manage my social anxiety

I’m off of all meds for the first time since 2006. I went off cold turkey (August 2009) and suffered greatly with hot flashes, memory loss, confusion, acne, and other things for at least two weeks.

Those symptoms have gone away, but I’m struggling to cope with my anxiety. I have good days and bad days, but the weight gain that prompted me to go off and the withdrawal symptoms make me not want to try anything else. I’m currently taking a multi B vitamin complex. I’m not sure if it’s working, but I’ll continue taking them for a while.

Meanwhile, I’ll have to be very aware of my moods and what I say to people. It’s as exhausting as I remember.

I’ve continued taking my medication and I’ve seen consistent results with my social anxiety. It isn’t totally gone, but every time I tell people I’m shy (out of habit) they’re very surprised and ask, “REALLY??” I forget that I’m not a wallflower anymore. I actually approach people and initiate conversations.

I have moments when I want to be alone, but I guess that’s how normal people are.

I still feel a bit of hesitancy when going into a social situation, but I don’t always let it stop me from socializing. Sometimes it does, though, but I don’t feel as isolated as I used to.

has really helped with this.

A wise young woman once said, “I’ll just be myself and see who shows up.”

That’s what I think I’ll do. It’s too hard pretending to be someone else. I’ll stop trying to be who I think everyone wants to be. Nobody liked her anyway. She wasn’t very happy.

I fear I will feel left out in a group situation. I will try to put myself on the line more. I have to risk betrayal and feeling left out because continued isolation is the price I will pay otherwise. If you keep doing the things the same way you’ve been doing them the outcome doesn’t change. I’ll take more chances socially.

One of the reasons that I shy away from getting close to people is because I fear betrayal. I have to trust myself to be able to handle betrayal.

I’ve battled with social anxiety for a long time, but I’ve been lucky that I’ve been able to gradually reduce it over time. I’ve learned that my goal isn’t to “get rid” of the social anxiety because that is too high of an expectation and would be opposite of my nature. My goal is to live with it and accept myself with it. I know the more I get to know someone and trust them, the less anxious I am. So I will not get rid of it because anxiety is a normal reaction. I just want to not let it take over my life.