Dear 43 Things Users,

10 years after introducing 43 Things to the world, we have decided we have met our last goal: completing the incredible experience that has been 43 Things. Please join us in giving one last cheer to all the folks who have shared their goals with the world, as well as all the people who have worked at The Robot Co-op to build this incredible website. We won a Webby Award, published a book, and brought happiness to a lot of people.

Starting today, 43 Things users can export their goals and entries from the site. Starting August 15, we will make the site “read only”. 43 Things users will still be able to view the site and export their content, but we won’t be taking any new content from users. We hope to leave the site up for folks to see and download their content until the end of the year. Ending on New Year’s Eve takes us full circle.

It has been a long ride (one of our original goals was to "build a company that lasts at least 2 years” - we beat that one!) While we wish the site could live on, it has suffered from a number of challenges - changes in how people use the site, the advertising industry, and how search engines view the site. We wish the outcome was different – but we’ve always been realistic about when our goals are met and when they aren't.

As of today, you will be able to download your goals and entries. See more about that on the FAQ page. Thanks for 10 great years of goal-setting and achieving.

- The Robots.

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be less sensitive

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baileys_truffleHSP

Sometimes I feel sad for no apparent reason. Maybe its depression. Perhaps its just me.

Ive come to realise recently that I am a Highly Sensitive Person… it explains why sounds bother me so much, why I love peace and quiet, why I get overwhelmed and exhausted around people, why Ive become increasingly jumpy, why I seem to absorb and reflect other peoples emotions, and why comments bother me so much.

Ive not yet figured out a way to deal with these things, but I am accepting of them. Work has been an enormous test… lunching alone has been a necessary struggle if I want to get through the day, of course, not going with my colleagues doesnt sit well with everyone and the incessant comments about my antisocial behaviour is something that affects me daily. In fact, comments about any aspect of me is something I try to ignore. I am sensitive and take things to heart… I know most of the time its banter, but part of me feels that some of what they say may have an element of truth.

After admitting to finding several guys in the canteen attractive, I was subject to being the talk of the office. It took me back to my younger years where guys would be teased for knowing I fancied them… maybe I imagined it, but Ive not known anyone to be pleased by that thought. I wish Id kept it to myself… Im tired of being alone, but am loathe to admit it especially in the face of rarely being fancied.

The guy from the dating site Im talking to is still in the picture. He said a few things to me a few days ago, that suggested he needs someone who can keep him guessing… not sure that would be me. As much as Im still learning about myself, his ability to read me makes me feel so exposed. 3 months ago


user1394905683 4 months ago


Taqwa_Salah#8

I asked myself this question today, is this goal correct? I mean do I really have to work hard to force myself into being less sensitive? Is it right this way?

Or should I just embrace this extreme sensitivity toward people/things/events/experiences ? 4 months ago


baileys_truffleDowner

Had ‘one of those days’ where I experienced the spite of my younger sister. Its becoming so much of a habit nowadays its not even funny. She holds a serious grudge and has literally memorised every time I’ve slighted her, its beyond me.

We were getting on okay, watching movies together but she decided to be vindictive. Honestly, its hard when someone shows such hate towards you and only you 90% of the time. The worst part is that when it affects the family, Im forced to forgive and forget which I feel just lets her think that her actions are okay. It makes me feel I should put up with someone treating me wrongfully. But I dont… I just don’t have the energy, its unfair and its undeserving and I have enough love and respect for myself not to accept it anymore. 6 months ago


lovingthoughts 6 months ago


Taqwa_Salah#7 This conversation with mum that I was trying to avoid ...and still trying

Back in college days some of my friends were telling how their moms stress and push on them to bleach, taking care of their outer appearance, and attending each and every single wedding party so as to be “seen” by others. I was all the time bragging about how mum never talked to me about such things, and how she believes that education should come first a head of every thing else, and obtaining my college degree should be my number one priority. I was so comfortable with that ‘cause doing the so-girly stuff was nt really my thing.

Now I graduated, an year ago. I am twenty two year-old and then suddenly my mum was doing THAT kind of conversation, the one i was bragging for never having it with her.

