re-establish lost friendships

Hmmm… I wonder if there’s rules or hints on how to connect better with old friendships. I traded e-mail with a friend from high school last week; we gave our capsule descriptions of what’s happened in the last 25 years to both of us, described a little of who we’d become, and about each of our families. She’d even gave contact info and suggested saying hi if we were ever in her town. It was all nice, and it would be interesting seeing here… but there’s a part of me hesitating at saying “that sounds great, let’s all get together some time” because I’m not sure it’ll ever happen. We’ve got all sorts of friends we’ve been bad about seeing, and I just wasn’t sure I wanted to say “yes, getting together would be fun” unless I was sure we were going to do it.

So would getting together be fun – a chance to get back into touch, share stories of who we’d all become, find new common ground – or would it just be like a high school reunion where we’d have a pleasant time, share stories, and then realize there wasn’t enough in common to keep the contact up?

How much do we need to prioritize how we tend our friendships, and which friendships should we be focusing on over others?

i would like to reconnect with my friends from high school. we used to talk whenever we came home from college, but i haven’t even seen or talked to any of them in forever. now that we are all grown up and living in different places it will be hard, but i would like to let them know i still think about them and we should get together whenever we have a chance. this will be harder than it sounds i imagine…

I finally started using Facebook seriously when I found their iPhone application. Now, I’m finding myself checking everyone’s status during the commute. Facebook’s a great way to waste time during the bus ride to work.

It’s also getting me back into contact with friends on the East Coast. Before, e-mail turnaround was just too long; we’d either give a curt reply immediately, or lose the letter in our inbox as we thought about a response.

So Facebook isn’t evil and actually makes my life better. I like that.

I commented a few months back that although I’d gotten in touch with some old friends, sometimes the socializing just didn’t stick, and I felt like I was doing all the work trying to get back in touch.

No more.

One old friend from college dropped me a note and suggested we get together for dinner, and used his birthday as a great excuse to force us both to choose a date to get together. That worked great, and we had a fun time between ourselves and spouses. We’re all hoping we can get together again soon.

Another friend from elementary school who I hadn’t heard from just dropped me a note. I’d kept meaning to contact him, but never quite got around to it. It’s too bad, too, for he used to work a few miles from me, but he’s now between jobs and a good forty miles away.

I’m happy and flattered that they took the time to get back in touch (and that they’re both checking e-mail regularly these days.)

Time for me to share the kindness and explicitly plan to get together with other friends too!

My friends, Katy and Craig, hosted a small dinner for me on Sunday night. It was extremely low-key and utterly blissful.

This goal is going very well. I was a little worried when I first posted it, because it just didn’t seem like I had any real motivation to see it through. I’m guessing the depression I’d been experiencing was the blame for this fear. Thankfully, the depression has pretty much subsided and my friendships are getting back on track.

The card I sent to my long-lost friend led to a phone call, which led to lunch and hanging out. I couldn’t be happier!

I sent out my first greeting card in a long time. It’s not so easy to reconnect, after all, but I’m definitely sure that this is too important to ignore. The friendships I have are fabulous and they should be nurtured, so they will last.

Today’s card was certainly a good way to re-open a dialogue with a much-loved friend. :-)

i dont think i can.

I just re-established contact with a girl that I went to college with. It was great to catch up with her, but tough to summarize your life in such little time.