learn how to make friends

new here so be gentle :P

.. on my medication again now that I can afford it. Just spoke to several people outside at work. Will continue to smile, wave and attempt small chit chat at work and while I am at stores.

Read over this site:
http://www.succeedsocially.com

Will continue to absorb this site. I need to work on this goal. It would seem that covering a larger breadth of knowledge, especially current events, may help me succeed here. Living in the south I may have to force myself to like college football. I spoke to someone yesterday about the Pittsburg win. Usually I don’t even keep up with pro football, but football is not only a religion in Texas, it is in Georgia too it would seem. Guess I might have to suck it up :)

Today my group from the university got together for coffee. Two of my friends are living for about half a year. And another friend from our group contacted everyone to steal a place and time. She didn’t contact me. (We are a big group and sometimes there are people that are not contacted by mistake). I send a message to another friend asking what she was going to do tonight. She asked if I was going to the coffee, I said I didn’t know about it. She told me to come. I said I didn’t feel comfortable going. What is kind of stupid, if those people weren’t that close to me I would have gone. They important to me, it make me feel awful that they didn’t remember me. I guess I hoped that they at least would send me a message or something when that realized that they had forgotten me, but nothing.

I don’t know if I’m an alien for needing people to show that they care. I have so many problems believing that people can actually like me for what they see. I don’t feel that people would actual miss me.

.. working on this one again, too. I’m all over the place aren’t I?..

My friends pictured in the entries below have all become distant because of changes that have happened in our lives over the last few years. There are many more than what is pictured below, though, and those friends have become distant as well. Some have divorced, others have moved, others have had children, others are attmepting to buy a house even ( trying to save money ). Then there is me; I now work at night. So, we have become more distant. Or, at least, I feel like I have become more distant from them.

Anyway, my comfort zone was too comfortable with them. I need to continue “exposure”. This is in psychology is what breaks the trend of anxiety – slow exposure. In my particular case it could also help to develop more refined social skills, such as better small talk. I usually ask blunt questions and answer them just as bluntly. I rarely effuse. It is helpful in the professions I have had to ask very direct questions and I have become very acustom to this as a way of communicating.

I went out on Thursday, Friday and Saturday and tried my damnest to talk up the places I was at. The best result I had was at Breakers Music Hall on Saturday. I sat in one place most of the night and talked to about half the people in there at some point or another. I had alot of fun. I also had some girl hit on me… I think..

It’s difficult being lonely with seemingly no one to talk to. That might be why I get so involved in online communities. In fact, who am I kidding, it IS why I get so involved in online communities.

Oh well, gotta keep going.

Kim

I love Stacey!

Ever since going on Effexor I’ve become a little better.

This is the main reason why I’m so damned depressed. I go blank in social situations. I wish I could be more talkative with interesting things to say. I wish I could seem calm, cool, suave and humorus. I’ve identified this as a goal towards defeating depression.

Really, I have quite a number of friends, it’s just that I’ve always made friends through friends. I’ve never been very good with people. Where I do go I tend to be fairly well liked.

What depresses me is that I tend to get along with those much older than me, much easier. Just last night I sat at a dinner table discussing the merits of music that was written in ALL CASES before I was born. It’s not that I dislike my friends. They love me quite dearly I can tell, and the feeling is requited. I just have so few my own age anymore. They sit around jibing about old stories and I have none.