not have children

ok so i have seriously considered this.. i am anti-life..
i feel that it is wrong to bring children into this world.. not only that there is enough fucking humans wandering around why should i make more?
i feel that society brainwashes you into wanting to have kids..
i would really like to get my reproductive system rearranged so that if a slip up happens i will definitely not fall pregnant.. not only is it a practical decision i feel that cosmetically my insides will look better ha yeah im fucking kidding about that one but ill do what it takes to tie those tubes it is my body and i feel that i should be doing something about it now before my future self caves in on the thought of children..
i believe that people with children are stupid..
i believe if i have a child i will be stupid..
i think it is wrong to bring someone into this world without their say in the matter..

Ive had this mind set since as far back as i can remember… i didn’t want them then, and i don’t want them now. i would rather travel the world, be a mentor for others. people think this is a HAVE to in life.. and i don’t. there is how many billion people here now, and there is just so much food that can be produced. on another note, i don’t think i could ever handle dealing with them all the time. ... i just would rather have a girlfriend/wife that will explore the world with me, and live happily ever after like in some romantic movie..

But anyway.

No reason to have this goal on my list, it’s not a current question in my life after all, so making room for other things and just simplifying my list. :)

Ugh, all my friends are having kids and are miserable. I miss them but I am a lot happier than them…

(not that it would by any means be a current issue even if I had changed my mind which I haven’t, by the way) A friend of mine, same age as me, gave birth to a baby boy on Monday and even though I had had time to adjust to that (after all, 9 months is a long time) it still hit me pretty hard when I realised a new life had actually been born and delivered to this world. I mean, a new life, a living, breathing person whose growth and development I’ll get to follow. (I was asked to be one of the boy’s godparents, though technically I’m not a godmother, since I don’t belong to the church anymore – is there a word in the English language for a person like that ^{luottoaikuinen in Finnish}?)

I don’t want a child of my own and I don’t think I’m that good with children in general, but I’m thrilled about this new life that has become a part of my world as well. I sincerely want to be a part of that baby’s life and who knows, maybe I’ll learn something from him too, if nothing else then hopefully at least ways to deal with children better. :D

I don’t know though, I’m not as “radical” concerning not having children as I was when I was younger. Maybe, and I stress the word maybe, with the right kind of person and when life would be otherwise organised I might reconsider. Truth to be told, it’d be beyond interesting to see how genes from two people mixed and what the “result” (shame on me, talking about babies as a part of some research :D) would be like. It’s just that I hate the thought of being pregnant. I don’t want to, so if I could have a baby without having to carry it myself for 9 months (and going trough the delivery), I’d be more willing to consider actually becoming a mother. I know there are ways, but since this really isn’t a current issue, I’m not going to go into them now. :)

fathead really wants babies. i might have to rethink this goal.

I’ve felt like this since middle school and every time I tell someone I don’t want to have children, I get to hear the same thing in different variations: “You’ll change your mind when you’re older.” I do understand that I’m young and opinions change and all that jazz, but when exactly am I old enough to actually know that I don’t want children, then? What people don’t get is that pregnancy disgusts me more than anything else, there’s no way I could ever imagine myself giving birth to a child. Other people being pregnant doesn’t bother me at all, though, so it’s not like pregnancy in general is something gross, just me having a child.

Sometimes I’ve thought about adoption, but single parents don’t get adoption privileges that easily and I’m so convinced that I’ll spend the most of my life alone. :D Anyway, I don’t think I’d make a good mother, I’m too self-absorbed and I just want to concentrate on myself, rather than on a baby. That probably sounds very ignorant, but I’ve always been like that.

I don’t know, maybe I’ll think differently in 10 years, but then again I might not, since I’ve thought like this for the past 5 years or so. This is such a huge thing though, and it can’t be taken lightly. And nothing’s permanent.

love kids, but I cannot have my own. will just have to love all of yours more! :)

I come from a dysfunctional home and I have raised my two little brothers. That was enough crying and helplessness (both mine and their) for a lifetime.