After spending time with my sister’s kids again, I am happy that I don’t have kids. Don’t get me wrong, the kids are actually really kind and well behaving and beautiful and all that, but I just feel that life of that kind isn’t for me. Spending time around babies and toddlers doesn’t make me want have my own, quite opposite actually. I get annoyed with all their questions and that I would need to play with them all the time. If I would have my own kids, they would drive me nuts. I would be really lousy mum. I know that. I wonder actually why I don’t have any biological need to continue my genes. I am able to love and feel affection, it’s not that. The though of being pregnant, repulses me. The though of having children of my own, makes me feel really uneasy. I am wondering if it really is in my genes not wanting to have kids at all. Or have I managed to intentionally push down all the biological needs of reproduction that every specie has? That would mean that my biological needs weren’t that strong in the first place. I have never really wanted to have kids. It makes me also wonder why some people have so high need of reproduction. And what part society has on this? How many people actually doesn’t want to have kids but get them any way cos the society demands it?

I know that I will never be a mother and that I have a chance to do that choice makes me so happy. 2 years ago

The year is almost up. It’s been quite awhile since my last entry under this goal. So I guess I have lots to catch up. After my last entry I got my master diploma! It was great to graduate, kinda start a new chapter in my life. I’ve been so ready to get a job, but sadly no job has been ready for me. It depresses me every now and then. But I need to stay positive and right now I feel quite optimistic that I will get something. There haven’t been that many open jobs lately, but there’s few that I feel quite eager about. The other might cause a bit troubles since it’s not in Tampere. But it would be so great! Something I feel excited to do and the employer would be University of London!. But the job is in Finland. :) I also will ask from University of Tampere on trainee position.

And then I visited Hong Kong in November :) The trip was…hmm..interesting. There were positive sides and negative. I liked the warm weather, seeing my friend, enjoyed the different culture and new things. I didn’t panic in the crowds or in the airplanes (well, a few times I woke up and though that we could crash…). I had never been before in Asia or that big city. And the nature was interesting. And the people were friendly and mostly talked English. But. I hated my hostel. I hated Mong Kok. I missed Antti while I couldn’t sleep in that noisy, small room. I didn’t like that I couldn’t understand Chinese at all. I felt I didn’t belong there, cos I looked so different than others. I felt that I was stared and that I sure was a tourist. And I never have wanted to get back home as fast as there. But I am still glad that I did the trip. And even though the hostel wasn’t that great, I saw totally different side of Hong Kong that I would had seen if I would had stayed in some luxury hotel. I wish I would had a little more time to see more. So much left unseen. And I really would have wanted to see monkeys!

And then, there was another trip in December. This time to Kaunas, Lithuania. It wasn’t what I was expecting. It wasn’t the same city my sister always talked about (she lived there for 5-6 months). It was so different than other Baltic countries. I visited Kaunas briefly in spring, and it was great though get back there for more days. And the shoe shops. Oh my! All those shoes, cheaper than in Finland. All my size. However, with Ryanair, I couldn’t take too many of them home with me. I only bought one pair. I also got sick during the trip and the last day I only slept in our hotel room and waited to get home. But overall, the trip was fun!

And then the latest news….We got the apartment! ♥ Finally.

Next year sure will be interesting. :) 2 years ago

Fifteen entries in nine months and no entries during the last four months or so – there’s obviously no point in having this goal on my list any more. 2 years ago

I missed again my anniversary in 43T! I was planing to celebrate it here since I missed it last year, and year before that and so on…But Friday was good day anyway :)

4 years in 43T! Thanks for every advice and help I have gotten and I thanks for all the great guys who I have met here and also in real life :) Thanks for being part of my life and taking time to read my writings here. ♥ Hugs! 2 years ago

September huh? The summer went quite fast indeed. And in Saturday, my waiting is going to end. Well at least part of the waiting. I am still waiting for my thesis to get approved, still waiting for getting a job, still waiting for everything settle down…Lots of waiting left. I wish that I could just take it easy and not stress anything at all. But I seriously need a job cos I don’t have that much money left. And I want to get starting to do something that I have wanted to do so long: work for environment and nature. I guess everything will be fine, eventually. And would it really be that bad to be unemployed for awhile?

