When I was in high school I realized how little people really listen to the people they’re in conversations with, so I stopped inserting my ‘what I did last night’ into our group conversations. In college I took this further and decided no one would notice if I just stopped saying ‘goodbye’ when someone left a group of people I was apart of. So I stopped. I withdrew myself and shut myself up and I think this is when my social problems got to be a particular interference in my life. It’s like I decided I didn’t matter. There was nothing about myself as a part of a group that made me worth noticing. As I am writing this I’m shocking myself at how terrible my self esteem must be, but I’m happy to realize it.
To my co-workers and my school mates I am going to say hello, I am going to ask how their weekends were even if mine was boring and I’m going to say goodbye to them, not just walk away. I’m going to be more personal. I think this should be easy and so so good. 4 years ago