We married 9/04/04. All was good til’ we got home from getting married and TROUBLE with his teenager began. I was WARNED from several.I feel and felt like I was ALWAYS ( and still am) put on the back burner or a mat,maid etc. I was working 45 + hrs and doing EVERYTHING else as well.His daughter had 0 rules NONE whatsoever. Come in at 3-4 am not a problem. Well at 16-17 it is a BIG problem escp. when you missed 52 days of school in your 12th yr. In jail twice etc. Dad doesnt see a problem!.I tried and tried to give a chore and well I was ALWAYS told to f…o.. And dad NEVER once scoulded her for that.So with ALL nonsence I felt like I didnt matter to him, on New yrs I kissed my ex and he say it. And to this day still says he cant trust me. WAIT!! gets better. For 13 months he kept a secret/lie from me, I found out he was doing ice. Never heard of it called that.So 13 months he lied to me,my family,his family and MOST of all GOD. A week later I was so HURT and UPSET I tried to kill myself. Woke up 2 days later and DIDNT know where I was. Needless to say I sought treatment. Its been 10 month now and STILL sober. I started to DRINK to forget all the CRAP that was and is going on here. I am sober now and I know what I did was WRONG in Gods eyes. I forgave him for hiding it from me, and it got worse all around. Lost jobs, cant pay bills, bankruptsy ETC..And going through ALL of this we wants out. He is 49 and I am 37. I have a son who is almost 16 and he knows whats right and wrong un-like his daughter. She moved out 3 wks ago b/c I WOULDNT let her b/f stay here. She is 17 and he is 22 and is colored.I am not predgist, but I have my beliefs. So of course I am to blame from her as well as my husband.Even though he doesnt like it either. He told her never again, and 2 days later I find them sleeping in her bed vs. the couch. She HAS done and tried EVERTHING in her power to BREAK us apart and has done so on his part. ITS not what I want, I think he OWES me a marriage, a SOBER/CLEAN one. B/C I have NEVER known him clean, hes been doing ice for almost 4 1/2
years now.Plus weed as well, his daughter as well. He gets it from her at times too.
I LOVE him and I dont want this to end b/c of drugs or his daughter, but remember I am to BLAME for EVERYTHING..Please give me some advice…
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I FEEL cheated out of my Marriage..
3 years ago
