stop being jealous

I’ve gotten better. Now it only hurts a little when I see them together…

jealousy sucks. it makes me feel like sh!t about myself, it brings me down, and it keeps me from being happy. most of all it is a waste of time.

So I’m always jealous of people and it’s not cool. I;m jealous of people who have lots of friends and are more easygoing than myself. I’m jelaous of people who have more money than me and come from wealthy families. I’m jealous when my friends make other friends. Sigh.

So yeah, it turns out she has been seeing this guy. Se admitted as much, but I had to drag it out of her kicking and screaming. It’s been a hard time. I still love her, but I’ve moved out of the house now, and tat’s made it a whole lot easier. I know she’s still got issues, and she says she still loves me. But she has a funny way of showing it. I want her to be better, but I also don’t want to be the guy who gets walked over.

I’m still texting her, and she me. She called me the other night when she was upset aout her issues. I don’t know where this is going. But I’ve stopped being up tight about what she might be doing, I just try not to think about it. We’re no longer together, what she does is her business, I just hope she’s not filling a hole with something unwholesome. Yeah, funny situation.

^{i think i’ll always be jelous but i’ve stopping being as jelous which i think is great .
also there are people who i was jelous of before and i’m not now .
people who are accepted for them .
as there are people who accept me for me .
religious people .
as i belive my own things .
(:
i’m doing well !}

I’m sick of being a jealous person. I’m always freaking out about my boyfriend being friends with his ex girlfriend. It’s so lame. I don’t understand why I care so much. I just want to hit her in the face half the time when she’s around. It’s ridiculous, there’s absolutely nothing to be jealous of. Except the fact that he loved her first. I can’t get over it. I just need to know that she will never want him back, and that he’ll never want her back. Now I’m just rambling. Wonderful.

Maybe then I could love myself.

(If you’re curious, I’m jealous of the girl that my ex-boyfriend is now going out with…But that ex-boyfriend is who my “stop loving him” goal is about.)

Some people go out of their way to make me jealous!

I’m constantly thinking about my boyfriend and his ex’s. Always stalking his facebook and myspace to make sure they’re not coming around. and while i was on his facebook yesterday, his stupid ex popped up in a chat. i told her it was me and she immediately started telling me how pretty i was and that she was glad that we were happy. whatever, i know i shouldnt care but i’m just sick of worrying. i really dont know how to stop! i wish they made medicine for this.

^{- i’m really jelous of people ..}

who can just say what they’re feeling . people who have no secrets that they keep inside . and are welcomed and accepted how ever they are .

but at the same time i am jelous of people ..

who have a special secret that no one knows about and they can happily keep to themselves that doesn’t even affect them at all .