get away from here

I’m trapped. I’ll be 19 September 5th and I have no Job and my car isn’t in my name. All my life my parents havn’t let me go anywhere or do anything. I feel like if I were somewhere else I could actually have a life.

I’m supposed to be in love, buuuuuuuuuuuuuut, I’ve spent the last two days alone, alone, and alone. I live in an entire new state, and I do not know anyone, so I don’t know. I just hate feeling like this.

Back on the road. I´ll do it on my own… Like Muscle Museum.

Let´s stick to the plan…

do i really know what i’m doing?

I am stuck “here” with my family. I know they love me, but I can’t stand living with them, anymore.
In a typical day, if I do 10 things 8 of them are for someone else. The most I really do for myself is drive myself to therapy. I do not have children, I have a DOG, but somehow I find myself driving other people’s children around to various places. I find myself saying, “I DON”T HAVE KIDS”, almost on a daily basis.
I can’t afford to move, but, if I can finish these last two years of college; maybe, I can leave and attempt to regain, at least, some of my sanity.

to be with her.

in ways of thinking, we all have the urge to learn, we all believe we have to be smart, we all believe knowledge is a must, I wish no one would have ever taught me anything, I wish I could be Tarzan for a day. oooh(sigh) how different things would be.

i got out!
i’m in college across the country.

i’m in love with the west coast. i never want to leave.

Now I have to do it all by myself. God and myself, for sure. Like it has always been.

To just keep driving until I find that perfect place.