Forgive Yoko for splitting up the Beatles

Well let’s face it: John and Paul were having huge ego fights with each other and George and Ringo were getting bored in the background. I think we need to blame Mark David Chapman a lot more. Cancer too! You must know that as they got older four healthy Beatles would have reunited and gone back to studio like all of the other rock super-stars. Question is: Would we still love them if they were lazy, old, rich jerks who never had been sobered by deaths? Who slap some third-rate album together and charge $130 to sit in the nosebleeds at their concerts?

It takes more than one person to have a dispute. And well, the beatles had done what they were going to do, if they’d kept going they would have self-destructed and gotten old and washed up anyway. Let it be.

John loved May more anyway.

I’m over it.

...but since I’ll always be bitter about the Beatles splitting up, I may as well blame Yoko.

Ever since childhood I have had a fierce, deep hate for Yoko Ono. I was raised on the Beatles. My dad used to wake me up on the weekends by playing their albums. So when I finally was old enough to understand the whole Yoko Ono thing, I got pretty angry. As far as I was concerned, it was ALL HER FAULT that I didn’t have more Beatles songs to dance to in the living room. I still practically hiss every time her name is mentioned. I’m twenty now, which brings the Yoko-hating year count to something like fourteen. So I guess it’s time to let it go.

Maybe.

It was like an epiphany as I watched the Rolling Stones slog through some very bad songs during the Super Bowl. Perhaps Yoko prevented The Beatles from becoming like this? I’ll not lavish the praise just yet. Forgiveness will suffice for now.

I can’t believe he and Paul actually recorded that piece of garbage. I wonder what that discussion was like. I know they both took writing credit for the songs they wrote, even if a song was written by only one of them, it was always Lennon/McCartney, but I can just hear Paul: “Yanno John, maybe we’ve taken this thing as far as she’ll go, I don’t know that I want me good name attached to a piece of rubbish like that. Maybe we should just give the credits to Ringo like we did on that silly octopus number.” At least it was never put on a Beatles album. But still, John should have saved that for his solo stuff, maybe as a B side to “Oh Yoko”.

I watch her sitting there behind John on “Let it Be” and think “who the hell does she think she is, they are The Beatles, you don’t just go to one of their recording sessions and sit there with the band and expect everybody to be ok with it.” And then I watch the Powerpuff Girls episode “Meet the Beat Alls” and laugh my ass off because Moko Jono looks more like Yoko than Yoko does.