you know? 4 years ago

I found the lessons I had to learn, wasn’t easy but worth doing. 5 years ago

‘I must remember that my past is like compost: the most important parts have gone to make me what I am and the rest has broken down to wisdom and experience’

compost…nutrients, leftovers, recyclable rubbish

leading to something that nourishes, what a great idea 5 years ago

... making the best of the past by learning from it 6 years ago

I’m in the midst of saying goodbye to the elders I’ve been learning from and caring for this past winter. Many of them are dear to me. Professionalism demands that goodbye truly mean goodbye: no running back to visit and thereby undermine the new student rabbi. Yesterday was the first big wave of it, since next visit is the dreaded “last visit.”

This morning I woke up feeling AWFUL. Several chronic health issues seemed all to have bloomed at once. I called in sick to school and spent most of the day in bed, reading a little, mostly sleeping, drinking lots of water.

Finally it dawned on me, when I looked at the calendar here on my computer: my beloved grandmother died 33 years ago yesterday. Her loss knocked me off my 19 year old feet, and I still miss her very much.

It didn’t take rocket science to connect point A and point B.

How to compost this? Same way I have for years and years. Remember that she’d be proud of the work I’m doing (she loved to spend time with older people, too, even though she never really got to BE one, dying at 67.) Be a good person, and let her memory be for a blessing.

Take two insights, and get up in the morning and go about my business. 6 years ago

I had my second date in 24 hours with this very nice fella; he came over and we played guitar and sang from Rise Up Singing. He asked me when I learned to play guitar; I thought back and told him the story of the ex who taught me guitar and then dumped me. But as I was telling him it occurred to me how learning to play guitar had really changed my life – I started singing regularly, had a goal for a while of writing and performing folk music (may never happen, but still), and generally learned quite a lot of stuff in the meantime.

And now I have a new friend to share it with! We’re basically at the same level (though I’m a little rusty), and it’s just great fun. 6 years ago

I do this, & it’s worth it. 6 years ago

oh, YEAH!!!!!

Moriel, thank you for a GREAT metaphor! I have to meditate on this one… the more I think about it, the better it gets. 6 years ago

I’m so in. 6 years ago

I loved Moriel’s comment that “I must remember that my past is like compost: the most important parts have gone to make me what I am and the rest has broken down to wisdom and experience” I want to do the same! 7 years ago

I want to continue to come to terms with my past and remember that because of it I am who I am today. I like myself and want to continue to grow. I must remember that my past is like compost: the most important parts have gone to make me what I am and the rest has broken down to wisdom and experience. That’s a whole lot better than the bag of poop I carried around for so long. 7 years ago