-“Why your skin is so dark?”
-“We just attended a wedding party and the bride was younger than you are!”
-“Stop reading so much books! you are wasting your time! Girl,it is not about books.”
-“Do you even remember the last time you applied a fairness cream on your face?”
-“Befriending boys? You better know a man and marry him and start having an independent responsible life.”

And this kind of things, will let you imagine other stuff.
And it hurts me. A LOT. I was really really sad, and I dont even blame my mother, almost the whole local society here acts the same way.

No one accepts you the way you are, and then you have to change who you are, and then you became fake, and then anyone likes you, and then you think you are happy ‘cause you are accepted. The whole thing is a big fat lie.

I am a bookworm, i constantly read, or thinking about the next book to read, or spending money on books, or discovering new bookstores and libraries, or giving away books to the very special people I know, or begging others to bring me books. I dont watch TV that much, and I hate big gatherings.I am always wearing those big nerdy -2.5 eye glasses ‘cause I cant see (and live) without them, and i have acne and some other skin problems. There is ALWAYS a book in my bag, i dont leave house without a book. I feel so insecure without one! And I spend most of the time coding something or browsing I.T blogs. Im fully convinced that I am young to marry, I still feel like I want to meet new people and get myself into new experience, try new things.

My mother wants to change me into a totally different version of “Taqwa”, and she feels so uncomfertable about the current way and style of my life.

Now i am trapped in the middle between changing me just to please my mother, and keeping the originality of who I am because this is authentic. I still find it difficult listening to all these hints from other people, acknowledging their dislike about the way I am, and I keep ignoring it, but when it comes from mum it is even more awkward! And sadly, I am a highly-sensitive person, a very very very highly-sensitive person. You can imagine how I feel when I am stuck at such a situation. 7 months ago


baileys_truffleFeelings

I always have to let my feeling runs their course. I cannot rush them, I simply have to let them evolve. No matter how silly or unjustified I know they are, when I feel something it stays with me till it wears off.

So every year, its tradition for me to make sausage rolls and mince pies for christmas. If I dont we simply wont have any (shop bought arent the same). But this year my mother offered to help and initially I was really happy. After all, I absolutely detest touching raw meat and rolling out the sausages. Except, she started making the dough for the pastry and all I could do was stand and watch.

She noticed my mood had shifted because it seemed she was taking over and now not only do I feel annoyed, I feel guilty for how my annoyance has made her feel.

I think it has something to do with giving up control over something I see as my responsibility and also the fact that I hate asking for help and assistance, no matter how desperate I might be for it. :/ 7 months ago


Taqwa_Salah#6 An introvert person troubles ... yes again *sigh*

So I went to that tweetup and I have absolutely no idea why did I do that! Asln I did nt know that there was a tweetup there! I was just supposed to meet a friend at a café here to give him a book and he told me that he is going to be there with 5 friends he mentioned and I said to myself, ok 5 cool why not…will definitely come, give you the book, have small chat with your friends and leave to the house.

So the five turned out to be ten, and after an hour the ten became twenty, and finally I understood that what I got myself into was a “private tweetup” planned by people already know each other and they keep it private by not announcing it on twitter so they could keep the circle of attendee small, or for whatever reason I just dunno.

Need to remind you that I am an INTROVERT perrrrson! I started to paranoid by this big group of people, they were twenty something and I don’t know anyone ANYONE except for the guy whom I was supposed to lend the book to. They did nt even bother to introduce themselves ‘cause they already know each other well, and I even heard someone standing behind me wondering who are those new faces here! That was honestly offensive.

Anyway, I told myself not to panic and start acting mature and socializing those people. And THANK GOD the girl setting next to me was a bookworm like me so there was something in common and we had a good small talk, I think that was the only good part about the whole thing. I left when it was close to sunst and I did nt even finish my cherry crumble :-/ I felt so stressed I just wanted to leave back home and stay in the house for awhole week not meeting anyone I know. I know it might looks strange or weird but this is an everyday-introvert-people struggle. (sigh)

The day was aweful, not because of the people there but because of the way I respond to anything. At the middle of that thing I told myself that it is a way of going out of the so called “comfort zone”, but that was nt cool , just dunno why I felt this way. 11 months ago


Taqwa_Salah#5 I have absolutely no idea what this entry is about !