I finished the first Sookie Stackhouse- book. It was quite different than the tv show, but it was good anyhow. But I quite like how they have added stuff for the show to make it more exciting. I guess if I would have read the book first, I wouldn’t feel the same! Vampire Diaries starts again too! I’m really excited about that. And Supernatural too, but I am not so sure will I like it, cos the season will be different.

I feel that I am a bit failure. I promised to my self and Antti as well that I would be in good shape in end of the summer. But I am not. I am a bit better now, but much more still needs to be done. Summer was so hot that it was hard to do anything exercise without fainting. Now with the cooler weather, I have done a bit more. 2 years ago

I can’t believe summer is already over. Usually autumn lurks the summer and takes it over little by little, but now the change in the wather has happened quite quickly. Just two weeks ago it was + 30 C and now it’s hardly + 10 C! But actually the cold breeze feels quite nice, that’s if you are wearing warm clothes enough. I have hardly used any jacket during this abnormal summer. And I don’t have much idea where all my jackets are.

I’m really waiting for all the trees showing their colours. That’s my favourite part of this season. I also like the dark nights when you can gaze the stars. And then snuggle with your love and drink hot chocolate.

This autumn will be so different for me. No more going back to school. But I feel quite calm now. Even though there are bunch or uncertain things in my head. My life isn’t that bad. I actually like being myself. All is good. And everything will be all right if it isn’t already. There are so many exciting things coming at me at full speed. All I have to do is catch them. 2 years ago

I am planing my trip to Hong Kong! I noticed that I am starting to run out of time with buying the tickets. They are getting more and more expencive every day :/ I will buy them next thing right when I get back home. I cannot now, cos I think I might need to inform all kind of passport information ect. I hope that I will get them less than 700€. I actually found tickets under 600 € as well, but I am afraid that I won’t find them anymore next week. I also need to find somekind of accommodation for my stay, but I will worry that later.

I am quite excited about this, even I know I don’t really have money to do this trip. Well I do have money, but I might need to save that for living. However I am optimistic that everything will work out somehow. This is that kind of opportunity that I don’t want to miss. I would have wanted to go there with Antti, but he cannot. We also planed to take the flights together with Emilia, but that probably isn’t possible after all. I just need to manage myself, which will be quite adventure itself! 2 years ago

It’s been happening quite lot in the past week. First I visited Laura in Helsinki :) We had really nice time together and I was so happy to meet her before she left to UK. I hope that I will get chance to go to UK to meet her too at some point. From Helsinki I went first to my sister’s home in Espoo and spent the night there. And then I continued to Turku and spend the rest of the week there with one of my best and oldest friend S. We hadn’t seen each others in a long time. So it was really nice. On Saturday we went to see Inception as well. I quite liked the movie. Though some things in it bothered me. But I think it was worth watching and I would like to see it again (so I could pay attention to other things this time). On Sunday I left Turku to Tampere (where I am right now and rest of the week as well). Emilia and Juho were nice enough to accommodate me since I seemed to have really bad luck with my other friends: two of them are away from the city and one had really bad schedule with her work so I couldn’t go to her place either. But I don’t mind spending more time with Emilia and Juho cos they both are really great company :)

We have watched movies too. And Futurama :D And today Emilia and me went to movies to see Splice, which was quite interesting. I have quite mixed feelings about it, cos I am not sure was it any good. It was quite different than I thought beforehand.

Moday we went to try pole dancing as well! It was more difficult than I thought it would be. I guess there wasn’t enough time for me to think about the moves and learn them. But I was quite fun to try it again though. I think I could easily go there again but it’s quite expensive. 2 years ago

It’s been again awhile since my last entry here. I’m still living with my parents since I don’t have a job and I don’t have any other place to go. Tomorrow I start my long trip cross the Finland :) First I go to meet Laura at Vantaa/Helsinki and then I go to my sister for night to Espoo. Then Friday I continue there to Turku to spend the weekend with my dear S. who I haven’t seen in ages! From there I continue to Tampere and stay with Emilia and Juho there who were life savers to offer me a place to stay. And I am really looking forward to see their new home :) I will meet A. at some point too. Then Friday H. comes back to town and I spend time with her. From there I continue to Jyväskylä cos I have some university related stuff that I need to take care. I won’t be able to meet M. since she won’t be in town. So quite much will happen in the next 1,5 weeks. I’m excited cos I haven’t seen any of my friends in month! And I miss them all.

