let go of my regrets

I know that every bad thing I have done or gone through has only shaped and forged me into the person I am now, but I still wish that I could have become better through some happier life lesson.

I regret the things that I didn’t do. I regret the way I’ve become so bitter and distrustful. I regret tending the bad relationships and letting the good, healthy ones dry up and die. I regret not catching on sooner. I regret not taking Sciences in High School so that I could be a Bio major now. I regret loving him so much and knowing we’d be together forever (and selling my furniture because of this) only o have him change his mind.

These regrets swim through my mind. They are part of what I am. I have to let go of a part of myself even though I am still weak from giving too much of myself to people who only tossed those pieces aside.

that i left my journals in public places for others to find (like bookcrossing but much more personal). Then I became panicked and felt a strong desire to try and find them all. I was afraid of someone taking them but also of the journals being ignored or thrown out.

Then I woke up….

I’ve been fascinated by the idea of actually doing this now.

not turn back time…

is fixing my mistakes. But what about the mistakes I can’t fix?... I hate myself for making them and for not doing anything.

It’s not worth the energy to have regrets. Learn and move on.

I simply cannot face the place where I think of the past and just let it go…
It is more complicated than I thought it would be, and I wish I’d finish this goal soon…

It hurts.

You can’t change the past. What’s done is done and there is no going back. You can’t, in desperate hindsight, reverse time to undo mistakes. Mistakes have to be made in order to learn the lesson, but sometimes the lesson is too harsh and doesn’t seem quite worth it.

Worthy of respect or not, things happened and that is how it is. It is near impossible to live a happy life with regrets. I need to let go of my regrets in order to fully appreciate my current circumstances. There is just so much I wish I could have done differently…choices made that were totally wrong, niavety in certain experiences, compulsiveness with the opposite sex, preventing a new life that was beginning to form.

I regret letting people go when I should’ve made them stay…I regret allowing some to stay when I should’ve said goodbye. There is much to regret.

This is going to take a long time.

I finally today read this goal and said to myself…....regrets are worthless, ridiculous, time wasting moments. I am never , EVER , going to have another regret.

After 18 years I started to play again in the spring of 2004.I started again to honor My mom for telling me to basically ””get off you dead ass and Do something even if it’s wrong” You see I Lost her after she fought cancer for 2 years. She said the only thing she regretted was having Regrets. Meaning if you want to do something than Damn it do it ,Your not getting a second chance!”She told me to stop being afraid.Fear is what held her back.Fear of what others thought,fear of the unknown,just FEAR. I play to honor my mother for all the shirts she ironed every week for my guitar teacher to pay for my lessons .12 shirts= 1/2 hour lesson! 5 Kids no extra money.To honor her belief in me at 14 years of age to pay for a masters class in Guitar at the University of Minnesota- Duluth .I was away for 3 months. I don’t know where the money came from.So I play my guitars. I play every day. I play for her but mostly I play because it was my first love,with out regrets anylonger!
...If something is calling to you then Be Like NIKE “Just Do IT”