stop eating my feelings

Sometimes when I get a bad grade on a test I go ahead and eat all night. I don’t want to but its the only thing that makes me feel better. Im getting worried its effecting my heath and relationships with people….Sometimes i wish i could stop eating.

I have had a trying time lately to say the least. I have been aware when I am about to binge or eat something which would affect me badly and I have managed to weigh up whether it is worth it. The answer is always no. I hope I can keep to this and not binge. It is a cliche, but being aware that there was a problem is the first and most important step. If I am at the start of what might turn into a binge, I can remember and stop myself and think it through – “how will this make me feel afterwards?”.
I’m marking this as done, but t is still an ongoing process.

If something happens with a friend or my husband that makes me feel threatened, neglected or otherwise miserable, I reach for the bread/cake/sugar. I also used to reach for the booze. I am quite aware with the food these days so i can question what I am doing, but the response is so visceral, it is the loudest voice in my head “GIIIVE MEEE CAAAYKE”. When I drank, I had no clue what was going on until the hangover and I could work out what it was that set me off.

Luckily it’s not habitual, it happens reasonably seldom for my weight to be unaffected, but it’s enough to bug me. There are some solutions, I think -

I could stop caring too much what other people do and toughen up or be far more independant; I could tell the other person what is going on, but frankly this is risky as I can be quite the drama queen in my head and a day later think “wtf was that about?!” ; write it out – sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn’t, it’s worth trying anyway.

Im fat. I spent soooo much time swallowing down my emotions. I eat for the comfort. Once I figured this out my appetite slowed Way down!