speak confidently/ express myself better

My ex told me my conversational skills are underdeveloped. And that this makes me seem younger than my age. I was always aware of this and my unreasonable fear to speak up, but hearing it from someone else makes me hate it even more. This is so frustrating…don’t even know how to start.

I’ve always had problems with confidence, particularly more so in the past. I did get help with this and in my daily life I’ve changed dramatically, and the more I have “put myself out there” the easier it has become. I then recently had a conflict situation arise with my son’s class teacher, she has very little in the way of approachability, and during my meeting with her I had to express to her my issues with the way she had reprimanded my son. What I wasn’t expecting was for her to lie to my face and challenge me outright. I had been hoping for us to work together to come to a solution that suited us both but what I got was a very defensive woman who literally “stared me down” and made me feel like I was a child again. I came away feeling so unhappy, angry and frustrated and have now resolved to work on my confidence to include situations like this. I want to be able to say with confidence ” No you are wrong” in a clear voice, without the blushing, darting eyes, squirming in my seat, blustery conversation and feeling like it’s me who is guilty. I came away from that meeting feeling like an incompetent fool but resolved to go to the next one as a calm and confident woman, who knows what needs to be said, and who can say it clearly and with ease. I aim to be able to hold a conversation with people like this teacher and to be able to think suitable answers when I am there in front of them rather than hours later when I am re-running the conversation in my head for the umpteenth time. :-D Wish me luck…I may well need it!

I’ve always been very quiet and shy, reluctant to say anything or put my opinion forward, always answering questions with just a ‘yes’ or ‘no’ and avoiding conversation. But I am much, much better now than I was a year ago, and getting better. The only person I can really talk to openly and be completely comfortable with is my boyfriend. But I have two very good friends that I’m getting there with. As for people in general, I still have a long way to go. But I’m happy with where I am, and where I’m headed. I’m still shy about putting my opinions forward, and I get tongue-tied and nervous, so what I want to say doesn’t always get across. But I’m doing much better than I ever have before, and I’m continuing to make progress. Just have to keep working at it.

i cannot express myself. i am afraid of taking on asssertive role, i tend to ignore things at the office aslong as it is no bother to me. if i am speaking to someone about something, i easily got upset and my heart start to beat fast so i have to stop in the middle. i need help. i am failing my communication caourse as a result at the university

It will be my downfall. I cannot express how I feel about the things I love, and that hinderance will prevent me from getting into Yale, among other things.

My problem is that I feel any words I can think of to descrive my passion(s) are insufficient and unworthy. I use the word “passion” tentatively, because the cliche that word holds almost sickens me. There are no other words, though. It is a devastating catch-22.

This is a very worthwhile goal and you can get help for this by just asking—for free. I would be happy to direct you to a free place to start this.

Learning to speak confidently and express my opinions and ideas would be a huge improvement for me, both professionally and personally. I’m thinking about checking out a local Toastmasters club to see if that would help.

Like others who have posted about this, I have difficulty with conflict. I also tend to rely more on the ‘listener’ role when I am in a conversation, particularly with someone I admire, which gives the impression that I have nothing to say. I’m much more comfortable expressing difficult things in writing than out loud. That’s what I want to work on.

THis will probably one of my lifetime goals as I’ve always had this problem of talking to people and articulating the right messages that I have in my mind.

I guess its probably becuase I’m quite a quiet and shy person and not a very good listener and i tend to talk really quickly and quietly so this is something i need to work on. . .