Last time I’d seen him was at my mom’s funeral. He was completely torn apart. They’re marriage may have failed, but a long time ago, they were best friends.
I’m starting to learn about the whys and hows of the two of them… but not directly from my dad. My sister gets emails from him, and talks to me about it.
I went back to visit the family again, and see Mom’s tree at the cemetery. On Saturday, I asked Dad to join us for dinner. It was me and D, two of my sisters, one bro-in-law, my nephew, my dad and his wife, and then my step-sister who I see maybe once a year, and her two daughters.
Dad talks a lot. I am trying to get him to dress up piratey for my piratey wedding, although I will except it if he won’t. See, I know he’s uncomfortable in suits, but I don’t know how he feels about costumes… anyway, I asked him to walk me down the aisle. He insisted, with a straight face, that he will dress as a Time Pirate, and where silver tights. My step-mom promises not to let him dress himself.
Dad doesn’t laugh much. He has a sense of humor that I understand, but don’t stick to as religiously… it’s absurd, and requires the highest level of dead-pan delivery. It’s important not to react to humorous situations. Outsiders find it maddening. Even I sometimes wonder if I’ve just said something totally stupid. There’s no telling.
He told some cop stories at lunch, which reminded me that I can’t wait for him to stop talking to get up and leave… we were at a buffet, and Dad likes to talk. He doesn’t notice when we start to ignore him.
D entered a rite of passage – he was left alone with my dad while the rest of us got up to get something to eat. I didn’t mean for it to happen, but sooner or later it was going to.
Later I asked D, “So, what did my dad talk at you about while we were getting seconds?”
“Oh… how we could use a depression right now, but not a big one. Just enough of one to give us character.”
“Now that one… I think he means that.”
