let go and feel free

i am feeling a little bit freer these days… feels good

1. love
2. meditate
3. swim
4. write
5. kiss
6. breathe
7. smile
8. cry
9. give
10. sing
&
11. dance

and stop struggling

^{i don’t even know what that would look like anymore}

i can call this one done. this was one of my major goals and i was just writing in my journal and wrote “i finally feel free” and realized i had accomplished it. i got a letter full of every emotion, a beautiful sad lovely love letter jam-packed with everything that would make me want to hang on for dear life, but still, i let go and after i cried for hours and hours i felt free. finally.

i am feeling free of work. of him. i have let go of the life i have been leading and that has been keeping me stuck. i am so excited to move onto what’s next!

let’s see if i’ll feel free now…

to let this be ok, to let go of old stale paradigms, to free myself of poisonous self-images, to feel free now, just free to fly with all of the new possibilities

hanging on hanging on so tight. disappointed in myself… no longer feel free, i feel stuck. none of this matters and it is not real. why does it seem so important?

letting go comes first now… the job business, it’s over and done with all of a sudden and it is time to move on. this day has been coming and now that it is here i am surprised at my surprise and at how much it hurts, at how much this has hurt my feelings. but it really is time to let go… if i can i think i will feel a freedom i haven’t felt in years. i think i’m gonna need help with this one though.

let go of a big one yesterday and hope to stay free ~ ~ ~ am allowing things to stay the SAME. been working hard for change in my community but can suddenly see that while the status quo is uncomfortable for me (actually any status quo is uncomfortable for me)it is not necessarily uncomfortable for everybody else. i am giving up my quest for change, at least this particular quest for change.

allowing things to stay as they are, finding my place and my happiness in the way things are here right now allows me to feel free right now, and to like what i have right now, and to take care of me right now, and to stop feeling stressed, and allows me to rest, which is what i need the most.

packed up my office today… am letting go of the place and beginning to feel free of years of nasty looks, mean words, cutting comments…. but it is only a leave, and will be back with it all again in March. Still i feel free for now!