find out who i am

Im new to this but i want to find who i truly am. i was something else before but i know that wasn’t me and now im confused because i don’t know who my friends are because i chamged so much from before that i have hardly any left, and im not going back because i have changed for the better…but where do i go from now?

...I feel like I’m coping well without it. I still have my ‘moments’ but I do seem to recollect things I’ve learnt and feel more able to cope effectively without resorting to unhealthy methods than I ever have before.

Yet I still keep coming back to the question of who I am. Sometimes I feel like I am trying to meet someone else’s ideals. I try to have a quick stocktake now and again to question if I am being authentic and it disturbs me when I am unsure.

I not done with this goal though I want to be!

well i am who i am for purpose. nontheless, i must first find out who i am.

I am tall
I am ginger
My favourite bit of a song is always the bridge
I am an avoider
I am crap at small talk
I am not good with children unless they are relatated to me
I am awkward (and probably always will be)
I will probably be just a little bit fat
I am sarcastic
I am confident (sometimes)
I get super motivated for about a week at a time
I don’t cry
I listen to weird songs that no one has ever heard of
I repeat quotes off films
On bad days I always doubt myself
I like clothes that I couldn’t bring myself to wear
I think that everyone else is cooler than me
I am an avid tea drinker
I don’t get the fascination with technology
I never carry my mobile anywhere
I like books
I get stressed easily
I have too many bad habits to count
and usually at any new situation, I am scared shitless.

I think thats about it.

Lifen no doubt is the biggest master and we learn lot of things in life .We do cahnge in our approach depending on the situation we are ,i sometimes doubt about myself and thinks who am i ,what am i doing in this world ,why i am doing ,for whom i am doing .is earnig money is the most impoertant thing in life or there are other things also .

I am working in training orgainisation,but sometimes when driving back to my home i dream of a life in some mountains with a small house ,total peace surrounded by green valleys ,there i am sitting and scanning nature from its single part of dust to the big trees and trying to understand the glory of god .But as of now it certainly looks likes a dream for me .I am not saying that its difficult thing to do but you need enogh courage to do this .

Once i was passing through a river and i saw a person sitting there and talking to himself .for a while i thought he must be some mad guy just waisting his time ,but when i saw his face ,i dont know wht happen but it just got attracted towards that ,there was some flow of energy and finally i asked him
me : Hi if you dont mind can i ask you who you are ,
person : Hi , my name is steven and i am V P finance for X company.
me :sir nice to meet you,i am just curious to know with whon you are talking
Person : I know you must be thinking wht a mad guy he is ,but son after working for almost 35 years ,somemonths back i found one intresting fact
Me : sir whts tht
Person : Son i ahve been working from the age of 18 and today i am 53.My family is very happy with me because i provide them all the luxary one can give.i gave them enough time also ,
Me :Thts gud sir tht means youy are truly a successfull person
Person: Yes i am but after all this wht i found is ,that in last 35 years i have been working and doing good but was not giving time to my innnerself .was getting into stress and was never able to find the real reason for this ,but today i think i know the real reason .
Me : sir wht is tht
Person :L see we work to earn money and in that race we forget that sometimes we do certain things that are against our values ,culture.we did not remeber such things but our innerself keeps the account of all such things and he gets annoyed with you ,and you become stressfull and point out to some other reasons other then the real .you give time to everyone but how many hours or minutes in a day you give to yourself ,how many times you atlk to yourself .and thats the reason we always get confuse in defining WHO AM I .because we are not aware of this .

DEAR SON I AM FINDING THE SAME THING “WHO AM I”BUT WITH THE RIGHT APPROCH THT IS TALK TO YOURSELF KNOW WHO YOU ARE .

i want to get….a lot of money…i want to keep my family persons happy…i am very tense now…i want to do a lot but doing nothing…i like one girl but she is not of that type who will keep such type of relationship…i have not given satisfied results so my family persons are also sad coz of me…what should i do now??

A lot of things have made me what I am. But what am I; who am I? I am five foot six with green eyes and dark brown hair that falls right above my shoulders. I am one hundred and fourteen pounds of the unknown. I want to make something of myself, become something amazing. I want people to know my name, but I have to know who I am before I can expect others to.

I came from a loosely knit, Christian family, with parents that have put on faces for the people they know, for as long as I can remember. I learned to lie, and to lie well, but somehow, now, after all of my experiences, I can’t stand in front of somebody, straight faced, and be dishonest.

My parents didn’t teach me how to tear down walls; they taught me how to build them. In a sense, I feel I have built a wall between who I really am, and what everybody else sees when they look at me. I have one friend and a boyfriend, no other connections to the outside world. I want to break out; but reversing the affects of a sheltered lifestyle is almost impossible.

I like to think that I don’t lie to people. But if you are telling the same lies to yourself, are you really lying at all? I have conditioned myself to bottle up my emotion, and when I feel something that others would disprove of, I avoid confrontation. I walk on eggshells, all to save the feelings of those who can’t accept me.

I want to find myself. I want to be who I really am.

I want the confidence to show my true colors.

I envy those who can.

...only 3 more sessions with my therapist.

We’ve been talking about ending for a while and I feel ready but I am still quite afraid. Today we discussed what I need to ‘end’. I’m scared I will forget what I’ve learnt about myself. I know that’s silly really because it’s forming who I am now but I would like some kind of ‘report’ or something I can look back on to remember what I have learnt about myself.

I’ve agreed to reflect on these issues over the next week or so…I feel some doodling coming on….

I am figuring this out slowly but surely. So far I have this,

I am the type of girl who goes out of my way to help anyone, I am happy and very talkative. But it annoys me when someone is rude while I help them. I am the type of girl who always has a book with her, its in my purse at all times. Its a safety net. Reading is one of the only things that make sense to me. If I can throw myself into a great book my life is complete. Music is the other thing that I understand. A good song explains life, and I find myself trying to find myself in a good song. I am a very passionate person. If I find something that I love I will give myself completly to that. I am like that in relationships to. I am the kind of person who does not get brought down by other peoples issues but I am very empathetic and will try my hardest to help..

This is just a little of what I am finding out. More will come I know that! But I am happy and for the first time in awhile I am proud to be who I am.

im still working on this.