conquer my fear of needles

My roommate told me, “the best thing you could get me for Christmas would be to donate blood.”

I’m petrified of needles.

I’ve been making myself watch people get shots in movies, and so on, but it still makes me deeply uncomfortable. Nonetheless, next time my roommate is eligible, we’re going to go donate blood together. Here’s hoping I can make it through! If I can do that, then I think I’ll have beat this goal.

Today I went to the doctor’s, and he said I should get blood drawn. So I did. Without hyperventilating, without tears, without a fuss! I can’t believe it! I’m so proud of myself.

I have been scared, scared, scuuurrrred of needles thanks to my Mom who gave me a very unessecairly rough Hep B shot a few years ago. I went yesterday to have my blood drawn to join the bone marrow registry and it wasn’t very bad at all. Sure I had someone hold my hand and I didn’t look directly at the needle but I didn’t freak out, cry or hyperventilate! SCORE!

The growth on my neck was a foreign body granuloma: completely harmless, just really weird. Basically a foreign body, like a tiny speck of glass or dust, gets stuck deep in the skin. White blood cells come along and attack the invader, enveloping it in the carcasses of thousands of white blood cells. Then it rises to the surface of the skin.

Fascinating, ain’t it?

So now it’s back, so my mom wants me back the dermatologist to get it taken off again. I have no idea when an appointment will be scheduled, but I suppose when the time comes they’ll have to use an injected anaesthetic. Another test!

I, Rachel the Needlephobe, have just donated blood for scientific examination and become the test subject for a radical vaccine.

Actually, I just got blood drawn and got my tetanus shot. :) And since I seem to be a glutton for punishment, I got them done within 20 minutes of each other.

Surprisingly, the tetanus shot hurt less than getting blood drawn. I couldn’t help but panic, but I managed to calm down more quickly.

I’m not going to call this conquered yet, but suffice to say I’m actually getting somewhere.

Just got back from the dermatologist. I had to get a growth on my neck removed. And of course, the doctor had to use an injected anasthetic. I didn’t cry! Didn’t even throw a hissy fit! Just breathed deep and squeezed my mom’s hand.

I won’t go as far as to say this goal is accomplished, but I’d like to think I’m on my way. I emailed the SoCal Hypnotherapy Association of Something and asked what qualifications I should look for. I’d like to conquer this fear entirely.

Yesterday I went to the doctor to get antibiotics for my strep throat, and he ordered some blood work done. I’ve been thinking about how I want a navel piercing, and all the other things that require needles, and how it doesn’t scare me “intellectually” anymore. So we get to the lab, I sit down in the chair.

And I panic.

So my mom had me lie down in the other room, we do the whole “breathe-deep-and-think-about-the-puppy” shtick, and the blood gets drawn. I’m very proud of myself by the fact that I didn’t start absolutely bawling like I used to, but it’s very unwieldy to have to deal with nearly passing out every time a needle is headed your way.

So I’d like to conquer my fear of needles. This looks like a job for…SUPER SHRINK! Or a hypnotist.