Last night, well more like in the morning, I had lucid dream. I’ve been trying to get one for couple of nights and now I finally did. And it’s not hard to guess what I did when I had the power to do anything I wanted ;) I had some troubles to keep the control, but I managed quite well to stay in the lucid dream. And after that I had regular dream where I talked with Antti :) 2 years ago

Seriously. What it is with this heat? I am living in Finland. I am not used to + 30 degrees. :D And in the nights it seems it’s not colder. I think + 25 celsius degrees is enough for me. In Finnish climate I mean. Sweating all the time isn’t that nice :P

Tomorrow my niece and nephew comes here :) I hope that my nephew doesn’t fear me. He’s really shy. My sister told me that my gooddaughter is really interested about flowers now and I should teach her about them. That suits me really well. Maybe I manage to brainwash her to biologist as well :P I wis my sister would know more about plants as well. It’s shamining that she can’t name typical finnish plants and she’s my sister!

Life at my parent’s house goes alright. However I am planing already trips to other cities. I think that in two weeks from now, I will go to visit my friend at Rovaniemi. I haven’t seen her since she moved avay from Jyväskylä to study in Oulu and it would sure be swelling to meet her again :) So we just have to make it happen!

I’m feeling a bit lonely here. Since I don’t have my friend here. Today I had long talk with Antti and that eases my loneliness a bit. I though miss my friends already as well. I am quite social person and here it is nobody else to talk with than my parents. And since I don’t have nobody else to talk with, I am starting to talk about stuff with my mum. That kind of stuff we normally don’t talk about. Stuff that I talk about my girlfriends. Eh. I am getting worried about this…I think I need to socialize more in the net and 43T so I can talk here about all that stuff instead :D _{Yes, I rather tell the whole word some stuff than my mum :P}2 years ago

The whole June went so quickly! As I thought it would. Tomorrow I will move out from Jyväskylä for good. I will miss this city so much, I really felt like home here, more home than I ever felt in my childhood city. And now I am moving back to that city. :/ But only temporally. I hope that I will get a job soon or at least when it’s September I can be with Antti again and move to Tampere for awhile (until I get a job or we decided where we will go from there or do we stay). So even though it is hard to say goodbye to Jyväskylä, I am excited about the future. I am ready for the adventures and I can’t wait to see what will happen in the later part of this year.

I met my mentor today and she thinks that the thesis will be ready. I think so to. I have no idea what to write there anymore and even though I know it could have been better, I am so tired with it so I say it’s ready now. Luckily I am not perfectionist! Otherwise it would take me a long time still to finish it :P

Now I should start packing my belongings. My parents and friends are coming this evening to help move half of the stuff. So tonight will be the last night in this apartment. Yeah, it was nice 2 years here in this apartment. And it was nice 5 years in this city. But like I said, I am ready to change. I am ready to start another chapter in my life. And everything is possible. I am free to do and go where I want. And if everything goes well, I can start building my life together with my loved one soon. 2 years ago

Yesterday I had really nice evening with my friend. I was so happy when she contacted me Tuesday and asked out. I couldn’t go then so we decided to meet Thursday. I don’t much like be alone too long periods. And last weekend was so boring. Everyone seemed to be busy and out of town. Monday evening me and M. went to see Sex and the City 2. Despite what all the critics have said, I really enjoyed it. It was the perfect movie for that state of mind and I laughed a lot. And I really needed that laugh.

I have only one week left with Japanese. I haven’t done all good with it, so I doubt that I will get good grade from it. But I don’t mind. I didn’t go there to get good grades, I went there for fun. And it has been fun too. Now it’s getting more difficult cos there’s more grammar issues. But maybe I will handle them too. I need to do serious studying on the weekend. But since I don’t have any other plans, that’s ok. Today we will have a Japanese quest on our lecture. I hope she (or he) will speak something else than Japan to us as well cos I really don’t understand much Japan. I’m sure it will be interesting though.

Antti being away still upsets me. There are days when I am fine with it and then there are days when I absolute hate it. I know I could learn to be without him, but I really don’t want to be without him. I want him to be part of my life, and now I feel he’s not that much part of my life. With that time difference and the fact that he’s too busy there, we don’t talk that often. Every day there comes out something little that I would like to tell him, but when we finally are able to talk, I find all those little things too insignificant to tell about. Or I have already forgotten them. There’s still 3 months to go and I am worried. It’s stupid how much a person will do in the name of love.

