finish my writing course

I finally picked this up again. I finished the chapter I was not looking forward too and it made me feel good.

I forgot about this. I should do the assignment I don’t want to finish tomorrow. I should. I mean I will.

I’m late for turning in assignment six. And I have no ambition to get it going either. I don’t know if it’s just a writing block, or lack of interest in the assignment, or maybe lack of interest in the course. I fear this goal will soon be given up on. But if it is, and I do get some money back for my enrollment in the course, perhaps I’ll find something I have more interest in completing.

I’m worried about my lack of interest in this lately. I feel very much like I’m trying to force myself to do it. And it’s been this way from the start. I took an interest in the course because I was always told I should be a writer, and children’s literature just seemed like the kind of writing I’d be into. From the beginning I haven’t been doing things properly. I complete assignments at the last minute, rarely doing proper rough drafts, and never doing the extra reading and writing they ask you do in between assignments. Not to mention the fact I haven’t picked any of this up since last march. I was given the choice to try again or quit by March 3rd, and choose to try again. But every time I sit down with assignment five, nothing gets done. I like to write. But maybe online schooling just isn’t right for me….seeing as I lack the motivation it requires.

I’ve posted my final short story and that is the end. In one sense the mark I get isn’t important – I’ve gotten what I wanted out of the course. However of course I would love it if other people enjoyed my work.

I won’t get comments on the final piece, only a mark, so it’s not going to be useful apart from as a slightly arbitrary mark of progress. I’m comfortable closing this goal off with that in mind.

What have I learnt? That I am a talented writer, and the harder I work the more talented I get; :-) that writing is a process, not an end goal; that high quality feedback is so important when you are learning a new skill; that expressing myself is not so hard when I have a bigger toolbox to dip into. I’m sure there will be more as I get some perspective over the summer.

So, I’m proud of myself. Well done my friend. Onwards!

I’ve taken my 5500-word draft down to 3500 words, and today I’ve reduced it to 2789 words :-) I’m in to the final stages now – trimming, neatening, polishing, making the whole thing shine.

I also went back through my journal and typed up all the notes I’ve been making ready for the commentary. So that’s another 1500 word draft done and dusted. I’ll reduce that one when the story is finished.

I’ve also started the transition to after the course is done. Once this assignment is submitted, that will be it. It’s going to be really strange to not have deadlines, and really easy to jump straight into another course to fill the void. It’s going to be another summer of playful confusion. Writing? Music? Something else?

I’ve two weeks to work on it, then into the post it goes and that is that. I’ll get my final TMA mark back on Monday/Tuesday. I can’t believe a year has gone by. I guess it hasn’t – 9 months really – but I’m starting to think about what I’m going to do next. Music or writing? Or both?

I’ve completed my final TMA – it’s sitting on my (backed up!) hard drive percolating before I give it one last check. So I can concentrate on my ECA. I’m reading Neil Jordan’s first book of short stories, “Night in Tunisia” and there is lots to inspire me in there style-wise. My 5000 word fragmentary draft 0.9 is going to be re-written as 1st draft 1.0 in 3000 words max. That’ll give me some cutting room for the re-write.

Sat with a cup of coffee on campus earlier I saw how I could show all the stuff I was telling in my fragments, a real eureka moment. I love it when that happens!

For my final portfolio piece, I’m up to 4269 words and there are lots of scenes I want to write still to come. I wonder if this might become a short novel? I don’t want to second guess myself though. I’m committed to seeing what the story becomes before I begin to think too critically. Even a 10000 word story might be edited down to the 2500 word limit. Keep generating until there is nothing left to say.

I have a very messy first draft of my final piece of work on the course – the one that’s worth 50% of everything. My tenses are all over the place, some of it is telling, there are some snatches of conversation. But at least it’ all on paper.

The other piece is two thirds there – I have two poems finished, but I need one more, and then of course there’s the research of potential publications…

The end is most definitely in site.