not let the little things get to me

leaving my umbrella on the train was one of those “little things”. I was a bit annoyed with myself because it was a really nice umbrella and I had to walk home in the rain – but compared to how I could of reacted, I think I handled it ok.

This is useless. I don’t know how to do it.

Does anyone have some advice?

Actually, I love old people, but I don’t love it when old people drive when they can’t. Actually, the people I really dislike are the people who let these elderly drive and don’t do anything about the danger that they cause!!

I’m no wreckless driver… I’ve been in one car-killing crash while driving, but it wasn’t my fault. Since then, I’ve been even more cautious than I was before, and there was no problem with my over-cautiousness in the first place!

So I’m saying that I really don’t feel that I was the general horrible teen driver, but currently, old people can be just as deadly!

I say this because today an old person cut me off. Okay, fine. Basque in your oldness. Not even bovvered!! I think their top speed was 15 in 55 zone, where, in PA, that seems to mean to do 70. So I was probably doing at least 65 when I realized that they weren’t speeding up. I slammed on my brakes while honking, old woman ain’t even bovvered. So I swerve into the other lane, luckily with no one there. As I move past, I realize that the old woman didn’t look like she even noticed me… or the road in front of her. She was crouched over… Maybe she assumed the sky was the road—I don’t know.

I didn’t get road rage after that, but I got pissed at everything. The new shopping complex magically gained five potholes in the past week, and I was ready to scream when people were stopping where they didn’t have a stop sign.

I mean, seriously. :slaps self:

this is really little
but yesterday my bus left without me
i know the busdriver saw me
but he just took off
at first i felt like i wanted to punch someone
but than i remembered my goal
and i calmed myself down

otherwise I end up eating by myself, in my bedroom, crying my eyes out. I can’t take the little things they do and how I react anymore.

It’s about attitude. At the moment, every single thing my housemate does, I twist it in my head so I look at it negatively and get annoyed because she did something a different way to what I would have done it or whatever. These are THE most trival things. I got a wake up call last night from my boyfriend when I was having a sook about multiple trival things that were getting to me.

I AM SO PICKY and I dont want to be.

So maybe I need to change my attitude.
Interesting, because I’ve always thought I was an optimist and tried to the bright side of everything. Ironicly, maybe thats just me being optimistic.

I heard that saying again the other day, and it still bugs me. The one that goes, “Shoot for the moon, because if you miss you’ll at least be in the stars.” Uh hello, no you won’t, hehe. The moon has an elliptical orbit, so it isn’t always the same distance from the Earth, but the average radius is around 238,855 miles, with the furthest distance being 252,711 miles and the closest being 221,456 miles. That being said there are 5,878,499,812,499 miles in a light year. Proxima Centauri is part of the Alpha Centauri system and is the closest star to the Earth at 4.3 light years. So in no way is it even close. Not that I want to be all crabby about a goal oriented saying, but I’m a Cancer, so I get a little touchy when it comes to things about the moon, hehe.

So this is me going against the grain. I didn’t have a place to post my little random rants, but I do now. Right now it’s the OCD stuff. Like how some of the items on my 43 things list start with capitals and others don’t. This bothers me. And the smiley face that someone put in one of them, but mine was otherwise just like it so it wouldn’t let me get rid of it. Or people mixing up then and than.

I realize that this might make me sound picky. I would say insane too, but I’m sure I manage that else where as well. But hey, what’s a blog without a rant? So this is mine.

Not letting the little things get to me is a constant battle but I’m still trying to fight the good fight… I can’t help but wonder if my heart is made of glass; the smallest things seem to chip away at it.

This week has been especially trying at work, and I’ll be going home this weekend; we’ll see how well I do.

I went home this weekend and stayed with my family at the house where I haven’t lived for five years. I do enjoy spending time with my mom, dad, and sister, but it’s difficult to not be bothered by how much I don’t fit in to their world now. Additionally, my parents pay much more attention to my sister and treat her very differently-granted she’s a different child and we have a very different situations. But little things, like my mom making a huge deal over how my sister can’t start projects because she has writer’s block (something I have struggled with forever but when I lived at home, I was accused of being lazy and procrastinating and was provided with no support) really get to me.

I was having a good evening, enjoying being out with her until she started talking about this. I started thinking about all the times I was frustrated to tears and she ignored me or criticized me while now she lavishes so much attention on my sister and was unable to enjoy the rest of the night with her.

It’s little things like this that can ruin my day, change my mood, and question myself constantly. This will not be a simple change as I have thought like this for a long time-changing cognitive behavior is not as easy as popping a pill, but I need to make this a part of my daily behavior because all the little things are eating me up and wasting my valuable time and energy.