I think the next 3 weeks will go quickly. I have so much to do. 2 years ago

I feel naked now. I just took off one of my piercings. And it wasn’t the one I have planed to take off for over a year. No. Even though I feel a bit sad now, I feel good at the same time. I think it was time for that piece of jewelery to go. I hope it won’t leave too big scar.

Well now that I am one piercing less, I instantly started to think about getting new one :D Maybe industrial. Or something else to my ear. Or nipples! That would be fun :D Or maybe not, I think it might hurt way too much. Or maybe I just save money now so I can some point go to get that tattoo. After all the piercing probably costs a third of that tattoo. Or even more if it’s not that common one.

_{Oh and who can guess first right what piercing I took off? :D The first who guesses right, gets a prize ;) And since I have had only 3 piercings this will be quick round! Hmm if you remember what those three were…}2 years ago

My road trip to Poland went really well. I met new nice people who I would love to meet again at some point. I saw a lot of interesting places and I would love to go back to Poland someday cos we didn’t have time to spend time much in Warsaw. I was surprised though that people really didn’t speak that much English there. They understood though German and with one man we even spoke French :D I got a flu from my trip tough and I am still suffering from it.

Last week I spend mostly with Antti cos it was final week before he left to USA. His flight was today and I got message from him that he was in Chicago. I am excited for him, but I wish I could be there too. But I am here in Finland and I need to now survive to September without him. It will be though cos I know I will miss him really badly from time to time. But I actually have a plans for the summer and funny, somehow summer seems to be too short for all the stuff :D (Yes, I think I might have second thoughts about this when it’s July or August :D) I was also thinking that I could take a trip somewhere so if some close enough 43Thingers (cos then the tickets wouldn’t cost too much) want to accommodate me and meet me, let me know :DD

The Japanese course started yesterday. It seems quite interesting, but a bit difficult. I hope I learn all the stuff. We have started quite easily, but I think it might get more faster and difficult soon. The course lasts 4 weeks.

It’s time for Eurovision song contests again. Finland didn’t make it to final, and that doesn’t surprise me :D There were though much worse songs that got in finals.

I dyed my hair with henna again. I put some Cajun seasoning it and now I can say that my hair is officially spicy :D The color came quite nice.

Tomorrow I will meet my mentor and see what I need to write more to my thesis. I hope there isn’t too much work to do anymore cos I am sick and tired for the thesis and I just want it to be ready. The whole thesis sucks anyway and I doubt it will much help me in my career. Talking about the career..I still haven’t got a job :( Though now I just want to have relaxing summer without any jobs. I still get those emails from jobs I applied where they say that they didn’t want me. That quite sucks. 2 years ago

Again it’s been a long while since the last time I wrote anything under this goal. So much has happened during the last weeks that I won’t go into details, but I wanted to give you some kind of a status update.

My plans for the summer have gotten clearer. I now know that I will be working at a poolside bar & grill at a hotel in Wisconsin Dells. I met some of my soon-to-be workmates last Friday and I have gotten to know them on Facebook. Most of the people seem to be younger than me, but I’m sure the summer will be fun and full of interesting experiences.

Studying has also taken up a lot of my time lately. There have been so many assignments and seminars that I’m honestly getting a bit fed up with all this. However, I’ve received good grades and I only have two courses left for this semester, so it’s all good.

All in all I’m doing fine at the moment. The only bigger problem is that I haven’t had much time to train martial arts or any other sports. If I don’t do sports it doesn’t take long before I start to feel bad. Fortunately this weekend a very interesting martial arts seminar will take place in Tampere and I am going to participate.

