Live less inside my own head

This “problem” isn’t really part of the public imagination so I’m heartened to see there are other people who feel this way.

I haven’t been able to figure out whether this is a natural predisposition or a habit. I’m depressed and I feel this way, so I wonder whether the constant ruminating causes the depression or the other way around, has anyone developed this idea?

My best guess is that negative self image or some general insecurity is usually at the root of the problem, once you deal with your problem by either reforming some behavior or reconstructing some expectation you’ll definitely be in a batter position to stop thinking so much. But I think you have to make a conscious effort to stop thinking (not too conscious) as well.

@other comments on here:
I’m “hot” and I do this to the extreme that I’ll get mad at a real person for interupting my internal monologue with an imaginary future person or remembered real person. It doesn’t have anything to do with what you look like on the outside; I bet there’s some jacked psychology involved. But yeah, focusing on paying acute attention to what you are actually doing at the moment helps, or forcing your thoughts to do a running dialogue play-by-play of the tea brewing instead of remembering a conversation you had when you were 12, going ‘I SHOULD have said this’ then they would have said ‘This’ and I would’ve gone ‘Oh’ all cool like… because then some real person watching you brew the tea will say, “What ‘oh’, did you get the wrong flavor tea?” Then – startled – you’ll say “What?”

Exactly.

my life is screwd by dreaming too much ,, i want to stop this for good i thought i was the only only one in this world to have this problem but since i found out that im not the only one .. i think it will be easier ..

So this is something i definetly need to do. Its disconnects me from actually living in the moment and enjoying myself. What should be done is not stop dreaming but MAKE it happen. I know this but i am only kinda wondering how exactly. Like whenever i am doing something i picture how i want the whole evening to go, the things i will say and how people respond. But it nevers happens the way i imagined it never happens at all.

I have already live a lifetime in my head, I have gotten married, had kids, have the career I want, I have been around the world, I have been rich and famous, have the perfect body, and the perfect husband ALL IN MY HEAD!! I have miss half of my life living in my head. when I do this the people and things appear before me as clear as day. I speak to them and hear them answer me back. people in the real world keep asking why do I talk to myself. And in the mean time my life in the real world is passing my by. I wan to stop, how can I stop?

im really bad at this and its not good for me. i have to work on interacting with people more and being social!

Wow. I had no idea that there were so many other people that did this! I have this horrible habit of sort of hanging in the background of social situations and observing instead of interacting. Instead I choose to “recreate” certain situations in my head. This is where Im me. This is where I have the body I want, I always look fabulous, guys love me and girls envy me.

Im pretty sure this comes from me not being comfortable with my body so I tell myself “well if you were skinny it would have been like this…”. I know my life isnt going to instantly improve and its due in large part to my growing accustomed to living in my head.

When you hang in the background long enough it doesnt matter what you look like because you’ve grown comfortable there so you just stay in the background. Im working on being more confident in myself now so that when I do lose weight I will have started to be more outgoing.

This is alot harder than it seems, I do it every day…ALOT…whats more I actually enjoy it! But its no good, infact its distructive and takes the emphasis away from the real world.

I must say though… I thought that I was the only one who does this!! seems that I’m not.

Im going to be honest.. I think that I often prefer my fantasy life to my real one…not good but Im working on it of course.

for this I started reading more, in a way this is a way to escape those “thinking pocesses”.. I find reading to be helping enough, just, of course, the book should be interesting and involving :)

sometimes it seems to me that”living inside my head” starts when I am not so occupied with the work I have to do, when there is time just for sitting and “day dreaming”, well, I guess it is not so bad to dream for some time, but if that thinking becomes distructing and I notice it I try to stop that as quickly as I can.

I am trying to consciously connect with my world. Concentrate on making my cup of tea. Focus on eating my lunch. Think about what is happening in front of me and not be lost in my head or thoughts as much! I want to stop living in my head!!!!!!