find the balance between talking too much and talking too little

srs.

apparently i talk too much.
but it used to be that i was talking too little.

wtf?

i guess now ill have to learn to shut up more. great.

I thought this goal would be those ones that should last forever on my list. But I think I’m ready to check it as done. Lately I’m always paying attention in the things I say and their impacts. I’m always avoiding talk about other people’s lives, even when everybody around me is doing it. Sure that I have less conversations, my life is being calm and without many news. Someone could say it’s not very interesting (including me sometimes), but I’m felling better this way.
I’m little scared about the image the people I met recently have about me. Sometime ago, none would say I’m calm, tranquil, peaceful and, wow, “zen”. I heard these things last week and, since that, I’m always thinking about this goal. I’m trying to get used to this new me.
Sure it’s a thing I learned and I’ll use forever in my life. Probably I’ll have some moments talking more that I should, but, who won’t? The matter is I’m concluding I changed a lot and this new habits came to stay.

I don’t think I know how to define talking too much or talking to little. I like the concept but don’t know how to take action on the idea.

Do I talk too much? What is talking too much?
If both parties are enjoying the conversation can you talk too much?

This goal is not easy to define.

Anyone have any ideas on this goal?

I find my mouth running all the time. My record is six hours.
Bah, bah, bah.

I am going to give this some thought.

if i have to interrupt, so be it!

Lately I’ve been pondering the idea of right speech as in Buddhism. I’m intrigued by Joseph Goldstein’s experiment:

http://people.tribe.net/nunsequitur/blog/aea858fc-eb46-4054-ad08-62abfdbbd735

I find that fascinating. I come from a family that always talks about those who aren’t there (which means we don’t ever talk about the present, or - heaven forbid - how we feel about each other). This involves a lot of judgment. I find it hard to break out of the habit, and I notice now that most people seem to like and even demand stories and talk about other people. I think it would be hard to remain a social being and not talk about others.

I also realize that part of right speech is connecting with others through speech and that means that I do need to talk with others, so cutting out 90% of my speech is out of the question! (I already talk very little.)

I’d like to find a middle way. An obvious possibility is to talk only positively about third parties, but that isn’t exactly balanced either.

This is a real challenge for me because I try to judge my quantity and subject of conversations based on who I am conversing with.

Sometimes I talk too much and one person is bored, although another might not be bored at all. But then when I don’t talk enough it annoys some, makes me seem angry to others, or just simply boring.