Oh yeah, the summer is coming. Today it was exceptionally warm around here (+18 C) and it should be getting even warmer during the weekend. Me likes! :-) 3 years ago

• at least 3 long sleeve shirts
• 3-4 t-shirts
• underwear
• pajamas
• towel
• soap, shampoo + other hygiene stuff
• passport!
• book about birds and plants
• camera + batteries
• binoculars
• sleeping bag and mattress, pillow
• socks
• pants
• three shoes
• money + keys 3 years ago

Today was good day. I was quite efficient. I started the say by swimming and sauna. Then I wrote a bit my thesis. For the evening I went to my friend’s place and we went to see which stuff of ours were still on the flea market. I was a bit disappointed cos none of the clothes I took there were sold :( From the books and CD’s I got though totally 16,50 €. After the table rent, I got 9,50 €. So not much…However the whole table of us sold over 50 € (my friend, her boyfriend and me had the stuff)! That was pretty good. We probably would have taken second week as well, but we both are out of the country so it wasn’t possible. I donated some of the clothes there so I didn’t needed to take them back home.

Tomorrow morning I have the last exam! Though I decided to take Japanese class in the summer too. But I feel great! I think the exam will go just fine :)

I’m quite waiting for next week! It will be awesome! I hope it won’t be too cold since we are sleeping in the tent couple of nights. I hope I get to see some European Bison’s as well! They should be in that national park.

I’m really starting to wait the summer. So I could get my thesis ready and enjoy the warm weather. Summer though means that Antti will be gone, but I think I will be just fine. I will miss him terribly and even the thought about not being able to see him or talk with him that often makes me really sad. But the same time, I am quite excited for him. I’m sure it will be a great adventure. And what it comes to me…at least I too have a lot of plans for the summer. I wish I would get job too, but if I don’t, that won’t ruin my summer either :) 3 years ago

I haven’t been very active in 43T lately. So sorry about that. I doubt though that there will be much change to that in near future, cos I simply don’t find that I have much time to just hang in there. And there isn’t much progress either to my goals. Anyway…What I have been up to?

I have right now my last course (maybe, I might take the Japanese course in summer). It’s really interesting and I feel that I am studying what I want. Though I am having my doubts was it smart to study this. I’m a bit worried about my future jobs. I feel that I don’t know much and now I should graduate and I don’t have any experience on this job field. Enthusiasm and love for nature can get me only to half way there. It might not be enough. I’m just so done with studying right now and I don’t think getting myself Ph.D will help me either. So I won’t continue my studies after this. At least not now.

I am getting tired of this long distance relationship. I cannot wait to move in with A. I will survive for that rest that is there and I would wait for him no matter how long it takes. But it’s tiring. I hate all these delays that comes to our way and I am worried that there will be more. I want to build the future together. I want to make it possible that there will be our home. I am positive that I want to be with him. I cannot imagine it other way.

Yesterday I donated blood. It was my 8th time. First everything went really well, as usually. When I was sitting in the coffee table and had a snack after the donation, I suddenly felt really bad. I have never felt anything like that :/ And I almost fainted. So the nurses helped me to bed and I waited the bad feeling to pass. It did eventually.

Today I went to see two documentary movies for free with my friend to our university. The first one (After the Blood Diamond) was about people of Sierra Leone after the civil war. It was quite brutal but I think they managed to tell the story of the people quite well. The second one (Kongon Akseli) was about a Finnish man who went to work in Congo in begin of 20th century. I didn’t like it that much. Even though it was interesting, I didn’t like the way the documentary was made. I learned something new though, I didn’t know that there were so many Finnish working in Congo by that time. And those documentaries made me to appreciate my life more. Things are actually quite well in my life.

My trip to Estonia, Latvia, Lithuania and Poland is coming closer! I’m excited :) It will be an adventure that I hoped for this year and I hope I will get another adventure in fall when I probably will go to see my friend in Hong Kong. I wish that I could have an adventure with Antti as well this year. The good moments you want to share with someone special.

This weekend I think I might take a little trip to Vaasa to visit my sister. I tried to call her about it, but she didn’t answer. 3 years ago

I’m feeling very good at the moment. First of all, things are going nicely with the university. I survived the last two weeks, during which I had to write six exams. I even feel like I did quite well considering how little time I had to prepare for each of them.

I also managed to get the green belt in hapkido, which tells me that I’m doing something right and my skills are getting better. Unfortunately I won’t be able to train during the summer months but at least then I can concentrate on developing my physical fitness by jogging, cycling, doing pushups and so on.

The weather has been really beautiful during the last week or so and I finally got my bicycle up and running. This week I have already ridden about 40 kilometers and today I’ll probably ride 20 km more. Riding in sunshine, feeling the warmth on my face and smelling the spring air feels awesome after the cold and snowy winter!