Yes I am saying it again, pleasing everyone you know is something impossible, something stupid actually. And whenever you tried to act yourself, no one like it. I know I am an over-reacted queen emotionaly I don’t know it might seems stupid and silly to someone else but I just keep thinking about that “silly” thing over and again, my head would not quit thinking and I just extremely hate it despise it whenever that happens! That is really exhausting!!
Right now I don’t know exactly what I am writing and why, the one thing I have been good at is screaming out loud silently through these random writing, how healthy is that lol ! ‘cause if there is one thing that I hate it would be complaining to people, unless it was my psychiatrist because this is his job, otherwise, no no need to complain to anyone. It is not that I have a trust issue or something, but no one will understand you 100 %. That is for sure a fact.

So many things happened today, and at the end of the night I found me listening to fix you by Coldplay and feeling upset. And I just felt so awfully upset but could nt identify exactly which of the soooooooooooo many things was the trigger of this blue feeling.

They say it is ok not to be ok, but no it is not that simple, words and quotes are easy to be said. And if you were a sensitive-over-reacted person like me you would understand the burdens of the too much everything you do just trying to be normal. I honestly stopped pretending to be normal for a while, now when I feel the need to cry, I cry. When I don’t feel good, I don’t fight it to smile or act like everything is cool.

And I still don’t know what I am writing about!!

ONE TWEET MADE ALL THAT MESS, could you believe that !! one tweet! I could simply ignore it and scroll down the timeline like nothing happened but I kept thinking and thinking and thinking like an idiot and felt so confused and random and here is the mess! 13 months ago


Taqwa_Salah#4 So over-reacted

I was supposed to meet my friend (H) today but he did nt confirm it and my work day was over and he did nt call or text, plus there was no suitable place near the bank i work in so as to stay and wait for him. So I left to house.

And in my way back house another friend (N) called me saying that he is in a certain place and wanted my help in a survey he is working at. The bus I usually take passes by that place so i met him and we talked and worked on his survey.

While I was chit-chatting with my friend (N), (H) called me and I told him that I am with (N) and asked him to come over. Since (H) and (N) already knew each other I thought that there would be nothing wrong if I just meet them both at the same time, since they both did nt confirm earlier at what time we were supposed to meet, they made me so confused !!

I felt (H) sudden surprised pause over the phone, he then said forget about it Im nt coming and that was all. I could nt understand whether he was upset or misunderstood me or is it my fault that I should meet my friends individually . I just could nt understnd anything. Absolutelty nothing!

Then I texted Mr H and he didnt reply, so i guessed he was upset with my behaviour. And after then I felt so annoyed and frustrated for my stupid act, YOU JUST HAVE NO IDEA HOW FRUSTRATED I AM !!! I was so far beyond just frustration. And what makes it worse is my damn sensitivity. Iam so over-reacted person. I felt the need to scream, I found me talking to myself OUT LOUD in public street and two guys were staring at me, and when i cameback home I just tweeted about it and screamed it all inside my pillow. Litterly. And kept telling myself that : “OMG H would b very angry now that is why he ignored my msg !!” I dont know why I was panicking like that.

But at the end I have convinced myself that I need to take a break from trying to please everyone around me, and hold a book and just read since it helps me to let go those bad vibes sometimes.

But I really do hate this senitivity thingie. It is what forces me to act and think this way. 13 months ago


Taqwa_SalahA question

Is it really that bad to be an emotional person that cries a lot ? 16 months ago


Miss Marlboro 19 months ago


LawlietZ 2 years ago


littleelephant 2 years ago


user16026 2 years ago


mooody6 2 years ago


Nell09Untitled

This was easier than I thought. Counseling + Lexapro. 2 years ago


Nell09 8 years ago


SapphireSkiesx92 3 years ago


ohdear18 5 years ago


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