have the courage to start over

I ‘ve come to this point..where I feel kind of lost.
It’s hard to explain because I thought I had it all, but the problem was that I never value what I had. And now that I’m alone I just want to have everything back.

I need to start over.
New friends, new boyfriend, new job, new heart & mind…..
New everything .

And for the very first time, have the life I always wanted, I just hope I have the courage to start over; I know I can do it.

My life is not perfect, never has been. But I love it none the less. I will not start all over, I will continue with more focus, motivation and drive then I ever thought I had. I don’t want to start over. I my not be at the finished line of this race but, I work far far to hard to get where I am to give up and start over now. Thank you for making me see that I don’t want to start over, I want to start again.

I need to make a new life for myself. Away from him. But how?

So Far so Good.
Im only seventeen years old, so it would be quite an extremity to completely start over, what possessed me to do this goal, was like a few of you after a break up, i forgot who i was in a year and a half of being with someone else, so i started over as in starting me over again, to resurface some of the old me before him and also to become the person i should of been had it not been for him.

I re-did my hair which is always a fantastic start i personally believe, and i put reminders of him away in my closet, as i relised chucking letters ect away is stupid as they were good times but im not going to read them until im way older. ive also started swimming and hoping to get back into dancing. getting fit is also my next agenda. i started over by going to college, and thats going ace to with new friends but still in touch with old important ones. ive learned of late if you want something you really have to go for it, life doesnt always work the way you want but you can sure put your all into trying.

My story is a long one… just like all of yours..
Every details matter to me.. every second.. every thought in my mind brings more pain to my heart..
I need to start over.. my life is in a big mess.
I have a great job, family, looks, everything… but I am emotionally devastated.. I dont feel that I am good enough for him ( my ex ) ..
We stayed together for 5 years and it took too much energy of me.. we broke up about 1 year and a half but I am still not over him..
I still feel that he is the perfect guy… it’s so devastating..
I need to start over

There are rules to doing this:

1. Accept the past. Don’t keep belittling yourself and telling yourself all the things you could have differently. If you could go back in the past things would have just ended up how they are now anyway, regardless of all the differences you would have attempted to make. Just let go of the past and focus on the present.

2. Start over for yourself and for no one else. Put yourself first and foremost. If you’re not ready to start over with someone and they want you to, don’t give into their pressure. Start over because YOU want to. Not because other people want you to.

3. Learn to love yourself and your mistakes. I’m still working on this one and it’s REALLY hard! While accepting others is very rewarding, accepting yourself and loving yourself is much much more. It sounds hard to do, I know, but it is possible. I promise.

4. Find someone BETTER. Find someone who not only meets your standards, but surpasses them! Don’t have low standards! Tell yourself you deserve better than you’ve ever had. While saying this, however, learn that not everyone is perfect. When you meet someone don’t flat out convince yourself that they’re perfect. Because they’re not. And neither are you.

5. Listen to alot of music! Sounds weird, but this helps alot. What I did was make a playlist of all my favorite songs [both happy and sad] whenever a sad one comes on, I reflect. When a happy one comes on I sing and smile. This is a very rewarding form of therapy.

6. Confide in others. In the past you might have put others on the backburner! Commit to never doing that again! First you. Then your family. Then your friends. Then the people that you see around you. Devote yourself to something, especially other people. Don’t be afraid to be open with your emotions.

7. Never give up. I know that moving on seems absolutely impossible right now. Trust me, it is possible to let go and move on. It takes time. I know you don’t want to hear that. I hate knowing it takes time. But courage takes time. Even when things seem dark and horrible you have just got to keep holding on. You are strong enough to make it work no matter how weak you feel.

All of these rules sound impossible to do. But don’t worry. If I can do it, you can do it.

of starting over is you can keep doing it because change is constant. I know it’s sad that we can’t stay on top all the time…but think of it this way if things were always the same, we’ve flatlined on our lives. Without the highs or lows, you’ve lived your life and there’s nothing to look forward to. Live in the endless possibilities…so endless that your mind didn’t even conceive it. Welcome the disruptions in your plan because it is possibility knocking at your door. Appreciate who you are now and who you can be…and who you can be and who you can be.

The hardest thing I’ve ever had to do. I’ve started over more times than a 19 year old should have to. From leaving the only friends I had ever known behind, when I stopped doing drugs at age 15—to the year long struggle of getting over my abusive ex-boyfriend. It is such an amazing feeling to be my own person. I’m no longer controlled by a substance or a boy.. I am my own.

I am very romantic at heart. I want someone who will romanticize me. Thank goodness for Johanna because she taught me not to settle. I am perfectly fine with not having a boy and just waiting. I want things to be special. I have to be me and not change. I think I am ready for this.

My boyfriend was my bestfriend…even before we started dating. For two years we never did anything without the other. He wasn’t the most important part of my life..he was my life. We broke up about 3 months ago and I think I am over him, but I’m not completely sure. Some days are ok and some days just plain suck. Even though there is someone who i could have..i just dont move on. And I don’t know what to do