be a "knock-out" for my husband

I want to lose about thirty to forty pounds this year. By the end of this year, I want to be able to fit into a sexy piece of lingerie without being self-conscious and without looking like an overstuffed sausage (or cow) in a skimpy outifit.

I haven’t bought a decent piece of lingerie in almost four years. I guess it comes with the territory sometimes.

Sometimes, I just feel like a “lump” when it comes to my husband. I want to lose weight and tone up. Then I want to redevelop that sense of purpose that I once had in my life. I feel awkward with him sexually because I am not what I once was. I feel almost like a blob. He says he loves me and calls me “sexy”. However, sometimes I wonder if he thinks of better for himself.