I’m really looking forward to the summer in Wisconsin. Today I was told that my tentative job placement is a poolside snack bar at a hotel, which sounds perfect. I imagine it to be quite similar to my current part-time job as a bartender and I’m sure it’ll be fun.

The only thing I would complain about is the hay fever. I’m getting some of the symptoms in spite of the medication. Luckily it’s not as bad as it used to be when I was a kid. So it’s just a minor annoyance and I won’t let it spoil my good mood. 3 years ago

It’s been a while since my last entry. I’ve been awfully busy for the last couple of weeks and haven’t had much time for anything else but studying, working and socializing with my friends.

I’m in the middle of an exam week at the moment. Tomorrow I have an exam which is not going to go well because I haven’t prepared well enough. I’m not even sure if I’ll pass it or not. Fortunately I can retake the exam in May, before I leave for the USA.

I’ve been thinking about the summer quite a lot and I’m very excited about it. Thanks to Facebook, I’ve been able to get in contact with some people who have been in Dells during previous years and some others who are participating in the same work & travel program this time. I’m sure the summer’s going to be great but before that I have to survive the rest of this academic year. It’s going to get a lot easier as soon as I get this bunch of exams done, but even after that there are some important courses which require effort. 3 years ago

You know one thing I hate more than anything: going to optician and buying new glasses. The optician was actually quite nice, but I hated that he changed again so much my description. The right eye shouldn’t really have needed any more “strength”. The left eye wasn’t surprise. And I really hated choosing new glasses! I am not sure am I happy after all what I picked. I think I should go back. Cos I actually picked what she thought would look good at me. And I guess she was just bored with me and wanted to get rid off me and it wasn’t the best choice. Dammit! 3 years ago

I have given less time to this goal again…This week I really have tried to do my thesis. I still have trouble with the statistic, but I get some help to it on Monday.

I just noticed email that I had gotten. I am not going to Brussels either.

The job situation is still bothering me. I hope that I will get job from cemetery at least. I really hoped that I would had gotten something from my own field, but it’s starting to look like impossible. Sometimes I wonder did I chose the right field at all. And sometimes I feel like I would want to run away and open a cafeteria or something in some other country (warm place). Or hotel. Or sanctuary for animals. Oh that would be cool! I have no idea where I will end up. I just need to hope that things will go as they should. Life cannot be planed. It should be just lived.

I was at movies today. I went with my old workmate who I hadn’t seen in awhile. It was nice. It would have been nice to go to coffee or something after that, but she was busy. Maybe we see soon again. She is moving next month and she has a lot of plants and she doesn’t want to take all of them with her. So I probably will get plants from her :) That would be nice since I just lost 2 of them.

Tomorrow I will clean this apartment! It’s such a mess here. And saturday I will go to book exhibition and later in the evening we are having sauna party! That will be so nice and I will meet lots of new people too since I don’t know many of the people there.

I also got appointment for optician for next week which means that I will get new eye glasses! I hate going to optician though…And I hate how much the glasses costs :/ I think it will cost me at least 250€. Probably even more :/ But I will get sun glasses too! That kind of with I can see :D Hopefully.

And I really miss Antti right now…_{Oh god dammit! The summer will be awful :(}3 years ago

I haven’t written in awhile. Maybe cos I have actually had some stuff going on that I wanted to write to other goal entries. So I won’t go talking about that stuff anymore.

I have felt that a lot of shit things have happened to me lately. So I hope that my luck will turn and something really good will come soon. Or I will lose my mind. Sure there has been good things too, but mostly I feel a bit down now. I won’t give in to pessimistic view or depression. I need to believe that everything will work out just fine, eventually. Sometimes I wonder if is foolish to think that things will work out like that. Maybe they won’t. It’s not that I am just sitting and waiting, I am trying to make things happen. Like I have applied a zillion jobs and I try to be more active in getting shape. I just don’t understand why the good things happens to people around me and not for me. Maybe my turn is later? 3 years ago

Yesterday was quite an evening. I worked from 11PM until 4:30 AM and decided to sit down for a couple of drinks with my workmates after that. Somehow we ended up chatting until 7AM at which point we decided it was time to go to sleep. But since we were hungry, we decided to grab something to eat first and I finally got home and went to sleep around 8AM. 3 years ago

Right now I’m feeling really good about things and the life in general. I’ve got a tremendous plan for the summer, I don’t have too many lectures and all kinds of interesting things are happening. There’s just one assignment which is bugging me a bit, because I don’t have a clear idea how to approach it. Well, tomorrow I’m going to discuss the problem with my pair and hopefully we’ll come up with some good ideas.

