be a gentleman

I may never consider this goal completed in my lifetime, but it is the root of almost all my other goals.

to prove that chivalry still exists

This is something I now live out everyday without second thought
Always room for improvement but that’s the fun part

Considering this completed, considering it’s become a major part of my life already. :D

I’ve actually been trying pretty hard at this for awhile. I know I still have quite a few things to change about myself to be a true gentleman, but I love the feeling I get from making people’s days a little bit better.

Sometime last week I had a good day with this.
I open doors for ladies of course, I stuck up for a woman in a fight, and I helped a complete stranger onto a bus when she was having difficulty.
Some people were confused, but I feel like the world is a tiny bit better now.

The source of gentlemanliness is consideration. A gentleman thinks of other’s needs and does what he can to address those needs.

A lot of people confuse gentlemanliness with dressing well, flossing daily, having an agreeable personal odor. These are just secondary manifestations of the core of gentlemanliness: consideration.

I sound like a Poindexter, I know.

more people (at least involved in my life) have been noticing, and recipricating my gentlemanship. I think it’s wonderful to see more guys opening the car doors for their girls, or standing up at the table when a woman enters or exits the vacinity. i honestly hope this wave takes the country by storm.

So once again i was down at my eatry with my buddy adam. Now adam is almost a gentleman but doesn’t believe in some of the fundamental rules.

He mentioned the fact that whilst he was at his college, a lady in front of him (much in front of him) had opened a door, and waited for him to go thru. he felt insulted by this and replied to this lady’s generousity by saying “i have arms you know.” I did indeed reem him for this, for which he feels bad for now, and holds the door open whenever possible, at least in front of me.

He also doesn’t completely agree with the golden rule. This came to a shock to me. He said “hypothetically, if i were to walk down the street and some crazy lady starts to punch and kick me for no reason, i should be able to defend myself and possibly hit her back.” my reply was “I’ll kill you.” To which there was an era of silence and he said “but what if…” “i’ll kill you.” “not even if she…” “don’t hit her, or i’ll kill you.” I then went on to explain that if he didn’t have the ability to take the damage a crazy lady was dealing him, he’s a sad individual and needs to work out more, to which he replied something to the effect of “i could take it”, and i responded with “then you don’t hit her. If you can take it, you don’t need to hit back, and if you hit back… i’ll kill you.” He now sees the light and agrees with me.

He’ll never be a true gentleman, but it is nice that he falls somewhere betwixt gentleman and a rather nice bloke. More twixt gentleman, but he’ll never quite be one. At least there is someone else i can add on my mental list of “Gentleman apprentices”... as it were.

I father is a farmer, and wasn’t really around too much when i was growing up. I got to know him when i was about 14 and could relate somewhat to him. However one thing he told me one day stuck with me, in the front of my mind everyday. He said “J.T., there aren’t enough scrupulous people in the world today. I was raised to be a gentleman, and so will you. There are 5 rules to follow:
1) A gentleman is curtious. This follows in all aspects of life. If you see someone in need of help, help them. Don’t be a prick, don’t lie. etc.
2) A gentleman kisses but doesn’t tell. If a lady wishes to tell someone, let her. Don’t deny, and be proud (not cocky) but don’t speak about it.
3) A gentleman speaks only when spoken to. Don’t become that loud person everyone wishes would be quiet. Just listen if possible, you’ll learn more.
4) A gentleman always holds a door open for a lady. Sometimes a lady will feel this is an insult, don’t let this get to you… you’re just being nice and she probably just had a hard day. It only takes 10 seconds out of your day, so just do it. (I personally have been slapped in the face about a dozen times for holding the door, but i keep doing it because i believe what my dad said)
5) The fifth and GOLDEN rule of being a gentleman! You never, ever, under any circumstance… be it life or death, you choose death… Never do you hit a woman. Ever!”

My father and I don’t get along very often, but i respect and love the man more than any other. I will strive to be a gentleman until I die, i know it’ll make someone happy.