jerebel trying to come up with $900 by thursday so we have a place to live.
My dad, 4 years ago, was arrested for child molestation…among other things. I was in the middle of my divorce and one of the last conversations I had with him was him screaming at me about not being able to make my failed marriage work. Even though my husband was the one to walk away.
Background: In my dad’s house, growing up, it was….hitler-like rule. Do not speak unless answering a question. Do NOT have any hint of attitude in your voice at ANY time. Do whatever is asked of you, as you are a slave. Not to mention the head games. He always has people watching, checking up on us, reporting back to him. Even now, I wonder if he has someone to read this blog and report back to him. He ruled with complete terror and violence. And most important of all, DO NOT speak to anyone about what went on at home. I am forever scarred from my childhood. I thank God everyday that it is over.
That being said, as an adult, I was able to cultivate a relationship with my dad. I love him very dearly. We became very close. And as long as we didn’t talk about my childhood, it was a great relationship. Then he was arrested for molesting my little sisters. And for child pornography…among other things.
He disowned me because I would not walk away from my sisters and support him. He said they weren’t even my blood. How could I support them over him. I told him, step-sister or not, they are my sisters. I refused to chose a side and alienate anyone. This was not acceptable to him. He said via phone conversation thru his girlfriend that I was no longer his daughter and he never wanted to speak to me again.
That was 4 years ago. This past X-mas, I received a card in the mail from him that stated, “I love all my children, no matter what.” I cried for days. After not speaking to him for 4 years, this was a huge burden on my heart. But I was not going to be manipulated into walking away from my precious little sisters. Since then, I’ve gotten another card.
I’m hoping that somehow we can try to repair our relationship. My dad will not likely see the light of day again. He pled out and received about 29 years in prison. He is in his 50s and is in poor health. My only hope is that we can repair our relationship and attmept some sort of normalcy. As crazy as that sounds and as hard as that will be given the circumstances.
This is a HUGE burden on my heart and any support given will be greatly appreciated. Thanks for hanging in and reading this, i know its long. xoxo B.
