Hello comrades, my name is Anna and I am in desperate need of help. I have become so obsessed with Mike Dirnt that I feel I have reached the brink of insanity. I would give anything to meet Mister Pritchard, and if I get extremely lucky, to marry him. However, I am a pathetic thirteen-year-old girl who’s reached a new level of normality. I have more of a chance of sprouting wings than I do of meeting my one true love. Someone please help me make any sort of contact with Mike whatsoever. I tried mailing him a card, saying that if he didn’t mail me back I’d be emotionally scarred, but I suppose it either never reached him or was heartlessly ignored. The person who helps me meet or make contact with Mike will forever be my hero.
Thanks,
Anna


