Be less cranky

how can I do this if people keep making me angry!? my boyfriend won’t talk to me about serious stuff face to face, just over text for the past month… its like what? we are grown up lets just have a conversation. im going for a run to clear my head. it is a nice day and im moping. i want to be happy but its sometimes very hard.

until last night i just lost it! but i feel like my man was being unreasonable. i can’t always be fun to be around. if he wants to give crap he has to be willing to take it! i feel like generally i’m not cranky, but once something sets me off, i have a really hard time letting it go. i just need to remind myself, what am i upset about? is it really a big deal? usually not :)

sometimes i mood swing and lose it so bad i wonder if i have a brain tumor. before i would have said, “thats not like me” but it is increasingly becoming so… ugh thats not how i want to be. and i can’t pinpoint WHY i am being so moody…
i have the BEST family
great friends and roommates
The Absolute Most Amazing Man
a nice job that pays the bills
complete independence
so im trying to keep this in mind, and i think slowly, im getting back to my old self :)

I have really focused on being the non-cranky cat lady these days. I think now that I am more conscious of it, I am cranky less or at least identify it faster and fix it faster. The best way for me to fix it is to remove myself from company (take an Alice moment) and do something physical. I have found that running, swimming, and gardening (especially sawing palm fronds!) really get my aggression and crankiness out. So for now, I take this as an accomplishment. When I start teaching again in the Fall I might have this as a goal again…sigh.

Such an easy statement, yet sometimes we forget that simply changing our views changes everything! Yesterday I was ready to go cliff diving without the ocean. So I knew there were two answers: go to work today angry and defensive, or let go, let God, and remember that nothing that happens should be taken personally. It’s not between me and these aggrivations caused by others—it’s between them and God.

...not to be cranky when your work starts to rule your life and not in a good way. Time to reorganize things!