Today I found out that I can probably get some financial assistance from my university to cover some of the expenses of my summer work plan. That’s great because I have to pay the flight tickets myself and right now the prices are between 500 and 600 euros for flights to Chicago and back. I will also have to pay for the visa and for an insurance. 3 years ago

I’ve got an awesome back up plan for the summer. The more I thought about it, it felt the right thing to do. I started to stress a bit about not having a job for the summer, so to ease my nerves, I needed to came up solution. And then, just when I was telling Antti about my plan I got a call. So now I have phone interview (cos I couldn’t be there in person) for one of the internships I felt really enthusiastic about. The one that was almost like made for me :D If I get the job, I will miss my adventure in USA, but in the other hand I get the job experience I wanted in Finland. And money. And with that money I can finally make that tattoo happen and get another adventure in the fall. In the opposite direction though: Hong Kong! So, no matter what will happen, it will be just fine :) If I get the job, I sure will take it. If I don’t, I go to volunter in ACE.

I feel ok about Antti going away for the summer too. I think it will be an awesome experience for him. I would have wanted to get do it with him, but I think we will get to visit USA together some other time :)

I’m now at my parent’s house for this week. I’ll spend the rest of the week alone with Caro since my parents will be going to visit my other sister. I think it might be a bit boring… 3 years ago

I had a great weekend in Turku with Henry: nice weather, stupid jokes, funny moments and six hours of knife training. Now I am a bit tired so I’ll probably go to sleep soon.

I’ve been thinking a lot about the two summer job opportunities that I have and the more I think about them, the more I want to go to the USA. Actually I’m quite sure that’s what I’m going to do. It requires careful planning and there are some important things to sort out, but I’m sure everything’s going to be ok. 3 years ago

So I am back from Tampere. Just a few days and then I am off again. Home to my parents this time. I haven’t been there since xmas so it’s nice.

I am a bit worried about my life and future. Everything seems a bit unclear and unsure. I already got two rejections from summer jobs. It’s kinda ok, cos neither of them were what I really wanted to do this summer. I hope and trust that I will hear something positive about other jobs I applied. I really don’t know where I am spending the next summer doing what, but something% 3 years ago

There’s a little bit less of me now. I got rid of that mole on my nape! And I got my first stitches ever. They will be removed next Friday. The doctor said that the mole look just fine and normal so that’s good. They of course will test it though to be sure.

My courses are over! Well I have just one left in April. Then I have couple of book exams and that thesis and then I am finished! I can’t believe that I am this close of graduating :) It feels good, specially if I get myself internship. If I don’t then I am screwed for not having any work experience of my own field. I am assuming that next week I will get some interviews. If I don’t, then it’s pretty sure that I won’t get any :(

This weekend though I am going to Tampere. I probably will take a buss since the trains have been so much late cos of the bad weather. I think buss will be more reliable. It takes longer, but it’s cheaper too. 3 years ago

I’m feeling lazy today. I should probably try to do some studying or write a couple of job applications, but right now I’m not motivated enough. It’s ok, though, because from now on I will have considerably more free time on my hands and I don’t have any really urgent tasks to do. So now I’m just trying to get rid of the stress that I’ve been feeling since the beginning of January.

Yesterday I finally got my long-awaited hapkido uniform (I ordered it in December…). Yay! Yesterday’s training was pretty good, too. I realized that I’m actually doing quite well compared to many others who were on the same beginner’s course, even though I haven’t had time to train really hard lately.

I’m really looking forward to next week because then I should get the results of two job applications. This time I really want have to get a good job or an internship for the summer. The two applications that I’ve sent so far are not directly related to my studies but they would still be beneficial experiences and would definitely look good on my CV.

I’m also feeling more and more positive about my current part-time job as a bartender. This month I’ve had more work shifts than on average and the more I do it, the easier and more enjoyable it gets. I’ve also tried to socialize more with my workmates and it has made the work much more fun.

Hmm, I guess that’s all for today. I’ll go and do something useful now. :-) 3 years ago