say no and not feel guilty

Said no to something yesterday because I am getting taken for a mug – did I feel guilty – yes very! Should I have – NO not at all!

I am going to do this and stop being such a push over!

i always feel guilty regardless if i am wrong or not and i really have a problem saying no.

Say no and not feel guilty

I am so easily guilt-tripped into doing things I really don’t want to do and then I resent the people who asked me. Its just an awful situation all around. I’m such a push over. I just need to grow a pair ;)

My mom always asks me to do something.
Reasons being.
She just got back surgery a while ago and can hardly do anything.
But the things she’s capable of doing.. She always asks someone else to do.

It’s ridiculous.

Then if I do say no. She gives me a guilt trip.
I can’t stand it.

My last boyfriend and I had a really bad break up. He turned out to be a total jerk and made my life hell. He threatened to hurt everyone I cared about and constantly rang me up to abuse me or to guilt-trip me.
When he asked if we could be friends, I felt too mean to say no. But everytime I forgave him, he threw it back in my face within hours, abusing me again and again.
The more he did this, the more I realised I had no reason to feel guilty for not being nice to him. He was breaking me down and I was letting him, because I felt too guilty to say no.
There’s nothing wrong with considering your own feelings as well as others.

My whole life I’ve always tried to get along with everyone. I think that this has put me into the “victim” state too many times to count! I don’t like to rock the boat. However, I find myself crabbing about it afterwards if I’ve allowed myself to be talked into something and then later wish I hadn’t. I allow myself to be a victim. Last week I stood up and said NO to someone I love and respect that has constantly put me down for a decision I made 4 yrs ago…and they never seem to tire of bringing it up. Trying always to make me feel guilt for something I do not regret. So, I said I had to stop this conversation…and that they needed to know I would not ever feel regret for what I chose for my life, and that every time they say those words it is painful to me and cruel.
Of course, my relationship with this person may change, but I have come to the realization that change can be good and sometimes very needed. So, I feel liberated and empowered that I stood up and said NO MORE.

One of my instructors suggested I should read the book “When I say no, I feel guilty” by Manuel J. Smith. He said it would help!