During class we were made to put our homework up on the wall for a group crit, after the teacher pointed out and briefly discussed mine I reluctantly owned up to being the creator of said piece.

Reluctantly being the operative word, because my lack of confidence encouraged the teacher to then pull me to the front to talk about my work. It wasnt all bad… I didnt die! But it has taught me that to avoid this in future I have to be proud of what I do and unafraid to own up to it.

As unsure as I was, there was nothing wrong with my work and in the field I want to get into, I need to get used to talking about what Ive done in front of people… harder said than done because I find that as an introvert, I am massively considerate and prefer to observe and listen, I find it hard to articulate myself on the spot and especially make small talk or big talk.

I like to think. A LOT. Then I write things down. Talking is not my strongest point, I work in different ways that other people cannot begin to fathom… Its not wrong but its not what is recommended either. 7 months ago

My internship.

So Ive been spending a few days a week at a studio. Its been over a month now but I feel increasingly like Im being used. Now I understand I am there to do whatever they deal me, but sometimes I feel my responsibilities outweigh my position and as Im not being credited nor paid, I find it a little hard to accept.

Although I would probably benefit from talking myself up as I tend to sound unsure when showing them my work- most of the time thinking that what Im doing is pretty straightforward because if I can do it chances are other people can too, (which is probably only half true). However my boss seems really pleased with my abilities and my progress especially since theyre keeping me on indefinitely.

But thats the other thing, I don’t know how long they want me there for and Ive come to the point where I feel I need to really focus on my uni work before it really suffers. I tried to be assertive and discuss it with them earlier but ended up no closer to understanding where I stand and agreeing to go in next week. Bah! 13 months ago