Dear 43 Things Users,

10 years after introducing 43 Things to the world, we have decided we have met our last goal: completing the incredible experience that has been 43 Things. Please join us in giving one last cheer to all the folks who have shared their goals with the world, as well as all the people who have worked at The Robot Co-op to build this incredible website. We won a Webby Award, published a book, and brought happiness to a lot of people.

Starting today, 43 Things users can export their goals and entries from the site. Starting August 15, we will make the site “read only”. 43 Things users will still be able to view the site and export their content, but we won’t be taking any new content from users. We hope to leave the site up for folks to see and download their content until the end of the year. Ending on New Year’s Eve takes us full circle.

It has been a long ride (one of our original goals was to "build a company that lasts at least 2 years” - we beat that one!) While we wish the site could live on, it has suffered from a number of challenges - changes in how people use the site, the advertising industry, and how search engines view the site. We wish the outcome was different – but we’ve always been realistic about when our goals are met and when they aren't.

As of today, you will be able to download your goals and entries. See more about that on the FAQ page. Thanks for 10 great years of goal-setting and achieving.

- The Robots.

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overcome PTSD

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missashleyc 2 weeks ago


♥loverr girrl♥support group

found a support group. 1 month ago


mysterious_lass04 2 months ago


seakisshe's visiting next month

& I don’t think I’m ready. :(
i’m scared because i am still working through body image issues (or not really working through them, and that’s the problem) + of course the PTSD is not yet resolved. I want to make it work though and i feel comfortable trying at least so that’s not even in question, but I’m worried things won’t go well because I am still dealing with past experiences.

either way though i’m jumping into unknown territory: I am in love with him, and I HAVE progressed, and I hope that’s enough to squeak by. 2 months ago


♥loverr girrl♥ground yourself

when you are having a flashback or PTSD, ground yourself,

do something to bring you back to the present and in a safe place, like have some strong scent, pictures, or feel something cold or take a walk,

something to awaken your physical senses and remind you that you are not in the past, and what is happening to you is a completely different situation, 4 months ago


♥loverr girrl♥support group

i joined a PTSD support group and have met others who are similar to me. Helps a lot. 4 months ago


seakiss idon't know if i've mentioned this

but the man I’m in love with is visiting in June and I am worried that I will feel self conscious and shameful and go numb during physical intimacy, like I always do. I feel like this will be different, this time, this man, but I have to ask myself WHY I think that. I know I’ve gotten much better, so there’s that. But have I gotten THAT much better?

I don’t know—this whole relationship has opened me up to so much and so many ways of thinkings and thoughts in general. I feel more awake and alive than I ever have been because he has helped a lot and I have been working a lot at all this. I created a blog with letters to him and poems for him that he’ll never see, because it’s more an effort to work through some of my issues. I’m not putting stock in him, not saying he’s saving me or whatever. But he helps and this is how I’m working it out 6 months ago


seakissself concept and ptsd

I think my self concept is really wrapped up in this illness. I think I still blame myself for everything, or I blame the world and then feel shameful over it. Shame.. that’s a very strong feeling for me. It always has been. It hurts a LOT. It’s one of the hardest emotions for me—but the anger.. the incessant anger is really bad, almost intolerable, and I think it’s closely associated with the shame. I need to start meditating again. I’ve been taking care of myself pretty well lately. Showering every day for the past week, exercising, eating more mindfully, taking more photos.

My father is coming to visit, and that triggers a lot of shame and anger for me. My mother is really attacking him, and it hurts a little. I’ve talked to her about it but I’m the only one she has to vent to. That hurts a little too, because I want to help. But it just.. hurts me, also.

We’ll see how the visit goes. Hopefully I’ll cope well. I think I will this time. :-) 7 months ago


strangelings 8 months ago


seakissa friend has approached me with his PTSD

and while traumas are a very personal thing, I think helping him will help us both because I’ll get more involved and innovative in my approach to PTSD, so I think it will be good for both of us. 8 months ago


seakissstill strong

I feel like I thought because the flashbacks and nightmares were gone, I’d gotten through it. But part of it too is the feelings of being hunted, the fear of establishing new relationships, sexual and physical shame, dwelling on the past, letting the past stop me from move forward, etc. I’m not sure if all of these are symptoms of PTSD, but I know most of them are and they’re all interconnected.

