get over a breakup

5 months ago(almost 6 actually) my boyfriend of 4 years broke up with me and i’ve spent this time barely holding myself together. i really had no idea it was coming, we were best friends and i could not believe this person who i loved so much could hurt me so badly. we were each other’s first everything..we even went to college together and i thought we were different from other couples and that we’d last. the truth is, nothing ever really works out and nothing is like it seems. i was so stupid and naive to think that a relationship that started when i was 14 would last forever. while this time apart has been awful and i’ve unfortunately begged him to take me back numerous times, it’s finally starting to get better. there are other things out there besides him, new guys and new experiences that i never would have had if he were in the picture. no matter what you may think, time goes on and you eventually just move on day by day. i still think about him daily, little things that i’d like to tell him or just something that reminds me of him, but i don’t call/text him like i would have before. i’m proud to say i’ve gone 11 days without any contact (that’s actually really good for me- the longest ive gone without speaking to him for 4 years) this time apart has also shown me that a relationship like that was actually pretty unhealthy. i depended on him entirely too much, especially in college where he was the only one i knew, and had no one to turn to once the relationship was over. thank god my friends back home are amazing and helped me through those last months of school via phone calls and facebook lol. all i have to say is that i wont ever be that vulnerable around any guy ever again..i’m still working on it, but i can honestly say i don’t want him back anymore

I’ve been working on a break-up blog that has completely flatlined and has NO readership. Although it has been therapeutic and I wanted to remain private, I am still disappointed that NO ONE is partaking. I would appreciate any comments. I’ve been trying hard to keep it “un-diary-like” but it’s hard.

I did buy a book today called “Single” by Judy Ford. The subtitle is “the art of being satisfied, fulfilled, and independent.” I will most certainly leave a review for my fellow 32 “break-up-ees” – I hope it’s a good as it sounds.

its been a year and i guess the festive season makes people get more emotional and brings back more memories. 3 years long distance, been throu hell, thought love conquer it all,thought he was the one, but it came to an end.Move 5000miles, to a totally strange country to be with him but just didnt work. Went throu depression and insomnia for half a year, cant sleep without the pills. Came out of it, and went thru phases of going out partying every weekend, drunk, ended crying worst than ever and feeling blue than ever.

I realised this gotta stop. I need to gain back my confidence, and figured all the wrongs I did in the relationship and improve myself to a better person for my next partner. I’m still working on it. But there are always this emptiness in me and the fear of not able to find such love or someone again my life. I know I need to get rid of this negativity.

it’s been almost two months…

it’s about freakin time. It took me about 18 months!

Ive split up with my ex again. we been on and off for the past year and a half although we did date very shortly 8 years ago, and yet again I am toying with the thoughts of how to win him back, does he just need time alone etc etc. when i contact him after a break up in the past he runs after me but i feel neglected by the fact that I had to iniciate the contact. this time it is more serious as he has admitted he wants no children in his future as his are grown up but i am still ypng and this is what I dream of. i know he can not give me the happy ending i wish for yet it still hurts. i want more to be free from the need to have someone there and to be honest it could probably be anyone but for the time it is him!!!!!! what to do???

Getting over my breakup. Talked about it yesterday with a mutual friend, ( a girl) who was on the other side of the fence, in terms of being a young woman, in her prime who got out of a committed relationship. I guess this isn’t exactly the same situation, in fact it was a lot more serious. However, point is made, that many hot women in their prime want independence, and do not want to be locked down. Fantasies of being a career woman, who has power, must be entertained now, as the early 20’s-30’s present a small time frame in which to This specifically goes for hot women, who know they can get into a relationship when they want. My friend also mentioned how her relationship became incompatible “when she was the guy” in the relationship. IE—having to deal with neediness from the other end. Again, another reason of why I, as a man, must get my shit together, and do my own thing! Despite the fact, that priorities in life revolve around locking down a hot girl, this will only be possible if I have something to fall back on, something to shoot for that will give me balance and stability. This is why now would be the perfect time to work on my own interests, and work on my game on the side. This weekend, for example, was a step forward.
1) Smiled with numerous women, received smiles back.
2) Approached and conversated with:
- waitress (7.7)(got number)
-hot, interesting girl (8.7) no number, because moving away to SF.
3) couple at bar. Was able to engage Bowser girl, and sort of wingman with friend. Friend didnt really get it, but it’s a start. Later on, got digits from interesting girl (7.3-This girl was actually really cool, feel like would be a good match for friend. Don’t know how I would be able to pull a Woolery, or if that even matters-but this girl seemed pretty girlfriendy)
4) Group set, no numbers—however could have gotten dig from short asian girl.

THINGS TO WORK ON
1) Make girl say no. Hot girl at first party, was into me, however gave me a legit excuse as to why things wouldnt work. That said, could have been persistent and chivalrous. Think of ways to get together, when those girls arise, its ok to be nice guy (Ie: I gotta see you again)
2) Get over fear of 9s. Two opps presented themselves, blonde with dog walking across the street, and hot bitchy brunette at party.
SOLUTION-memorize, preparatory openers to begin with-Remember observational approach-SEE ENTRY/NMP method (Openers, past memories-kino, close)

I’m 27 and still trying to get over a relationship with a girl that broke it off with me after a year, and thinking that its the end of the road, when I know it isnt, and I have been going out around my hometown just trying to meet new people, and it feels sleazy as I have yet to find people my age. Any friends that I have are in either new york or philadelphia and I am here, at home which is ok for now, I guess i need to perservere and save up money which will help me out a lot in the long run. like hannah said, just get an easy job and chill for a minute, you dont have to be a big shot although being in this art world area just seems sooo wrong right now, but maybe thats cause its gonna be a hard road to travel and I just gotta stick with it.

Hello everyone,
It’s been 4 days since my boyfriend of 2 years broke it off with me. I feel so confused and overwhelmed sometimes, but everyday I feel better and better. I just keep telling myself that I can’t be with my first love forever. I have to experience other relationships and encounters before I settle down. It still hurts. My logical brain is telling me that it’s better this way, that we just wanted different things. The prospect of meeting new people really excites me, but sometimes my heart wins over my logical brain and tells me that it really hurts.

All you need is time, really, and good friends.