have the courage to start over

There are rules to doing this:

1. Accept the past. Don’t keep belittling yourself and telling yourself all the things you could have differently. If you could go back in the past things would have just ended up how they are now anyway, regardless of all the differences you would have attempted to make. Just let go of the past and focus on the present.

2. Start over for yourself and for no one else. Put yourself first and foremost. If you’re not ready to start over with someone and they want you to, don’t give into their pressure. Start over because YOU want to. Not because other people want you to.

3. Learn to love yourself and your mistakes. I’m still working on this one and it’s REALLY hard! While accepting others is very rewarding, accepting yourself and loving yourself is much much more. It sounds hard to do, I know, but it is possible. I promise.

4. Find someone BETTER. Find someone who not only meets your standards, but surpasses them! Don’t have low standards! Tell yourself you deserve better than you’ve ever had. While saying this, however, learn that not everyone is perfect. When you meet someone don’t flat out convince yourself that they’re perfect. Because they’re not. And neither are you.

5. Listen to alot of music! Sounds weird, but this helps alot. What I did was make a playlist of all my favorite songs [both happy and sad] whenever a sad one comes on, I reflect. When a happy one comes on I sing and smile. This is a very rewarding form of therapy.

6. Confide in others. In the past you might have put others on the backburner! Commit to never doing that again! First you. Then your family. Then your friends. Then the people that you see around you. Devote yourself to something, especially other people. Don’t be afraid to be open with your emotions.

7. Never give up. I know that moving on seems absolutely impossible right now. Trust me, it is possible to let go and move on. It takes time. I know you don’t want to hear that. I hate knowing it takes time. But courage takes time. Even when things seem dark and horrible you have just got to keep holding on. You are strong enough to make it work no matter how weak you feel.

All of these rules sound impossible to do. But don’t worry. If I can do it, you can do it.

of starting over is you can keep doing it because change is constant. I know it’s sad that we can’t stay on top all the time…but think of it this way if things were always the same, we’ve flatlined on our lives. Without the highs or lows, you’ve lived your life and there’s nothing to look forward to. Live in the endless possibilities…so endless that your mind didn’t even conceive it. Welcome the disruptions in your plan because it is possibility knocking at your door. Appreciate who you are now and who you can be…and who you can be and who you can be.

The hardest thing I’ve ever had to do. I’ve started over more times than a 19 year old should have to. From leaving the only friends I had ever known behind, when I stopped doing drugs at age 15—to the year long struggle of getting over my abusive ex-boyfriend. It is such an amazing feeling to be my own person. I’m no longer controlled by a substance or a boy.. I am my own.

I am very romantic at heart. I want someone who will romanticize me. Thank goodness for Johanna because she taught me not to settle. I am perfectly fine with not having a boy and just waiting. I want things to be special. I have to be me and not change. I think I am ready for this.

My boyfriend was my bestfriend…even before we started dating. For two years we never did anything without the other. He wasn’t the most important part of my life..he was my life. We broke up about 3 months ago and I think I am over him, but I’m not completely sure. Some days are ok and some days just plain suck. Even though there is someone who i could have..i just dont move on. And I don’t know what to do

So… I have been going to counciling* and it is great. I’ve learned so much about myself. At first, I was scared of what she would think, what others would think…but now Im OK with it. It doesnt matter what people think. Its all about how you feel. In a way…Im starting my life over kinda…becuase I am learning ways to deal with everything(stress, being a teenager!, school, time, ect.) and how to have better realtionships (with my mom, friends, ect.), you know…that kind of thing. Its amazing how much I think I have changed. In a way…I am a new person, and its great. —I feel kinda retarded posting this but oh well. I dont care.

the grass is always greener, i have started over, not by my own choice and it can be a rocky experience. good can come out of it but running away is not always as good an option as dealing with what makes you unhappy as you are!

i just recently broke apart from a guy i have been with for 8 and a half months. we have been apart for 8 months and we were still talking…everything changed. he said he doesnt want to talk to me anymore and to get over him. my heart was broken into more peices than i can count…but i am starting to get over him, finally. that is something to talk about

im going to stop falling for guys that don’t want me…and quite possibly move as there seems to be no one here 4 me. New place new people new beginning.

We have been apart for about 2 months now. He broke up with me, asked me back every day since and up until 3 weeks ago he was speaking to me. I was really there for him helping him out when he wanted to chat etc. Then he meets this girls 6 years younger than me, obviously just a fling/rebound whatever and now he doesnt want anything to do with me. I am finding it harder to get over him now because he isnt being as nice or what ever and always annoying me because I want to move on – IT was a bad relationship but why just leave me hanging now cause he has moved on when I was always there for him?!