I will overcome PTSD by:
  • I will forgive the people who have hurt me
    - by continuing the project I’ve been working on
    - by accepting that I’m stronger and the traumas have made me deeper and wiser
  • writing down my concerns and the points I feel I need to concentrate on
  • cooperating in therapy and expressing my concerns honestly
  • meditation
  • allowing myself to be sexual & exploring my sexuality
  • getting to a point where I can provide my real name
  • remembering the traumas were enacted by HUMAN people NOT omnipotent and omnipresent superhuman forces
  • forgiving myself. 12 months ago

seakiss 12 months ago


Allison 17 months ago


Whitney 20 months ago


♥loverr girrl♥talking about it

one thing that helps me get over abuse, bad memories, PTSD, anxiety, panic, depression, terror, etc. is to talk about it.

Talk about it to crisis lines, safe environment support groups, close friends, even new friends, kind people, just talk to anyone about it, talk and talk.

Talking just lets it all out. You had to keep all of this a secret for so long. Feels good to talk. All this craziness and demons in your head, taking over your body and making you weak. Talking to another person who understands makes such a difference it’s not even funny.

Thanks to every sweet, friendly voice I’ve ever met on the phone, in person, or a sweet friendly face I’ve seen across the room. 20 months ago


♥loverr girrl♥you lose your power

i think what happens when you are attacked is that you lose your power. that person temporarily takes your power away from you. They make you feel powerless and you never know when they may attack again, and this leaves you shaky and nervous.

When I feel attacked all the energy just leaves my body. I feel completely defeated.

You have to get your power back. And also the question of why? why did that person choose me? In order to find this out you have to know that person – this is not always possible. You have to find some way to get your control back. Control of the situation.

One way I used to do gain control was to LOG everything. I would write down the date and time and what happened. Then write down everything that person did to intimidate me after that, date and times.

This way I can start seeing the pattern of that person’s behavior. It gives me a sense of control. It’s on paper. Not a “mad” “intimidating terrifying” person living in your head. 20 months ago


♥loverr girrl♥feeling better

i’m feeling better everyone. my anxiety has subsided. 20 months ago


♥loverr girrl♥today

Today I had a horrible PTSD episode. I met a man who called me a racist and started yelling at me and telling me to get away from him.

He kept trying to stare me down for a full 50 min. at the gym while I was on the cardio machine all because I almost ran into him ONE time!

I got mad and didn’t stare back at him and refused to let him intimidate me. Then after I got off the machine, he BUMPED into me on purpose, shoulder checked me (like a football player).

Later he kept staring at me as I did exercises.

I just called a crisis line and spoke to someone about it. If I hadn’t spoken to her or logged it on 43T, I would be having a major panic attack right now and even suicidal thoughts.

I am so afraid of men, especially those that try to intimidate me, it is not even funny.

First of all I am not racist and I don’t like how he assumed that I was. 2nd of all why is he trying to stare me down and thinks I am nasty because I stand up for myself? 20 months ago


user41574 21 months ago


♥loverr girrl♥2 days ago

-I did have an episode 2 days ago. It did bother me for hours. A therapist told me to not avoid these situations. The more you avoid it, the more afraid you become of them. He told me to go ahead and put myself in those situations “exposure therapy,” but really become aware of my body when I am going through it.

I guess take deep breaths, shake it off, walk around and get your body energy and power back.

I think immediately after it happens, I need to journal it, then remind myself that this person cannot hurt me and I am okay. Then just keep repeating it, like a mantra.

I need to process it somehow because these episodes tend to affect me for hours.

-Today, I had another small episode! I am not kidding you guys. You guys are probably laughing! Its something I deal with daily. Welcome to my life. This one was not so bad, I tried to think about it logically and thought about what I would do next time I saw this person. 21 months ago


♥loverr girrl♥Prayer For Courage

Dear God, give me courage,
for perhaps I lack it more than anything else.

I need courage before men/women against their threats
and against their seductions.

I need courage to bear unkindness,
mockery, contradiction.

I need courage to fight against the devil,
against terrors and troubles, temptations,
attractions, darkness and false lights,
against tears, depression, and above all fear.

I need Your help, dear God.

Strengthen me with Your love and Your grace.

Console me with Your blessed Presence
and grant me the courage to persevere
until I am with You forever in heaven. 21 months ago


♥loverr girrl♥ 21 months ago


Carlie 23 months ago


siacalin 2 years ago


identicalwoman

csfumi 2 years ago


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