I’m done! And we have a baby girl. She’s the cutest I’ve ever met ^ ^ 8 months ago

As the saying goes: “Don’t make someone a priority in your life when you’re only an option in theirs”

I’ve had a hard time with this lately. Lee and I now know the fate of our relationship (which is separate from each other) which I always knew, but was in constant denial of. It really is a tragic thing when we get along so well and love each other so much, we’ve just had a lot of issues.
Lee has been really struggling wanting to be in a relationship and it’s completely tainted our relationship. He is very focused on becoming the best drummer he can be and feels that he should be alone.

What made this more of a problem was that this was something he didn’t mention to me and it started taking a toll on our sex life. He thought this way increasingly more all the time and would avoid having sex with me and rarely showed affection towards me which made me considerably depressed and cry at the drop of a hat. After countless times of rejecting me, I finally broke down and told him I couldn’t do this anymore. I told him how important it was to be for him to affectionate towards me and that without it, I was not feeling love in this relationship and couldn’t do it anymore. I left spontaneously on a bus the next morning to Montreal with a friend so we could both think things out.

We’ve talked it out since then and have been completely honest with each other of why these things have happened. We agreed that when I go visit my parents (which is where I am now)he will move out while I’m gone. This is such so hard because neither of us really wants it but it’s what’s best.

We held each other and cried in eachother’s arms all day. It was a very sad thing. That was the first time in so long that he actually showed genuine affection towards me and made REAL love to me.

The Beatles were wrong when they said “All you need is love” They were so wrong it makes me sick. Lee and I have so much love for each other but its not enough!! I need to be a priority in his life which he’s not willing to make me, and although he loves me a lot, he wants to live his career out to the fullest and thinks the best way of doing so is to be alone.
He told me that this is the best relationship he’s ever been in and he’s never been more connected to anyone that he has to me and I feel the same way. I’ve never had anyone who I felt completely comfortable to be naked around, I am 100% honest with him, and more. We’ve had a really special relationship and taught each other a lot. I feel like I’m missing a limb without him -I’m no longer whole. This is going to sting for a while. I’m not okay with this.

Fuck you Lennon/McCartney 13 months ago

I’m in love. 17 months ago

What happens when your love has an expiry date?
What happens when you live with that someone and you love them more and more because you don’t have choice. You don’t even have a say in the matter, your heart’s just a machine doing what its meant to do.
What happens when even though you are aware of the expiry date, you gave them something that you never gave anyone else? Something that hits home physically and spiritually. Something so intimate that it removes itself from you and clings to its new host, so all you can do is watch it travel and feel alone and empty because its gone.
What happens when you want to break up to save yourself in the end but you don’t have the strength because you know the only one who can make you feel better is in the bed next to you.
What happens when you can hear them moving around?
What happens when you find out they have been holding themselves back – preserving themselves – and you’ve been depleting yourself of everything you are for that person.

What happens?
What do I do? 17 months ago

I am praying and committed to sharing my life with someone. After my boyfriend of 8 years passed away in August of 2004, I have had a really hard time opening myself up to a relationship. So, this year I started dating, smiling more, and setting my intention to the universe to fall in love again. I think I’m at my very best when I’m sharing my life with someone and as blessed as I am with great friends and family, I know a great relationship can’t be far away :) 23 months ago