Curb the cynical, sarcastic pessimist inside me

with this goal, until last week when 1 of my closest friends let me down big time. Every time I start to trust someone they let me down. Is it any wonder I’m cynical and pessimistic??

I’m just not getting anywhere with this goal! I can’t help but see the worst in people, it’s just how I’ve been brought up

I don’t feel like I’m going anywhere with this. I know I have a deeper goal that this one points toward it but there’s something about this expression of it that just isn’t working for me.

working on this one….it has to be the most difficult out of all my goals!

I’m not quite there where I wanted but I’m getting back to my senses now lol hopefully… just trying to stay away from Machado de Assis books lol

Just saying, “Curb the cynical, sarcastic pessimist inside me” has a certain ring that keeps it in my head.

But I have to say that my cynical sarcastic pessimist can sometimes be pretty amusing, lending pearls of wisdom like, “Yeah, this sucks, get over it.”

So I suppose I should refine my goal to curbing the cynical sarcastic pessimist inside of me from expressing itself negatively. Sounds good…

I think I could honestly say I’ve done this if I could get through momentary setbacks for the most part without slamming into depression and negativity. I’ve already beaten a lot of other patterns…this one is, I think, the next biggie, and the inner pessimist’s last real chokehold on me.

I used to be a very optimistic person who just saw good in everything. I could see the bad, the danger, yes, but it was always balanced by the good. But that was many years and many traumas ago.

Still, I’m on my way. I’ve already sliced it down to a fraction of what it used to be. I’ll get there. I’ll be who I was intended to be again.

I didn’t realize I had done this until I read it and I thought, Hey! That used to be me! Couldn’t tell you what changed it, or when, but I see so much more of the good in people than I once did.

Could have something to do with the fact that I don’t work retail anymore. ;)