIMENSION. MY NEW “SELF” IS GOD-GIVEN. ALLOWING HIM TO TAKE MY LIFE AND LEAD ME WHERE HE WANTS ME HAS CREATED A LIGHT WITHIN ME. HEALTHY GUIDES ARE COMING INTO MY LIFE EVERYDAY. THERE IS NOT A DAY THAT GOES BY THAT SOMEONE WITH AN INTERNAL LIGHT WALKS INTO MY PATH. I HAVE BECOME THE BUTTERFLY BECAUSE I LEFT THE COCOON WHICH CONTAINED THE POISONED EGO THAT WAS IN ME. “BUTTERFLY IS FREE TO FLY, FLY AWAY BUTTERFLY.”

the world felt fuzzy and I couldn’t hear, all of a sudden I was gone, I came to on the ground and I was staring.. I heard everything at once, and felt everything at once.. my friend thought I died… ask me how this happened! without drugs!